Discriminating guests

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MountainMystery's picture
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02/23/2013

Got one more vent to share, cause it's been a trying Memorial weekend.  Smiling

My husband is not American-born. He's got an accent and darker skin so it's fairly obvious, especially in this area of the South. He's been called Indian, Mexican, and Middle Eastern, yet he's none of these. Thankfully, he doesn't let this really get to him, at least so he says. 

But this weekend, we had a guy finally cross the line a bit. The man walked in while I was out of the office and upon seeing my husband standing behind the desk, the first thing he said was "is this place not American-owned?" My husband told him it was, and then the guy said, "So where are you from then?" My husband responded by saying we were both from Maryland. After several very uncomfortable minutes, my husband handed him the key to the most expensive room we've got, for $10 more per night than rack rate. Smiling It definitely made him feel a little better. 

Coming from an area of the country that's very diverse and multicultural, the area we're now in is definitely a little different and many just don't seem to know how to react to someone that looks and sounds different than them. I actually grew up around here, so I sort of knew what to expect, but not my husband. We've had other people say discriminatory things to us on the phone, like "So many of the businesses are getting bought up by the Indians..." They don't want to stay at places owned by Indians. It makes me so sad and hurt to hear some of these things, and I just want to yell at them and say what's the big deal?? If you don't have something nice to say, then why not keep it to yourself! My husband has been here for many years now- nearly 20. This is home for him, and he loves it here. He's actually going to be sitting for his citizenship test soon. It really bugs me though, that even once he can officially say that he is an American, guests will still come in here and look at him suspiciously because he doesn't look like a local. Arrgghh. 

 

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Country Girl's picture
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02/20/2009

MM, sorry to hear about that. My very fair-skinned, blue-eyed daughter has always dated men of middle-eastern or Indian decent. She's received her fair share of negative comments and lots of questions as well. Sometimes ignorance knows no boundaries. 

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06/26/2008

it is not ignorance - it is racism!

 

Arks's picture
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05/22/2010

April wrote:

it is not ignorance - it is racism!

yes

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07/23/2008

Yep! Born in MN, Lived in Australia, and PNW, and now Mid-west for 11 years, and I still get the "your not from around here are you?" or "Where is your accent from?" I DON'T have an accent!!!! 

oh, well! 

Locally, we have been accepted due to our involvement in various local committees and organizations. I think that is key to being accepted in a small town. You have to get involved at a local level. 

Guests are the ones who ask us now 'where ya from?" or, 'are you from around here?' 

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10/07/2008

There is nothing wrong with wanting to support American owned and operated businesses.The method someone goes about saying this is what makes an issue.

I want my hard earned money going to the local economy not overseas, 100% of the time.

Once he gets his citizenship then you can be sure to let everyone know to back off! Until then, unfortunately, it is what it is. I am married to a fairly recent naturalized citizen.

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gillumhouse's picture
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05/22/2008

I warned DH before we moved here to say nothing about anyone as you will not know WHO they are related to AND be prepared for "You ain't from here are you?" the minute he opened hi mouth. Although I am originally from WV (which did grease the wheels of acceptance), I am still an alien because I am not born & bred this town. The surprising thing is not that I was appointed to City Council, but that I was elected to Council 13 months after we moved here. Lost during a Charter change but am now City Clerk. Yes, assimilation is much easier when you sort of look the same.

There are boors  everywhere. I am sorry your DH has had to go through this.

Generic's picture
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02/24/2011

Okay, this happens even if it isn't a matter of colour. Reminds me of someone I met a long time ago. They refused to be given instructions from someone who was younger than them... as if age actually indicated experience in a job. Some people are just stupid. They still go on vacation....

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Joey Camb's picture
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04/02/2010

mind you my neighbor who is 3rd generation UK but is of Indian decent (of the non native american variety) and the crap she has to put up with - things like "we don't want to stay there if it smells like an Indian takeaway" is one particular quote.

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Joey Camb's picture
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04/02/2010

I get asked if I am eastern european a lot and I speak English with virtually no accent. In the UK we are such a mix at the moment with Poles, Lithunians< Romania and currently a lot of Spanish kids as their economy is in the toilet - the hospitality industry would crash without them so its not really an issue - here in my particular town - is an issue in other places. In my town jobs are outstripping people who want to have them.

 

Generic's picture
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02/24/2011

From my perspective, K... I would guarantee you have an accent Smiling

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