Guests From Hell - The Daily Saga

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PhineasSwann's picture
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Stayed tuned for the continuing saga.

DAY 1

Guests arrive. Family of five shown to suite they booked via Boo king. Has queen bed in bedroom, queen sleeper sofa and rollaway. Mother looks perplexed at end of tour. Convinced I've taken her to wrong room. It's the only room I have the accommodates more than 4 people. I double-check and show her boo king reservation. She pulls up her phone. She can't find boo king email, only the TWO confirmations from me showing her the room she's in. No, she insists, she wanted the two-bedroom suite for her family with the fold-out sofa. I have no such room. She shows me picture of my two bedroom suite with a regular sofa (no sleeper) available for her 5 night stay. Only holds 4, so no way she could have booked it online. I break my rules and let her know I can move her there, but her 8-year old son (who she registered on the system as under-6 to avoid paying an extra $20 a night) will have to sleep on sofa. 

My wife and housekeeper scramble to get this room cleaned from an earlier departure. We were going to leave it for the next day, but now have to scramble. Tell family it will be ready in 2 hours and tell them all the things in area they can go see while waiting. They park in living room and start eating free snacks. 

Wife injures herself cleaning bathroom, sliding on slippery floor as she rushes to clean tub. Bruises arm and she's out for the day. I have to take over. Room is ready in just 90 minutes. Not five minutes before I have it ready, guests have left. Now I have to wait for them to come back and check them in. 

DAY 2

Breakfast. Our featured item is only OK for one of her five. Everyone else wants eggs. That's OK. We offer them every day. Just more work. Son asks for un-fancy french toast then proceeds not to eat it, along with the big bowl of fruit loops he puts in his bowl. And people wonder why we charge kids 6 and over the same as adults! 

Mother tells me at breakfast there is no blind in one bedroom, and they had to put up sheet for privacy. There WAS a blind there. While it's possible the previous family damaged it and threw it away and my staff missed it, my money's on the current occupants. I have to order a new blind, so it won't be in until Thursday. PO's made mistake of not having windows all same size so that I could keep extras on hand. 

Family goes to ski mountain. Grandma who speaks no English stays behind. She proceeds to lock the door to the suite's bathroom so she can't get in. Calls her daughter, who calls me to tell me my handyman did it while in room fixing blind. I know better. You're not only stupid people, you're liars. Got it. 

Not to criticize a specific culture, but if this Russian family is representative of their nation's best and brightest, America has nothing to fear from Putin and his minions.

 

Stay tuned. Day 3. Day 4 and Day 5 still to come!

 

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We have a no-kid policy.  No children under the age of 16. For mommies and daddies only.  Has not effected our bottom line, at all. This policy is definitely not for everyone. This is my second BnB.  My first BnB made Fodors travel guide, top 5 in New York State.  No kids was not an issue.

TheBeachHouse's picture
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hello.  

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PhineasSwann's picture
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DAY 5

Anitclimax. Guests checked out with no major drama, only minor things. Usual HM requests over breakfast. Little boy shoved hand into goldfish cracker bin to load up for trip. Then came back after dropping all of them in parking lot and leaving crackers and paper cup strewn about. Reloaded. Both times left back door wide open with -20 temps outside. 

Ah. Gone. Just replaced blind. Normalcy returned for now. 

Morticia's picture
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What is it with the travelers who leave the doors open? Do they have servants at home? Do they only stay at hotels with automatic doors? Are they just THAT self centered?

If it would bother them more, I'd leave the doors open! But, we all know how that goes. (Mice in the rooms, bugs flooring about, more trouble.)

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PhineasSwann's picture
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Morticia wrote:

What is it with the travelers who leave the doors open? Do they have servants at home? Do they only stay at hotels with automatic doors? Are they just THAT self centered

I wish we knew the answer to that question. We have a back door to our dining room, and soooooo many guests just go in and out and leave it wide open. Summer, spring, winter, fall, doesn't matter. How incredibly rude and thoughtless. To do it in fair weather is bad enough, but good god, it was -20F yesterday and we had SEVERAL guests just come on in and leave it wide open! 

Morticia's picture
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PhineasSwann wrote:

Morticia wrote:

What is it with the travelers who leave the doors open? Do they have servants at home? Do they only stay at hotels with automatic doors? Are they just THAT self centered

I wish we knew the answer to that question. We have a back door to our dining room, and soooooo many guests just go in and out and leave it wide open. Summer, spring, winter, fall, doesn't matter. How incredibly rude and thoughtless. To do it in fair weather is bad enough, but good god, it was -20F yesterday and we had SEVERAL guests just come on in and leave it wide open! 

Reminds me of another project we've put off for years - automatic door closer. We didn't used to have a deck outside the door, just the steps, so the door closer would have pushed the elderly down the stairs! Now that we have a big deck, we can add the door closer!

Altho, I remember -20 in Vermont - the door closer used to grab my foot if I wasn't fast enough. The cold and the hydraulics don't get along!

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At that point, isn't it time to get a door closer?

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gillumhouse's picture
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And not just A light - it is EVERY light in the bathroom PLUS the exhaust fan. The drapes are closed so those lights on too.

Generic's picture
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Humidity detecting exhaust fans that have an automatic timer. We actually pulled out some of our exhaust fans to replace with these. So silent guests tell me all the time that they don't work. Except that I turn them on each day after I clean to ensure no smells or humidity.

Silverspoon's picture
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I had seriously considered the humidity detecting fan for bathrooms.  But since we installed the dehumidifying  split ductless AC we have practically eliminated the humidity problem during the summer months when we are busiest.  Now that we are winding down it doesn’t make sense to invest in the automatic fan.  

