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mooseberry

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How do you handle friends and family to come to visit?
Especially in high season.....I have a small house myself, so there is not too much room for someone to be my guest. I used to put them up on air mattresses or couch, now some expect to get the "Fancy" rooms and I have to clean up after them.
Depending on who it is, I guess, a friend I haven't seen for a long time, or my inlaws from germany, sure they get pampered...
How dou you all handle this?
Just curious
 

gillumhouse

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My kids? - eh! My cousins & their wives have all gotten the usual guest treatment because each had never been here before and I wanted to show them what I do. When they come back it will be like the kids - eh!
Most of my friends who have come have insisted on paying - so they get the guest treatment until after breakfast ansd then we are just friends again.
 

seashanty

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My kids? - eh! My cousins & their wives have all gotten the usual guest treatment because each had never been here before and I wanted to show them what I do. When they come back it will be like the kids - eh!
Most of my friends who have come have insisted on paying - so they get the guest treatment until after breakfast ansd then we are just friends again..
not much company that way --- i have a huge family --- if more came up here, it would be different. but only two couples have come up.
as it is, i try to give them as nice a room as i can without breaking the bank ... no charge. and my rooms are all so different. they as guests have been awesome, happy just to be here. and if they want to throw on an apron and help out in the kitchen, come on in!
 

gillumhouse

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My kids? - eh! My cousins & their wives have all gotten the usual guest treatment because each had never been here before and I wanted to show them what I do. When they come back it will be like the kids - eh!
Most of my friends who have come have insisted on paying - so they get the guest treatment until after breakfast ansd then we are just friends again..
not much company that way --- i have a huge family --- if more came up here, it would be different. but only two couples have come up.
as it is, i try to give them as nice a room as i can without breaking the bank ... no charge. and my rooms are all so different. they as guests have been awesome, happy just to be here. and if they want to throw on an apron and help out in the kitchen, come on in!
.
Of my 3 siblings and 20 cousins, so far only 1 brother has been here (for 1 night last year) and 8 cousins in the 12 years and 2 of them came as a day trip when one sister came in from CA to visit her sister in PA. The PA cousin has never stayed, just came down to visit when her part of the family came. My cousin is Germany and his brother stayed when they moved their Mom from Arkansas to NH and 4 of the Illinois cousins have come. Germany is planning to come in Aug 2009 and we are working on the when so I can block off the whole house - he is bringing 1 son and d-i-l and 2 granddaughters. He reitterated last Sunday when he called me that he will pay for my ticket to come visit him in Germany so my birthday present to me this year is going to be getting my passport!
 

EmptyNest

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You need to make it perfectly clear that you have guests in high season who are paying. You can put them on an air mattress in YOUR living quarters but that is it. When I had relatives visit..they paid me if they used a guest room. Otherwise, the got the sleep sofa in the office:)
 

Morticia

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In season no one comes to visit without paying. Everyone understands this. None of my family want me moving back in with them because I couldn't make enough money at this.
 

Samster

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Our son gets the sleep sofa in the den if he comes to visit if we have guests, otherwise he gets his old room (the one with the detached bath). Anyone else gets a room. Close friends are one thing...they usually get to stay gratis. Their extended family pays a discounted price.
 

YellowSocks

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So far no one's come when we were full. For our guests who came at the beginning of July I originally set apart the smallest bedroom for them, but as we weren't full that weekend they ended up each in their own bed. My inlaws won't stay here, it appears... When dh's grandparents were in town they insisted on staying at the Cheapo Inn, and now they've got a house when my mil came (and fil next month comes) they stay with them instead of me.
On a truly peak weekend... no way any family or friend is in a guest room, but we have a very comfy sofa in our very trashed family room...
=)
Kk.
 

mooseberry

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Thanks for the answers. Pretty much what I am doing, depending on who and when.
I always do have an airmattress in the livingroom....and it is compfy....
 

JunieBJones (JBJ)

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Well Mooseberry you are in a diff situation than most of us. Your high season might be the only season your family and friends would come to visit. Weather wise.
AND of course add to that it is your HIGH SEASON so you are BUSY, EXHAUSTED and WORKIN YER BUNS OFF. So having people on an airmattress in your living room just adds to the stress.
But having someone come from so far away obv costs THEM $$ to get to you, so I would hope they can make arrangements ahead of time.
 

