Funny guest comments/questions about your area or B&B

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JBloggs

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Feel free to add actual questions or statements from guests or callers re your area or B&B. I will begin with a couple of mine:
"What will the weather be like on Jan 7th?" (It was August when this question was asked)
"When will the leaves be in their peak?"
"Why did you send me to an Italian restaurant run by Egyptians"
"Why didn't you tell us the restaurant had smokers in it?"
"Why don't you have a room with three beds?"
"Does the cottage have a bathroom?"
"Is there any other way in here besides the front door?"
"Can we just come in through your kitchen instead of the front door?"
"How do we find the front door?"
 
Could not resist responding to this link.
Here are just a few from from this past summer!
‘What time will the whales be coming by?’
‘When I take a whale watching tour, can I pet the whales?’
‘How high above sea level are you?’ (we are beach front!)
‘What is the name of that lake?’ (we are on the ocean)
‘Are those real humming birds?’
‘What are kilometers?’
‘Why does your money have a lady on it, who is she?’
‘Do you think we’ll see some bears?’ (some trees in our neighborhood)
‘Do we have to leave the B&B for the day, them come back at check-in?’
‘Do we get to keep the beaver bear in the room?’ (room decor)
‘Do we have to get dressed when we come for breakfast?’
'Why is it going to rain today?'
'What will the weather be like when we get there?' (phone call)
'What type of power do you have?' (phone call)
 
Could not resist responding to this link.
Here are just a few from from this past summer!
‘What time will the whales be coming by?’
‘When I take a whale watching tour, can I pet the whales?’
‘How high above sea level are you?’ (we are beach front!)
‘What is the name of that lake?’ (we are on the ocean)
‘Are those real humming birds?’
‘What are kilometers?’
‘Why does your money have a lady on it, who is she?’
‘Do you think we’ll see some bears?’ (some trees in our neighborhood)
‘Do we have to leave the B&B for the day, them come back at check-in?’
‘Do we get to keep the beaver bear in the room?’ (room decor)
‘Do we have to get dressed when we come for breakfast?’
'Why is it going to rain today?'
'What will the weather be like when we get there?' (phone call)
'What type of power do you have?' (phone call).
‘How high above sea level are you?’ (we are beach front!)
‘What is the name of that lake?’ (we are on the ocean)
‘What are kilometers?’
Oof...Do you run a special for stupid people? ;)
 
Could not resist responding to this link.
Here are just a few from from this past summer!
‘What time will the whales be coming by?’
‘When I take a whale watching tour, can I pet the whales?’
‘How high above sea level are you?’ (we are beach front!)
‘What is the name of that lake?’ (we are on the ocean)
‘Are those real humming birds?’
‘What are kilometers?’
‘Why does your money have a lady on it, who is she?’
‘Do you think we’ll see some bears?’ (some trees in our neighborhood)
‘Do we have to leave the B&B for the day, them come back at check-in?’
‘Do we get to keep the beaver bear in the room?’ (room decor)
‘Do we have to get dressed when we come for breakfast?’
'Why is it going to rain today?'
'What will the weather be like when we get there?' (phone call)
'What type of power do you have?' (phone call).
‘How high above sea level are you?’ (we are beach front!)
‘What is the name of that lake?’ (we are on the ocean)
‘What are kilometers?’
Oof...Do you run a special for stupid people? ;)
.
I've decided ~ 'common sense is NOT common :)
 
"We just drove past a lot of shops down the street, can we walk to them?"
"Do we have to use the stairs to get to our room?"
"Where's the elevator?"
(Looking at 4 tables set with silverware) "Is this where we eat?"
(After being shown how to operate the keypad, with full instructions including, "There is no key for this door.") "Do we use this key to get in the door?"
"Is that the ocean?" (Looking at roof of neighbor's shed.)
Ditto the ones about when can the whales been seen and what temp will it be on x date.
 
