Making The Decision

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All of these comments help. Especially the thought of not really having a plan in place. When I bought this place, I had no intention of opening a B&B. I lived half the country away, in a government job with all the benefits, seniority, lots of friends, and a house that was paid off (at the age of 35!). I was doing amazingly well for myself, and I guess I thought I'd just buy this 4000 square foot 120 year old monster of a neglected house and flip it! Or something! No intentions on living in it.

After I signed the closing papers, life at my old job went downhill. I started hating it - was not happy. I was not happy with the area that I was living (beautiful, but too many people - Puget Sound, WA), and I just wanted a change. A big change it was. A complete change of careers, climate, house, friends, attitude, health. Things just came together. My faith tells me God sent me here, even though I had no freaking clue what I was doing. And He has led me the entire time. I'm very happy with the person I've become and what I've done for the house, but mostly for the people that come through the doors. I know I make a difference in peoples' lives. I see it in their face, I hear it in their voices, I receive it in the forms of gifts and hugs and tips and dinner invitations and set ups with their single sons (hahah). But I'm ready for the next step, and I'm just scared shitless that I'm not doing the right thing!

Alot of times in my life, I've done things that I wasn't sure about, didn't feel completely comfortable with...and it has almost always worked out to my advantage. I have amazing angels that watch over me, I think :)

So I've obviously babbled. As you all know, it's not just a financial and lifestyle decision. It's very emotional, and I think I just have to adjust to the fact that I may not be COMPLETELY okay with this decision. But I need to do it. I hear myself in my head and feel my facial expressions when dealing with someone different that checks in, or a food allergy, or someone that shuts the door too hard, or speaks too loudly, or comes to breakfast late. It's just....people. They're all different, and that's what makes the world an interesting place, isn't it? When I start getting all riled up about these little things, I think it's time.

Wow...ok...now I'm done. Thanks for hanging in there with me, if you made it this far!.
Hey, Puget Sound WA???? I'm from Bremerton!!! Why haven't I picked up on you being from the area before???
I agree with Gillum! sometimes you need to 'schedule' breaks... and yes, it does take a while to sell... We've been up for sale now for a year.
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I lived in Tacoma for about 15 years before moving to Galveston, TX. Don't miss it a bit. Too many people!
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BananaE29 said:
I lived in Tacoma for about 15 years before moving to Galveston, TX. Don't miss it a bit. Too many people!
The Tacoma Aroma...I was just there in Sept. I sat on the new nalley valley viaduct with the merging of I-5 and HWY 16 at 5am in the morning - but I had the carpool lane and was buzzing past at the end of Fife giving people the happy hand... :)
This after paying $6 to cross the new bridge (which was under construction when I lived there) and...HWY 16 has traffic all day long now on the Peninsula...I couldn't get over it.
and this:
Hwy16.jpg

the old constant drizzle, lack of sun, dampness...
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It takes...oh...15 minutes (at the most) after getting in my rental car at the airport to have things flying out of my mouth that I haven't said in months (even under my breath at guests!). I get severe road rage there - people are so rude and actually go out of their way to avoid letting you merge.

Even on a "mountain" day, when the sun comes out and you can clearly see Mt Rainier...it's not worth the stress. The only thing I truly miss is my friends and a Starbucks (or other locally owned espresso shop) on every corner :)
 
Wow, from the sounds of things, it seems like a lot of us are experiencing burnout at the same time this year. I feel the collective pain, physically and mentally, of all of you. Maybe we should all meet somewhere and have a drink! Banana, you need to take some time off and pamper yourself. Sometimes great clarity comes while getting away from your every day routine. You may discover what's next for your when you're least expecting it. If it's any consolation, I have no idea what my next phase of life will be either. One thing I do know is that it won't be a job where I work from home..
I did take my annual two weeks in September and came back despising the business. I've been able to work that out and am now just plugging along, with better attitude than I had for a while, but I know it will come back. I also just came back from two days away, and that will help. It's now our slow season, so that makes it easier also. I guess I'm just trying to plan, and am not comfortable with putting my house on the market and not knowing what's next for me? It may very well be that I am meant to be here for awhile yet, until that next thing drops in my lap. I am a strong believer that things happen just as they are supposed to - it gets me through rough spots.

That decision to do it though...it's just killing me. It sounds great - in theory. Actually doing it - scares the bejezzus outta me!
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I am a firm believer in there is a Reason for everything and Everything has a reason. I have seen it too many times to NOT believe in it.
 
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