Glad to hear they work as advertised!

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Generic's picture
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You can also turn them off and on quickly and they are on a timer... to clear smells.

Silverspoon's picture
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We already have the traditional fan/light combo in all bathrooms.  The problem here is the humidity....year 'round.  Guests take 2-3 showers a day during the summer and would rather just wipe the fogged-up mirror with a towel than to turn on the exhaust fan.  There have been many times when I have had to basically dry the walls and windows because they are dripping wet.

Generic's picture
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Hence humidity detecting. They also have a light switch that can be used as humidity detecting and turns on the fan automatically.

Generic's picture
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And those who leave lights on? Light they don't pay electrical bills at home. Sometimes I wonder if I should get occupancy sensors for the rooms. No occupancy, no lights.

PhineasSwann's picture
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DAY 4

Finally got into the room for a room service without someone from the family staying over. 

Found the mini blind. In the closet. Under some personal luggage from the guests. This, coupled with the fact they wouldn't admit that one of their own locked the bathroom door, has us convinced they damaged the blind and lied to us saying it was never there. 

Look, we wouldn't have charged them. They fall down and break all the time. But as Michael says in The Godfather:

"Only don't tell me you're innocent. Because it insults my intelligence and makes me very angry."

Generic's picture
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I gave up on blinds entirely. Blackout drapes. So many people can't figure out how to use blinds. Heck, I have people who can't figure out how to use lamps!

Morticia's picture
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Generic wrote:

I gave up on blinds entirely. Blackout drapes. So many people can't figure out how to use blinds. Heck, I have people who can't figure out how to use lamps!

I should have thought ahead and gotten blackout drapes. The blinds went up to replace the shades that kept falling down. This was back when everything was still lace curtains.

Generic's picture
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You know, getting a set of double curtain rods and blackout drapes might just save your sanity. And winter is a great time for them. Because you can not just install when guests aren't around, you can get the thermal blackout drapes and close them over the winter when the room is unoccupied and save some energy too. Sun Zero has triple lined as well, so an extra layer for sound.... not much of a cut in noise, but let's face it, it's a small extra to be able to mention it when someone complains. Smiling

Morticia's picture
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Too late now, I've already spent hundreds on the new drapes and blinds. I could, if I was ambitious, add blackout lining.

Generic's picture
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If you can, do it. The blinds will drive you nucking futs.

Morticia's picture
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Generic wrote:

If you can, do it. The blinds will drive you nucking futs.

Most of the rooms are pretty dark with just the drapes. The blinds were really for people who want a little light without the neighbors looking in at them.

Morticia's picture
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I think we have the same mini blinds! They are worse in some rooms and on specific windows. 

seashanty's picture
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PhineasSwann wrote:

DAY 4

Finally got into the room for a room service without someone from the family staying over. 

Found the mini blind. In the closet. Under some personal luggage from the guests. This, coupled with the fact they wouldn't admit that one of their own locked the bathroom door, has us convinced they damaged the blind and lied to us saying it was never there. 

I knew it. And I'm going to suggest this scenario - possibly one member of the party broke the blind and hid it without telling all the others. Anyway, do they check out soon??

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Its always the fricking way the one room you havn't cleaned is always the one room you need!

PhineasSwann's picture
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DAY 3

Comparatively quieter day. Grandmother didn't lock herself out of basement, but she did lock the door that leads to the hallway to her suite and another suite my housekeeper was trying to clean. We had to get the key to unlock it. I drove an hour away to get a replacement window shade but will wait until tomorrow to install it.

Family orders three espressos with breakfast every morning. (we have a nice card on the table offering lattes, mochas, espressos, etc. for an uncharge). They're $3 extra apiece. Any bets on whether they'll say they had no idea there was an extra charge when they leave on Saturday?

I tell the missus: "Well, much better day today." 

Her response: "Day ain't over yet." Smiling

 

Morticia's picture
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Maybe they aren't planning on paying.

I'd be making sure they know about those coffee prices. I hate ugly checkout scenes where credit cards don't work, or the guest insists it was all prepaid, or they don't understand what taxes are, or they didn't read the part about the additional service charge.

And, your wife is right - day ain't over yet. Eye-wink

How are they enjoying the frigid weather? It was 30 degrees warmer here yesterday than over by you, and it wasn't warm here!

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seashanty's picture
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 Sorry!

 I suspect a plot for a charge back on this one. One of those ... well, we are going to have to post a negative review because of all these issues ..... while they wait for the refund. ugh.

Perhaps the child broke the shade and they hid it. How did they 'hang' a sheet? What kind of guest doesn't go to the innkeeper and say 'Can you help? There is no shade/curtain in this window.' I call b.s.

 

 

Morticia's picture
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You have to wonder if telling the truth is not 'how things are done'. A lot of people think if they tell the truth they get billed for it. And if they lie you won't have the nerve to challenge them.

Won't she be surprised to find the blinds were not fixed by your handyman while he was busy locking Grandma out of the bathroom.

And - holy cow I am so glad I don't have rooms so big they take 2 people 90 minutes to clean. 

Will tune in tomorrow for the continuing adventures.

TheBeachHouse's picture
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soooooo... what's the plan for breakfast tomorrow?  

Destructive people are the worst.   No grace, no empathy, no amount of caring for your home and hard work.   Part of what makes this job fun is the hospitality - pride of ownership.   But this type of guest doesn't see that.  They only see what they can get from you.

Arks's picture
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Sorry. But I'll sure stay tuned!

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gillumhouse's picture
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So glad the only guests I have coming in tonight are friends. (Sorry that scepter has been passd to you. PLEASE do not send it here.)

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