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birdwatcher

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Why oh Why do people come to B & B's? I know its wrong but we've had the experience that most African Americans have not been to many Bed and Breakfast. Don't want to sound mean, but is this the truth or not? I don't get it, they seem apprehensive, dont usually want breakfast or want something small and always ask about security. Most of the time its ok and they leave happy; but is it that most just don't know or that they just dont feel comfortable in them?
OK-here is the story: so these are govt workers and they two ladies could not find accomodations in the motels or the casino (which is closed due to flooding) and when she called i told her that we have a third floor king size bed room because the second floor with the two beds is taken on the third night she is here and im sure she didnt want to move.
Ok so I'm already thinking PITA-husband shows one in that was on third floor and moves her to the second floor-he will upgrade the guest coming on Tuesday-ok thats fine it just makes me upset because I specifically told her. The other woman was on the first floor and she comes upstairs and the older woman said you should not be climbing stairs -youre pregnant. OK, so maybe there is a medical reason for this. So we talk and I ask what time they want breakfast-they reply (even the pregnant one) Oh we're not much for breakfast-Preg. one said: just sausage and weat toast & fruit, other one said Oh I just have oatmeal and fruit-I say OK-I had to say something to the pregnant one after she said again I'm just not a big breakfast eater-well I said "you should be since youre pregnant" and laughed a little. I still did not get a "time" for breakfast so I asked a little later one said 9:30AM-10-I promptly said that we dont serve breakfast after 9AM she said ok 9. The other one told hubbie that "I should be around by then" WTH!!!!ARGGGGGG!! This morning the couple on the third floor never made it to brekfast-that also irritated me....
I just dont understand-yes you have to use a key an actual key to lock the door when you leave and yes you physically have to lock the front door when you enter and your room has a key....wow
Thanks for letting me vent-I can already tell its gonna be PITA days while they are here-then they ask whether we will have any openings later this week-oh please please find a motel. I know i should not say that-but it just doesnt make any sense to me
 
Breakfast here this morning...4 guests ate a dozen scones, juice & coffee at 7:30 and then left (we start serving at 8 AM), 4 more guests had a plated breakfast at 7:45 (They were there we just figured, 'Feed them and get them on their way!) 1 guest had coffee. 4 more guests left at 6 AM.
Tomorrow I have no idea how many guests are eating. But tomorrow they are all getting the same thing!
 
Sounds more like a case of having someone stay that normally wouldn't stay in a B&B ... they only stayed with you because the motel and casino was not available, so your guests were off their comfort routine. I remember the first time I was forced off my routine and had to stay in a B&B... It was pretty foreign to me and I think I was not comfortable with it at all. I came around a few years later. LOL
Generally, I think we have to be careful with generalizations. ;) AND I learned from my wife not to talk about breakfast when she was pregant. The mere mention of it some days was enough to make her turn green ... even if it wasn't breakfast time.
 
I try to avoid generalizations as this could be anyone who has never stayed in a B & B before. You just have to "educate" them and hopefully with a good experience they will learn and try again.
 
We have lovely African American guests, we are color blind so I am only replying to the thread you started. I feel it is a mistake to stereotype people.
 
Breakfast here this morning...4 guests ate a dozen scones, juice & coffee at 7:30 and then left (we start serving at 8 AM), 4 more guests had a plated breakfast at 7:45 (They were there we just figured, 'Feed them and get them on their way!) 1 guest had coffee. 4 more guests left at 6 AM.
Tomorrow I have no idea how many guests are eating. But tomorrow they are all getting the same thing!.
OK, so we served everyone the same breakfast but they came to the table one at a time. Can't win...
 
im sorry if I offended anyone, it was just that the experiences that I have mentioned is the truth-did not mean anything derogatory by it. I apologize if anyone thought that I did.
 