Morticia

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Well Mooseberry you are in a diff situation than most of us. Your high season might be the only season your family and friends would come to visit. Weather wise.
AND of course add to that it is your HIGH SEASON so you are BUSY, EXHAUSTED and WORKIN YER BUNS OFF. So having people on an airmattress in your living room just adds to the stress.
But having someone come from so far away obv costs THEM $$ to get to you, so I would hope they can make arrangements ahead of time..
JunieBJones (JBJ) said:
AND of course add to that it is your HIGH SEASON so you are BUSY, EXHAUSTED and WORKIN YER BUNS OFF. So having people on an airmattress in your living room just adds to the stress.
This is why when family insists on visiting during peak season we ask them to stay elsewhere. Parents never get asked to stay elsewhere (but THEY volunteer!), siblings always.
 

swirt

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Timing is always the issue for us. We fill up typically a few months ahead of time, but friends or family never give that much warning. So there is never even a choice to let them stay in a guestroom. We do have an extra bedroom in our house that is separate from paying guests so we can put them up there. But it is still a squeeze and they have to essentially go into "hiding" while we are serving breakfast (we only have room for 6 at the breakfast table).
Once we had my cousin from Switzerland and her husband and three kids stay with us. It was tight, they hid out in the basement with the kids until breakfast was done. They seemed to understand, but in my head all I keep running back to is ..oh man I made my cousin and family hide in the basement. I still feel guilty about it.
This is one of the issues that always pops into my mind as a warning when an aspiring comes by the forum and dreamily says they are looking forward to being an innkeeper so they can spend more time with family. We've never been able to make it work that way for us anyway. :(
 

happyjacks

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Well Mooseberry you are in a diff situation than most of us. Your high season might be the only season your family and friends would come to visit. Weather wise.
AND of course add to that it is your HIGH SEASON so you are BUSY, EXHAUSTED and WORKIN YER BUNS OFF. So having people on an airmattress in your living room just adds to the stress.
But having someone come from so far away obv costs THEM $$ to get to you, so I would hope they can make arrangements ahead of time..
JunieBJones (JBJ) said:
AND of course add to that it is your HIGH SEASON so you are BUSY, EXHAUSTED and WORKIN YER BUNS OFF. So having people on an airmattress in your living room just adds to the stress.
This is why when family insists on visiting during peak season we ask them to stay elsewhere. Parents never get asked to stay elsewhere (but THEY volunteer!), siblings always.
.
Hubby's parents have been wanting to come for a visit, so his sister & BIL planned their annual rent-a-cottage-on-the-lake week at one of the lakes near our town, just a 30 minute drive from here. So the whole family came here for a short afternoon visit (no meals, between brekkie & check-in) and we made it over to the cottage a couple times for visits too. Best way to do it. The ONLY way we could do it, really, in high season. Especially since my MIL likes to reorganize my kitchen cupboards (she had a blast doing that at the cottage, apparently).
Otherwise, parents and sibs can stay free in the room in the main house. Other family members and friends get a discount if it's not a peak weekend. They also have to understand that I'm working and won't be able to sit and chat all day or go to the beach or sightseeing with them.
They don't always realise that coming to visit me on a weekend would be like me popping into their office on a Tuesday afternoon for a nice long chat over a glass of wine. Uh, no.
 

Morticia

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Timing is always the issue for us. We fill up typically a few months ahead of time, but friends or family never give that much warning. So there is never even a choice to let them stay in a guestroom. We do have an extra bedroom in our house that is separate from paying guests so we can put them up there. But it is still a squeeze and they have to essentially go into "hiding" while we are serving breakfast (we only have room for 6 at the breakfast table).
Once we had my cousin from Switzerland and her husband and three kids stay with us. It was tight, they hid out in the basement with the kids until breakfast was done. They seemed to understand, but in my head all I keep running back to is ..oh man I made my cousin and family hide in the basement. I still feel guilty about it.
This is one of the issues that always pops into my mind as a warning when an aspiring comes by the forum and dreamily says they are looking forward to being an innkeeper so they can spend more time with family. We've never been able to make it work that way for us anyway. :(.
swirt said:
Timing is always the issue for us. We fill up typically a few months ahead of time, but friends or family never give that much warning. So there is never even a choice to let them stay in a guestroom. We do have an extra bedroom in our house that is separate from paying guests so we can put them up there. But it is still a squeeze and they have to essentially go into "hiding" while we are serving breakfast (we only have room for 6 at the breakfast table).
Once we had my cousin from Switzerland and her husband and three kids stay with us. It was tight, they hid out in the basement with the kids until breakfast was done. They seemed to understand, but in my head all I keep running back to is ..oh man I made my cousin and family hide in the basement. I still feel guilty about it.
This is one of the issues that always pops into my mind as a warning when an aspiring comes by the forum and dreamily says they are looking forward to being an innkeeper so they can spend more time with family. We've never been able to make it work that way for us anyway. :(
My family is hysterical to watch...they walk thru the inn, glance in at the guests in the dining room, wave hi and keep going. Or they will stand at the end of the hallway trying to catch my eye. But they all eat in my personal dining room. They don't eat with the guests. Except the grandkids. I want to spend time with them so I let them eat in the dining room with the guests as long as they sit quietly. They LOVE getting the little boxes of cereal and watching grandpa cook.
 