All of the above(almost) but my favorite is" whats the view out the window" and I say" the back yard". But being a Far Side fan running through my mind is...
wink_smile.gif
Oh, lovely view of the town dump on the left side, state prison yard just beyond my small back yard, right side is a neighbor who collects junk tires and across the sreet is the fire house.Fresh air and serene here.Mary in Bridgewater.
 
I just got this email inquiry, just thought the last part was funny:
Hi there,
What are your rates and what do you have available for the nights of Oct. 23 and 24 for a senior couple?
Thanks, John K.

 
I just got this email inquiry, just thought the last part was funny:
Hi there,
What are your rates and what do you have available for the nights of Oct. 23 and 24 for a senior couple?
Thanks, John K.

.
Hey There
I am from the rock band "Punish the Innocent". There are twelve of us. We'll stay in Natalie's room. The picture doesn't show a fridge. Can we borrow a large cooler for our beer. Can you also direct us to the local hot spots so we can pick up girls or can you provide.
Thank You
Spike the Hammer
Bass Player
"Punish the Innocent"
This was one of our first requests......Turned out to be from one of our "demented' friends
Bill
 
Our most frequently 'you knucklehead' question that we get asked is:
"Does your B&B serve breakfast?"
My wife thought that sometime when we get asked that, just to see what response we would get, we should tell people, 'No, we dont serve breakfast, but your welcome to walk to the McDonalds down the street.'
We also get asked if they need to ring the doorbell each time before they come into the house. Must be a midwest America thing...I have never heard of anthing like this before we moved to Missouri.
But in 4 years of B&B experience, this next one is the most dumbest of all, and I hope that I never have 'a moment' and snap back at the person. But just 3 weeks ago (and probably for the 3rd time since ownership, each by a differnt guest and all of which were GROWN ADULTS...I think) after I have shown the guest to their room, I have been asked if there is a curfew?
A CURFEW!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Now, please forgive me if there are those out there who run a B&B and have a curfew, but give me a BREAK! And its not like my wife or I stay up till all our guests arrive home...Each guest room comes with two sets of key rings and on each set is a key to their room and a key to the entry of our home so they can come and go as they please. (We have commerical locks on our doors, so they lock as soon as you pull the door shut.) All we ask is that should a guest wish to come in late (10 pm or later) to please be courteous of the other guests while walking through the house who might be sleeping.
Should a time come when I just loose it, at this point my reponse will be one of two answers:
1. Well, there may be...have you graduated from Junior High School yet?
2. Just a moment, let me call your MOMMY & DADDY and ask them what time I should make sure you return by each night.
~Brian
 
"Is dinner included?"
(My reply - bed and BREAKFAST) They say "Well we were just wondering"
 
Our most frequently 'you knucklehead' question that we get asked is:
"Does your B&B serve breakfast?"
My wife thought that sometime when we get asked that, just to see what response we would get, we should tell people, 'No, we dont serve breakfast, but your welcome to walk to the McDonalds down the street.'
We also get asked if they need to ring the doorbell each time before they come into the house. Must be a midwest America thing...I have never heard of anthing like this before we moved to Missouri.
But in 4 years of B&B experience, this next one is the most dumbest of all, and I hope that I never have 'a moment' and snap back at the person. But just 3 weeks ago (and probably for the 3rd time since ownership, each by a differnt guest and all of which were GROWN ADULTS...I think) after I have shown the guest to their room, I have been asked if there is a curfew?
A CURFEW!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Now, please forgive me if there are those out there who run a B&B and have a curfew, but give me a BREAK! And its not like my wife or I stay up till all our guests arrive home...Each guest room comes with two sets of key rings and on each set is a key to their room and a key to the entry of our home so they can come and go as they please. (We have commerical locks on our doors, so they lock as soon as you pull the door shut.) All we ask is that should a guest wish to come in late (10 pm or later) to please be courteous of the other guests while walking through the house who might be sleeping.
Should a time come when I just loose it, at this point my reponse will be one of two answers:
1. Well, there may be...have you graduated from Junior High School yet?
2. Just a moment, let me call your MOMMY & DADDY and ask them what time I should make sure you return by each night.
~Brian.
Brian I am asked that as well (Curfew) and I NOW ask them, "Have you really experienced that at another B&B?"
YES! They always tell me and where it was they experienced it, and worse was the innkeeper would WAIT UP FOR THEM. YUK. A few tell me the innkeeper tells them the lights will go out at 10pm and the doors all locked.
cry_smile.gif