I think that anyone who is new to a B&B, regardless of ethnicity or anything else, can be apprehensive of the wonderful differences between them and hotels. Sometimes the personal touch just overwhelms them!
regular_smile.gif
 
Cos of our position we have people from all over the world and all languages which can be a challenge. (we had a thai lady in recently and that language barrier was difficult luckily she knew the thai restaurant people so we interpreted through them) But the way I try and see it is I don't know what it is like where they come from. For example that lady was a bit obsessed with security made me lock here bedroom window (on the second floor up a sheer wall about 20 foot up) I would have actually been impressed if someone had gotten up there! and always wore her back pack on the front for security. We to her were "the big city" (we arn't!) but it is people's perception. She was in a strange country and a strange place took the best precautions she knew how. We have people who are obsessed with off street parking (it is very low crime here) but you don't know what it is like where they live if you park on the street you may come back to no tires. I just figure each to their own.
 
Cos of our position we have people from all over the world and all languages which can be a challenge. (we had a thai lady in recently and that language barrier was difficult luckily she knew the thai restaurant people so we interpreted through them) But the way I try and see it is I don't know what it is like where they come from. For example that lady was a bit obsessed with security made me lock here bedroom window (on the second floor up a sheer wall about 20 foot up) I would have actually been impressed if someone had gotten up there! and always wore her back pack on the front for security. We to her were "the big city" (we arn't!) but it is people's perception. She was in a strange country and a strange place took the best precautions she knew how. We have people who are obsessed with off street parking (it is very low crime here) but you don't know what it is like where they live if you park on the street you may come back to no tires. I just figure each to their own..
Sometimes, when we lack certain words for proper communication, we write the sentence in Google Translate. On some languages, not only will it write the words you need to know, but it will all pronounce them. Helpful when someone is Chinese speaking and they are missing a word in their English or French vocabulary.
I don't think that it is any particular ethnicity, it is simply people out of their element. The best thing to do at that point is to ask if they have ever stayed at a B&B and if not, could you give them the lay of the land, so to speak. Educating them will also relax them, ensuring that they feel less like an intruder in your home and more at ease with how they enjoy it.
I know it's a PC thing in the US to use the term African-American, but it can be quite funny to us. We have had a few guests from the US use that term only to realize that we don't really have any African-Americans in Canada.
 
Cos of our position we have people from all over the world and all languages which can be a challenge. (we had a thai lady in recently and that language barrier was difficult luckily she knew the thai restaurant people so we interpreted through them) But the way I try and see it is I don't know what it is like where they come from. For example that lady was a bit obsessed with security made me lock here bedroom window (on the second floor up a sheer wall about 20 foot up) I would have actually been impressed if someone had gotten up there! and always wore her back pack on the front for security. We to her were "the big city" (we arn't!) but it is people's perception. She was in a strange country and a strange place took the best precautions she knew how. We have people who are obsessed with off street parking (it is very low crime here) but you don't know what it is like where they live if you park on the street you may come back to no tires. I just figure each to their own..
Sometimes, when we lack certain words for proper communication, we write the sentence in Google Translate. On some languages, not only will it write the words you need to know, but it will all pronounce them. Helpful when someone is Chinese speaking and they are missing a word in their English or French vocabulary.
I don't think that it is any particular ethnicity, it is simply people out of their element. The best thing to do at that point is to ask if they have ever stayed at a B&B and if not, could you give them the lay of the land, so to speak. Educating them will also relax them, ensuring that they feel less like an intruder in your home and more at ease with how they enjoy it.
I know it's a PC thing in the US to use the term African-American, but it can be quite funny to us. We have had a few guests from the US use that term only to realize that we don't really have any African-Americans in Canada.
.
Its hard to explain but she was using the wrong word ie she asked me how many steps was it to where she was having a meeting. Me - thinking distance but actually what she wanted to know was is it safe to walk there. we got there in the end. so it wasn't lack of word but incorect word.
 
Well we did it yesterday to go-fruit salad, toast, banana muffins, coffee and juice-everything was fine
Its now 8AM and the ladies have not emerged, we thought we would do the same this morning not making anything for them-have a to go sack with a banana, nutrigrain bar, muffins, have toaster out plus coffee or tea-probably wont come down till later and all I will have to say is sorry-but thought that you wanted things to go...Tried our best we did...cant win for loosing huh?
 
They came and got their bag and literaly ran out. They said thank you and all but gone they are. Is wrong to say its a RELIEF to see them go?
Now I can go on with the rest of the week.
 