muirford

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Timing is always the issue for us. We fill up typically a few months ahead of time, but friends or family never give that much warning. So there is never even a choice to let them stay in a guestroom. We do have an extra bedroom in our house that is separate from paying guests so we can put them up there. But it is still a squeeze and they have to essentially go into "hiding" while we are serving breakfast (we only have room for 6 at the breakfast table).
Once we had my cousin from Switzerland and her husband and three kids stay with us. It was tight, they hid out in the basement with the kids until breakfast was done. They seemed to understand, but in my head all I keep running back to is ..oh man I made my cousin and family hide in the basement. I still feel guilty about it.
This is one of the issues that always pops into my mind as a warning when an aspiring comes by the forum and dreamily says they are looking forward to being an innkeeper so they can spend more time with family. We've never been able to make it work that way for us anyway. :(.
swirt said:
Timing is always the issue for us. We fill up typically a few months ahead of time, but friends or family never give that much warning. So there is never even a choice to let them stay in a guestroom. We do have an extra bedroom in our house that is separate from paying guests so we can put them up there. But it is still a squeeze and they have to essentially go into "hiding" while we are serving breakfast (we only have room for 6 at the breakfast table).
Once we had my cousin from Switzerland and her husband and three kids stay with us. It was tight, they hid out in the basement with the kids until breakfast was done. They seemed to understand, but in my head all I keep running back to is ..oh man I made my cousin and family hide in the basement. I still feel guilty about it.
This is one of the issues that always pops into my mind as a warning when an aspiring comes by the forum and dreamily says they are looking forward to being an innkeeper so they can spend more time with family. We've never been able to make it work that way for us anyway. :(
My family is hysterical to watch...they walk thru the inn, glance in at the guests in the dining room, wave hi and keep going. Or they will stand at the end of the hallway trying to catch my eye. But they all eat in my personal dining room. They don't eat with the guests. Except the grandkids. I want to spend time with them so I let them eat in the dining room with the guests as long as they sit quietly. They LOVE getting the little boxes of cereal and watching grandpa cook.
.
My dad is like that - he and my stepmother stay in B&Bs all the time, but he won't stay here if we have other guests at the Inn. So he is always intruding on nights I have blocked off to get a break. I don't know what his issue is.
The last time the grandkids visited they stayed at the Clarion - trust me, everyone was happier. They had a pool and a tv, we had other guests already booked. There are four of them - all boys, all under age 9. No way in heck would I inflict that on anyone else.
 

EmptyNest

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You may think it is nice and your guests may be acting politely, but if I was a guest and a 5 month old was sititng eating next to me...I would be upset. I am a paying guest, I do not want to entertain your children / grandchildren nor be entertained by them ..Sorry, but don't assume your guests are enjoying it.
 

mooseberry

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You may think it is nice and your guests may be acting politely, but if I was a guest and a 5 month old was sititng eating next to me...I would be upset. I am a paying guest, I do not want to entertain your children / grandchildren nor be entertained by them ..Sorry, but don't assume your guests are enjoying it..
catlady said:
You may think it is nice and your guests may be acting politely, but if I was a guest and a 5 month old was sititng eating next to me...I would be upset. I am a paying guest, I do not want to entertain your children / grandchildren nor be entertained by them ..Sorry, but don't assume your guests are enjoying it.
OK, a little more detail..the 5 mo old is not sitting at the table, she is merely her sometimes in the PM, ( never at breakfast time) and when we sit on the porch when guests arrive, they love to talk to her. I do not push her on anyone. It is their choice.
My son also does not sit and have breakfast with my guests, but sometimes helps me serve and when guests like to start a conversation with him, they are more then welcome to. Again, I do not push him on the guests, their choice.
I am usually a short writer, but I guess if I would write my comments in more detail, misunderstandings like this one would not happen.
 