 
Our most frequently 'you knucklehead' question that we get asked is:
"Does your B&B serve breakfast?"
My wife thought that sometime when we get asked that, just to see what response we would get, we should tell people, 'No, we dont serve breakfast, but your welcome to walk to the McDonalds down the street.'
We also get asked if they need to ring the doorbell each time before they come into the house. Must be a midwest America thing...I have never heard of anthing like this before we moved to Missouri.
But in 4 years of B&B experience, this next one is the most dumbest of all, and I hope that I never have 'a moment' and snap back at the person. But just 3 weeks ago (and probably for the 3rd time since ownership, each by a differnt guest and all of which were GROWN ADULTS...I think) after I have shown the guest to their room, I have been asked if there is a curfew?
A CURFEW!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Now, please forgive me if there are those out there who run a B&B and have a curfew, but give me a BREAK! And its not like my wife or I stay up till all our guests arrive home...Each guest room comes with two sets of key rings and on each set is a key to their room and a key to the entry of our home so they can come and go as they please. (We have commerical locks on our doors, so they lock as soon as you pull the door shut.) All we ask is that should a guest wish to come in late (10 pm or later) to please be courteous of the other guests while walking through the house who might be sleeping.
Should a time come when I just loose it, at this point my reponse will be one of two answers:
1. Well, there may be...have you graduated from Junior High School yet?
2. Just a moment, let me call your MOMMY & DADDY and ask them what time I should make sure you return by each night.
~Brian.
Big Bri said:
Our most frequently 'you knucklehead' question that we get asked is:
"Does your B&B serve breakfast?"
My wife thought that sometime when we get asked that, just to see what response we would get, we should tell people, 'No, we dont serve breakfast, but your welcome to walk to the McDonalds down the street.'
We also get asked if they need to ring the doorbell each time before they come into the house. Must be a midwest America thing...I have never heard of anthing like this before we moved to Missouri.
But in 4 years of B&B experience, this next one is the most dumbest of all, and I hope that I never have 'a moment' and snap back at the person. But just 3 weeks ago (and probably for the 3rd time since ownership, each by a differnt guest and all of which were GROWN ADULTS...I think) after I have shown the guest to their room, I have been asked if there is a curfew?
A CURFEW!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Now, please forgive me if there are those out there who run a B&B and have a curfew, but give me a BREAK! And its not like my wife or I stay up till all our guests arrive home...Each guest room comes with two sets of key rings and on each set is a key to their room and a key to the entry of our home so they can come and go as they please. (We have commerical locks on our doors, so they lock as soon as you pull the door shut.) All we ask is that should a guest wish to come in late (10 pm or later) to please be courteous of the other guests while walking through the house who might be sleeping.
Should a time come when I just loose it, at this point my reponse will be one of two answers:
1. Well, there may be...have you graduated from Junior High School yet?
2. Just a moment, let me call your MOMMY & DADDY and ask them what time I should make sure you return by each night.
~Brian
Oh, we've been asked about a curfew. There are some B & B's that do have one. I tell them "You have your key and I am are not your mother" (with a laugh of course).
 