They came and got their bag and literaly ran out. They said thank you and all but gone they are. Is wrong to say its a RELIEF to see them go?
Now I can go on with the rest of the week..
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
One I am taking from my guests this week is to stop mind reading. I'm no good at it. Guests walked in the door with a list of what they couldn't eat. Instead of trying to get all creative and smarty-farty we just asked, 'What would you like to eat?' And we ended up with the easiest list of foods and we've been able to relax, give them exactly what they want and enjoy their company.
No brain-wracking every morning over what to make.
 
They came and got their bag and literaly ran out. They said thank you and all but gone they are. Is wrong to say its a RELIEF to see them go?
Now I can go on with the rest of the week..
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
One I am taking from my guests this week is to stop mind reading. I'm no good at it. Guests walked in the door with a list of what they couldn't eat. Instead of trying to get all creative and smarty-farty we just asked, 'What would you like to eat?' And we ended up with the easiest list of foods and we've been able to relax, give them exactly what they want and enjoy their company.
No brain-wracking every morning over what to make.
.
Alibi Ike said:
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
I agree completely. Lots of times, you get exactly what you expect. People who are new to a B&B experience are almost always more timid and unsure, which sometimes leads to requests that we might think are unreasonable but are really just because they don't know what to ask for.
Alibi Ike said:
Guests walked in the door with a list of what they couldn't eat. Instead of trying to get all creative and smarty-farty we just asked, 'What would you like to eat?'
Ditto on that! It's so much easier to deal with what they will eat than with what they won't. Especially for the laundry lists. I'd much rather make a single bowl of good oatmeal for someone than try to create an entree for 12 that is gluten-free, sugar-free and fat-free.
 
They came and got their bag and literaly ran out. They said thank you and all but gone they are. Is wrong to say its a RELIEF to see them go?
Now I can go on with the rest of the week..
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
One I am taking from my guests this week is to stop mind reading. I'm no good at it. Guests walked in the door with a list of what they couldn't eat. Instead of trying to get all creative and smarty-farty we just asked, 'What would you like to eat?' And we ended up with the easiest list of foods and we've been able to relax, give them exactly what they want and enjoy their company.
No brain-wracking every morning over what to make.
.
Alibi Ike said:
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
I wish that we innkeepers didn't take things so personally when guests act/react out of the norm. I do it to myself all the time. This past holiday weekend I was just fit to be tied. Why oh why did I tell a guest it was alright to have a very small, intimate wedding ceremony??? When she originally called, I told her we didn't do weddings and was told it would be just the couple, officiant, and photographer. Well, now it turned into "where can we park the 5 cars?" UHHHH??? I was a wreck all day and was totally annoyed with them coming and going when it should have been a relaxing day with no check-outs or check-ins.
From the get go, I had gotten a weird feeling from them...the groom stayed in the car when the bride checked in. When we did see him, it was only from the back, several times and he always had on a sweatshirt with the hoodie cover as much of him as possible. Weird. Then we worried about the grounds...it's been raining and we haven't been able to mow and trim.
All weekend I worried about them. The coming and goings. I couldn't wait for them to leave (3 nights). I thought the worse. Well, on check-out it turns out they had a wonderful time, gave me big hugs (I finally saw his face!), said it was beyond their expectations. You could have knocked me over with a feather!
I did it all to myself. They were happy, and after it was all over I realized how I had overreacted during their stay. Most of the time when guests react differently than what we expect we get that knee-jerk negative reaction, but really, most of the time it's not about us at all.
 