mooseberry

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Timing is always the issue for us. We fill up typically a few months ahead of time, but friends or family never give that much warning. So there is never even a choice to let them stay in a guestroom. We do have an extra bedroom in our house that is separate from paying guests so we can put them up there. But it is still a squeeze and they have to essentially go into "hiding" while we are serving breakfast (we only have room for 6 at the breakfast table).
Once we had my cousin from Switzerland and her husband and three kids stay with us. It was tight, they hid out in the basement with the kids until breakfast was done. They seemed to understand, but in my head all I keep running back to is ..oh man I made my cousin and family hide in the basement. I still feel guilty about it.
This is one of the issues that always pops into my mind as a warning when an aspiring comes by the forum and dreamily says they are looking forward to being an innkeeper so they can spend more time with family. We've never been able to make it work that way for us anyway. :(.
swirt said:
Timing is always the issue for us. We fill up typically a few months ahead of time, but friends or family never give that much warning. So there is never even a choice to let them stay in a guestroom. We do have an extra bedroom in our house that is separate from paying guests so we can put them up there. But it is still a squeeze and they have to essentially go into "hiding" while we are serving breakfast (we only have room for 6 at the breakfast table).
Once we had my cousin from Switzerland and her husband and three kids stay with us. It was tight, they hid out in the basement with the kids until breakfast was done. They seemed to understand, but in my head all I keep running back to is ..oh man I made my cousin and family hide in the basement. I still feel guilty about it.
This is one of the issues that always pops into my mind as a warning when an aspiring comes by the forum and dreamily says they are looking forward to being an innkeeper so they can spend more time with family. We've never been able to make it work that way for us anyway. :(
My family is hysterical to watch...they walk thru the inn, glance in at the guests in the dining room, wave hi and keep going. Or they will stand at the end of the hallway trying to catch my eye. But they all eat in my personal dining room. They don't eat with the guests. Except the grandkids. I want to spend time with them so I let them eat in the dining room with the guests as long as they sit quietly. They LOVE getting the little boxes of cereal and watching grandpa cook.
.
Bree, I think it is very nice of you to have the grandkids eat with guests. My guest so far all enjoyed my little 5 month old grand daughter, and my 14 year old son gets to travel around the world trough other peoples eyes. Depending on the age, they can actually learn from guests....yesterday I had an retired sience professor from the university...very interesting conversation...
 

YellowSocks

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You may think it is nice and your guests may be acting politely, but if I was a guest and a 5 month old was sititng eating next to me...I would be upset. I am a paying guest, I do not want to entertain your children / grandchildren nor be entertained by them ..Sorry, but don't assume your guests are enjoying it..
catlady said:
You may think it is nice and your guests may be acting politely, but if I was a guest and a 5 month old was sititng eating next to me...I would be upset. I am a paying guest, I do not want to entertain your children / grandchildren nor be entertained by them ..Sorry, but don't assume your guests are enjoying it.
OK, a little more detail..the 5 mo old is not sitting at the table, she is merely her sometimes in the PM, ( never at breakfast time) and when we sit on the porch when guests arrive, they love to talk to her. I do not push her on anyone. It is their choice.
My son also does not sit and have breakfast with my guests, but sometimes helps me serve and when guests like to start a conversation with him, they are more then welcome to. Again, I do not push him on the guests, their choice.
I am usually a short writer, but I guess if I would write my comments in more detail, misunderstandings like this one would not happen.
.
Some people don't like kids. We are always trying to be sensitive to that fact when our kids interact with guests. So far, however, people have been more than "polite." They have brought them gifts, asked where they are when they're not around, and gone out of their way to interact with them. That's because it's also true that many people do like kids, especially other people's well-behaved kids that they don't have to reprimand or deal with for any extended period of time.
But, like I said, we try to be sensitive to how a guest feels and have the kids interact less rather than more with the guests. We're also very up front about their presence on our website (and on the phone) so that people who really don't like kids can self select and stay at the wonderful B&B only 2-1/2 miles away.
I'm sure it's the same with animals... some love them, some hate them, some are ambivalent, but it's always nice to know ahead about their presence.
=)
Kk.
 

JunieBJones (JBJ)

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Case in point. Our new neighbors. I went over with a vase of flowers and a card welcoming them. They welcomed me back by having me stand there for 10 minutes with my fingers in my ears as their dog barked incessantly echoeing in this little entry.
I left and shook my head. UN-BE-LIEVABLE! What the heck was that? What a horrible nasty creature (you can read into who I meant by that).
Even a "show" of making the dog behave or obey would be appreciated. Nope, nada. She stood there and allowed it to happen. Didn't chastise, didn't put it in the other room. The dog was a complete terror. I have given MY dog permission to go and tear it up! I told her noone will really care. In fact she will be given lots of extra doggie treats. LOL!
 
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