Our most frequently 'you knucklehead' question that we get asked is:
"Does your B&B serve breakfast?"
My wife thought that sometime when we get asked that, just to see what response we would get, we should tell people, 'No, we dont serve breakfast, but your welcome to walk to the McDonalds down the street.'
We also get asked if they need to ring the doorbell each time before they come into the house. Must be a midwest America thing...I have never heard of anthing like this before we moved to Missouri.
But in 4 years of B&B experience, this next one is the most dumbest of all, and I hope that I never have 'a moment' and snap back at the person. But just 3 weeks ago (and probably for the 3rd time since ownership, each by a differnt guest and all of which were GROWN ADULTS...I think) after I have shown the guest to their room, I have been asked if there is a curfew?
A CURFEW!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Now, please forgive me if there are those out there who run a B&B and have a curfew, but give me a BREAK! And its not like my wife or I stay up till all our guests arrive home...Each guest room comes with two sets of key rings and on each set is a key to their room and a key to the entry of our home so they can come and go as they please. (We have commerical locks on our doors, so they lock as soon as you pull the door shut.) All we ask is that should a guest wish to come in late (10 pm or later) to please be courteous of the other guests while walking through the house who might be sleeping.
Should a time come when I just loose it, at this point my reponse will be one of two answers:
1. Well, there may be...have you graduated from Junior High School yet?
2. Just a moment, let me call your MOMMY & DADDY and ask them what time I should make sure you return by each night.
~Brian.
I get asked so often about "What time do we have to be in?" that I did not think of it for this thread. I look at them and answer with a smile, "Well, you look like an adult and I don't think you need a curfew." or "I think you can handle staying out as late as you want."
I do sort of wait up to lock up, but we are usually up until midnight anyway so not really. It get in the house key is for the kitchen (as a just in case something comes up) but I really do not want it used. A keypad would not look the way I want on my 1912 door with its beveled glass. The key to the front door is a skeleton key and we never use it. There is a button that locks the door on the outside BUT from the inside the knob turns and the door opens. I like that - in an emergency guests can get out but no one can get in.
 
Our most frequently 'you knucklehead' question that we get asked is:
"Does your B&B serve breakfast?"
My wife thought that sometime when we get asked that, just to see what response we would get, we should tell people, 'No, we dont serve breakfast, but your welcome to walk to the McDonalds down the street.'
We also get asked if they need to ring the doorbell each time before they come into the house. Must be a midwest America thing...I have never heard of anthing like this before we moved to Missouri.
But in 4 years of B&B experience, this next one is the most dumbest of all, and I hope that I never have 'a moment' and snap back at the person. But just 3 weeks ago (and probably for the 3rd time since ownership, each by a differnt guest and all of which were GROWN ADULTS...I think) after I have shown the guest to their room, I have been asked if there is a curfew?
A CURFEW!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Now, please forgive me if there are those out there who run a B&B and have a curfew, but give me a BREAK! And its not like my wife or I stay up till all our guests arrive home...Each guest room comes with two sets of key rings and on each set is a key to their room and a key to the entry of our home so they can come and go as they please. (We have commerical locks on our doors, so they lock as soon as you pull the door shut.) All we ask is that should a guest wish to come in late (10 pm or later) to please be courteous of the other guests while walking through the house who might be sleeping.
Should a time come when I just loose it, at this point my reponse will be one of two answers:
1. Well, there may be...have you graduated from Junior High School yet?
2. Just a moment, let me call your MOMMY & DADDY and ask them what time I should make sure you return by each night.
~Brian.
I get asked so often about "What time do we have to be in?" that I did not think of it for this thread. I look at them and answer with a smile, "Well, you look like an adult and I don't think you need a curfew." or "I think you can handle staying out as late as you want."
I do sort of wait up to lock up, but we are usually up until midnight anyway so not really. It get in the house key is for the kitchen (as a just in case something comes up) but I really do not want it used. A keypad would not look the way I want on my 1912 door with its beveled glass. The key to the front door is a skeleton key and we never use it. There is a button that locks the door on the outside BUT from the inside the knob turns and the door opens. I like that - in an emergency guests can get out but no one can get in.
.
gillumhouse said:
There is a button that locks the door on the outside BUT from the inside the knob turns and the door opens. I like that - in an emergency guests can get out but no one can get in.
Our front door lock works that way too. They can get out but need a key to get in.
Just got a call with another interesting question. "Can you tell me where the bad areas of New Haven are"?. I replied that it would easier to show them on a map once they get here the areas that are a little sketchy. She said "Well our friends are staying at the such in such hotel. I replied "yes that is at the fringes of a sketchy area but our area has professors and vice presidents of the university living up the street and many historic 6,000 square foot homes."
 