They came and got their bag and literaly ran out. They said thank you and all but gone they are. Is wrong to say its a RELIEF to see them go?
Now I can go on with the rest of the week..
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
One I am taking from my guests this week is to stop mind reading. I'm no good at it. Guests walked in the door with a list of what they couldn't eat. Instead of trying to get all creative and smarty-farty we just asked, 'What would you like to eat?' And we ended up with the easiest list of foods and we've been able to relax, give them exactly what they want and enjoy their company.
No brain-wracking every morning over what to make.
.
Alibi Ike said:
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
I agree completely. Lots of times, you get exactly what you expect. People who are new to a B&B experience are almost always more timid and unsure, which sometimes leads to requests that we might think are unreasonable but are really just because they don't know what to ask for.
Alibi Ike said:
Guests walked in the door with a list of what they couldn't eat. Instead of trying to get all creative and smarty-farty we just asked, 'What would you like to eat?'
Ditto on that! It's so much easier to deal with what they will eat than with what they won't. Especially for the laundry lists. I'd much rather make a single bowl of good oatmeal for someone than try to create an entree for 12 that is gluten-free, sugar-free and fat-free.
.
muirford said:
Lots of times, you get exactly what you expect. People who are new to a B&B experience are almost always more timid and unsure, which sometimes leads to requests that we might think are unreasonable but are really just because they don't know what to ask for.
One of the best experiences we ever had, including the innkeeper flat-out asking at check-in, "Have you ever been to a bed and breakfast before?" Based on the answer, he could correct our expectations as necessary. It opened the dialog about what spaces were off limits, when and where breakfast was served, etc.
I wish we had had that at our first B&B. That experience was so off-putting we avoided B&B's for years.
 
They came and got their bag and literaly ran out. They said thank you and all but gone they are. Is wrong to say its a RELIEF to see them go?
Now I can go on with the rest of the week..
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
One I am taking from my guests this week is to stop mind reading. I'm no good at it. Guests walked in the door with a list of what they couldn't eat. Instead of trying to get all creative and smarty-farty we just asked, 'What would you like to eat?' And we ended up with the easiest list of foods and we've been able to relax, give them exactly what they want and enjoy their company.
No brain-wracking every morning over what to make.
.
Alibi Ike said:
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
I wish that we innkeepers didn't take things so personally when guests act/react out of the norm. I do it to myself all the time. This past holiday weekend I was just fit to be tied. Why oh why did I tell a guest it was alright to have a very small, intimate wedding ceremony??? When she originally called, I told her we didn't do weddings and was told it would be just the couple, officiant, and photographer. Well, now it turned into "where can we park the 5 cars?" UHHHH??? I was a wreck all day and was totally annoyed with them coming and going when it should have been a relaxing day with no check-outs or check-ins.
From the get go, I had gotten a weird feeling from them...the groom stayed in the car when the bride checked in. When we did see him, it was only from the back, several times and he always had on a sweatshirt with the hoodie cover as much of him as possible. Weird. Then we worried about the grounds...it's been raining and we haven't been able to mow and trim.
All weekend I worried about them. The coming and goings. I couldn't wait for them to leave (3 nights). I thought the worse. Well, on check-out it turns out they had a wonderful time, gave me big hugs (I finally saw his face!), said it was beyond their expectations. You could have knocked me over with a feather!
I did it all to myself. They were happy, and after it was all over I realized how I had overreacted during their stay. Most of the time when guests react differently than what we expect we get that knee-jerk negative reaction, but really, most of the time it's not about us at all.
.
Right, we do it to ourselves, which is why I am done with the mind reading.
We had an older couple here this weekend who have never been to a B&B. And she acted like it. Arguing with me from the get-go like I was trying to pull something over on her. I saw her and her husband practically limping up the stairs. Seriously, it took them 2 minutes to come a flight of 12 steps. When they came in and I found out who they were (2 rooms- one upstairs, one downstairs) I asked which room did they want.
Immediate grief. 'We want the room we booked!' (They actually hadn't made the rez, their son did.) 'We could only find this one room on your website and this is the one we want!' (All of the rooms, obviously, are on the website!)
So, I took them UPSTAIRS to the room they 'wanted'. And, on the way, I showed them the room they couldn't find online. Two minutes after I left them they were ringing the bell telling me I gave them the wrong keys...they wanted the 'other' room, but couldn't say that, it was still 'my' fault.
And, yet, got a lovely email from their son saying they (his parents) had a wonderful time and were already talking about coming here on their own later this year.
Learning experience? I will now ask if the guests have ever been to a B&B before, along with asking have they ever been to my town before.
We try to cover as much as we can but if guests don't let on what it is we're not telling them that they need to know, we'll never know and their experience will be diminished. Thru their own fault but we'll be blamed. We do it too. You have a so so experience someplace and then go somewhere remarkably similar and have a great experience because you got what you needed at place B but not at place A.
 