My most asked question occurs when I have made the English muffin bread. There is a tentative "Can we have the rest of our loaves of bread?"
 
Could not resist responding to this link.
Here are just a few from from this past summer!
‘What time will the whales be coming by?’
‘When I take a whale watching tour, can I pet the whales?’
‘How high above sea level are you?’ (we are beach front!)
‘What is the name of that lake?’ (we are on the ocean)
‘Are those real humming birds?’
‘What are kilometers?’
‘Why does your money have a lady on it, who is she?’
‘Do you think we’ll see some bears?’ (some trees in our neighborhood)
‘Do we have to leave the B&B for the day, them come back at check-in?’
‘Do we get to keep the beaver bear in the room?’ (room decor)
‘Do we have to get dressed when we come for breakfast?’
'Why is it going to rain today?'
'What will the weather be like when we get there?' (phone call)
'What type of power do you have?' (phone call).
inn_keeper said:
‘Why does your money have a lady on it, who is she?’
I've always heard that was Barbara Bush.
 
on two seperate occasions, during the process of making the reservation, the person asked "now, if i get in a car accident on the way to your inn and die, will i get my deposit refunded?" the first time i was so surprised that someone asked such a thing and the second time i was so surprised because i couldn't believe another person was asking the question.
i guess for me, the nonrefund of my deposit would not be my biggest disappointment. call me crazy but i think that is a ridiculous thing to ask. i just want to say to them "stop & think about what you just said"
edited to say
: ironically enough, the first p[erson that asked me that, did get in a n accident on his way here. well, not an accident but he was going too fast, it was snowing and the road was just slippery enough, tht he passed another car & ended up spinning off the road down in the puckerbrush. hmm....self fulfilling prophecy?
 
I tell them downtown is a few blocks away - "Can we walk there?"
Phone call recently: "How do we get there from here?" Duh...where are YOU now?
On the tour, "All the sodas and bottled water are 'on the house'. Guests asks: "How much are the sodas?"
"Is the river we crossed a couple of blocks away the closest river?
"Can we sit out on this porch (in the living room, on the other porch)?"
"Do you serve breakfast?" - only been asked a couple of times, but that's my favorite!
 
on two seperate occasions, during the process of making the reservation, the person asked "now, if i get in a car accident on the way to your inn and die, will i get my deposit refunded?" the first time i was so surprised that someone asked such a thing and the second time i was so surprised because i couldn't believe another person was asking the question.
i guess for me, the nonrefund of my deposit would not be my biggest disappointment. call me crazy but i think that is a ridiculous thing to ask. i just want to say to them "stop & think about what you just said"
edited to say
: ironically enough, the first p[erson that asked me that, did get in a n accident on his way here. well, not an accident but he was going too fast, it was snowing and the road was just slippery enough, tht he passed another car & ended up spinning off the road down in the puckerbrush. hmm....self fulfilling prophecy?.
We don't take deposits, but I get similar questions about how serious the cancellation policy is:
"What if someone dies and we have to go the funeral?"
"What if our car breaks down and we can't get there?"
"What if we get sick?"
"What if the wedding gets called off?"
And I can hear the spouse in the background, "Tell them so and so is sick so we might have to cancel.' It goes on and on.
 
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