They came and got their bag and literaly ran out. They said thank you and all but gone they are. Is wrong to say its a RELIEF to see them go?
Now I can go on with the rest of the week..
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
One I am taking from my guests this week is to stop mind reading. I'm no good at it. Guests walked in the door with a list of what they couldn't eat. Instead of trying to get all creative and smarty-farty we just asked, 'What would you like to eat?' And we ended up with the easiest list of foods and we've been able to relax, give them exactly what they want and enjoy their company.
No brain-wracking every morning over what to make.
.
Alibi Ike said:
Anytime I feel relief to see a guest leave I wonder what I can learn from the experience? What was I missing? What cues and clues could I have tried to find? How could I have interacted better to avoid the 'glad to see them go' feeling? Sometimes, we are just better off seeing someone out the door, other times there's a lesson.
I wish that we innkeepers didn't take things so personally when guests act/react out of the norm. I do it to myself all the time. This past holiday weekend I was just fit to be tied. Why oh why did I tell a guest it was alright to have a very small, intimate wedding ceremony??? When she originally called, I told her we didn't do weddings and was told it would be just the couple, officiant, and photographer. Well, now it turned into "where can we park the 5 cars?" UHHHH??? I was a wreck all day and was totally annoyed with them coming and going when it should have been a relaxing day with no check-outs or check-ins.
From the get go, I had gotten a weird feeling from them...the groom stayed in the car when the bride checked in. When we did see him, it was only from the back, several times and he always had on a sweatshirt with the hoodie cover as much of him as possible. Weird. Then we worried about the grounds...it's been raining and we haven't been able to mow and trim.
All weekend I worried about them. The coming and goings. I couldn't wait for them to leave (3 nights). I thought the worse. Well, on check-out it turns out they had a wonderful time, gave me big hugs (I finally saw his face!), said it was beyond their expectations. You could have knocked me over with a feather!
I did it all to myself. They were happy, and after it was all over I realized how I had overreacted during their stay. Most of the time when guests react differently than what we expect we get that knee-jerk negative reaction, but really, most of the time it's not about us at all.
.
Right, we do it to ourselves, which is why I am done with the mind reading.
We had an older couple here this weekend who have never been to a B&B. And she acted like it. Arguing with me from the get-go like I was trying to pull something over on her. I saw her and her husband practically limping up the stairs. Seriously, it took them 2 minutes to come a flight of 12 steps. When they came in and I found out who they were (2 rooms- one upstairs, one downstairs) I asked which room did they want.
Immediate grief. 'We want the room we booked!' (They actually hadn't made the rez, their son did.) 'We could only find this one room on your website and this is the one we want!' (All of the rooms, obviously, are on the website!)
So, I took them UPSTAIRS to the room they 'wanted'. And, on the way, I showed them the room they couldn't find online. Two minutes after I left them they were ringing the bell telling me I gave them the wrong keys...they wanted the 'other' room, but couldn't say that, it was still 'my' fault.
And, yet, got a lovely email from their son saying they (his parents) had a wonderful time and were already talking about coming here on their own later this year.
Learning experience? I will now ask if the guests have ever been to a B&B before, along with asking have they ever been to my town before.
We try to cover as much as we can but if guests don't let on what it is we're not telling them that they need to know, we'll never know and their experience will be diminished. Thru their own fault but we'll be blamed. We do it too. You have a so so experience someplace and then go somewhere remarkably similar and have a great experience because you got what you needed at place B but not at place A.
.
We try to cover as much as we can but if guests don't let on what it is we're not telling them that they need to know, we'll never know and their experience will be diminished. Thru their own fault but we'll be blamed. We do it too. You have a so so experience someplace and then go somewhere remarkably similar and have a great experience because you got what you needed at place B but not at place A.
SO TRUE!!!!
A large percentage of our new guests have never been to a b&b but are willing to try us because of breakfast delivery. The two questions I always ask on check-in is "have you ever been to a b&b before?" and "Have you ever been to this section of the coast before?" The answer to those two questions can really make or break their experience with us.
 
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