the need to please

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four at four forty four

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for as long as i can remember i've had a need to please. which, as you might expect, can be good and bad. i think it makes me a good innkeeper, but i think it causes me a great deal of personal stress. at times, almost overwhelming.
my bed and breakfast is located in an older home. there is one thermostat and radiators in each room. all the radiators can be adjusted. as much as i fuss over the heat someone is always too cold and someone is always too hot, it seems. some people think the coffees too strong, others rave about it. some people think breakfast is amazing, other don't say a word. and the list continues...
overall i'm confident in what i do and think i offer great accomodations, but it's this 'need to please' that's been consuming me these days. does anyone else struggle with the same issue? can you offer advice? sometimes i want to say 'screw it 'and just do what i do confindently and hope for the best, but i still can't shake the need to make everyone happy.
help.
 
Go back to the old saying
"You can only please some of the people some of the time ..." and remember that a "need to please" is a good thing, a VERY good thing in our industry except when it begins to consume you - so you either have to stop trying so hard, stop worrying so much or find a balance between the 2
The day you need to start worrying is when you STOP "trying to please"
 
four at four forty four said:
overall i'm confident in what i do and think i offer great accomodations, but it's this 'need to please' that's been consuming me these days. does anyone else struggle with the same issue? can you offer advice? sometimes i want to say 'screw it 'and just do what i do confindently and hope for the best, but i still can't shake the need to make everyone happy.
help.
After 7 years I know the only person I can make happy 100% of the time is me. And I fail even there. So- do the absolute best you can and 'let it go grasshopper'. There is no way you can make every single person happy, but what you can do is make them feel cared about. Which I bet you do in spades.
If the guest can adjust the radiators for more or less heat, show them how.
As for coffee, you are dealing with personal preferences and not a single coffee company can please everyone. If they could, there would not be 37 different coffee empires out there! Same thing with pillows or firm/soft beds. Or breakfast.
I have had guests absolutely rave about the breakfasts they were served elsewhere. Over the top, gourmet food that I don't even attempt. And, next day I have had guests tell me they are so happy I don't serve that 'frou frou food'. It is what it is. If you create, cook & serve the food with heart & soul, that will come through for the guest even if they didn't particularly care for what you served.
Keep in mind as well that there are people out there who wouldn't compliment you no matter what you did. It's just the way they are.
 
It is humanly impossible to please everyone, as many people are simply unpleasable. I know this must exhaust you. You have a lovely place and a wonderful spirit and definitely have the hospitality gene!
If it were me, what I would do, is really enjoy to the fullest those you can please, make them your target audience. Those are the ones who really appreciate all you do! I dare to guess those are the ones who are the least bother, who already find what you do for them to be above and beyond.
Just as an fyi I can be too hot and too cold within my own body! So that is just not something we can always conquer, making everything 100% perfect. And I will add, since you have a "passion to please" I bet you are your own worst critic, and the things you may feel are not good enough are more than enough!
cheers.gif
 
It is humanly impossible to please everyone, as many people are simply unpleasable. I know this must exhaust you. You have a lovely place and a wonderful spirit and definitely have the hospitality gene!
If it were me, what I would do, is really enjoy to the fullest those you can please, make them your target audience. Those are the ones who really appreciate all you do! I dare to guess those are the ones who are the least bother, who already find what you do for them to be above and beyond.
Just as an fyi I can be too hot and too cold within my own body! So that is just not something we can always conquer, making everything 100% perfect. And I will add, since you have a "passion to please" I bet you are your own worst critic, and the things you may feel are not good enough are more than enough!
cheers.gif
.
Joey Bloggs said:
Just as an fyi I can be
too hot and too coldwithin my own body!
Amen and Aaaa-men!
 
Amen tp what has been said and I'd like to add:
You are probably pleasing more people than you realize. Don't forget, there are those who are UNHAPPY unless there is something to complain about. So when you hear them complain about the temp or the coffee, you are actually pleasing them immensely by letting them tell you how you should be doing it all.
Rii
 
Amen tp what has been said and I'd like to add:
You are probably pleasing more people than you realize. Don't forget, there are those who are UNHAPPY unless there is something to complain about. So when you hear them complain about the temp or the coffee, you are actually pleasing them immensely by letting them tell you how you should be doing it all.
Rii.
Right on! They are the equivilant of those who "enjoy bad health"!
 
Amen tp what has been said and I'd like to add:
You are probably pleasing more people than you realize. Don't forget, there are those who are UNHAPPY unless there is something to complain about. So when you hear them complain about the temp or the coffee, you are actually pleasing them immensely by letting them tell you how you should be doing it all.
Rii.
haha....that is too true! Giving them a chance to complain is a gift to them! :)
 
Just saw this article and found it interesting, not sure if I agree or disagree, but interesting nonetheless:
Excerpt:
Sure, you can go on being all things to all people. But by keeping that wide open definition, you are cutting down your opportunity to succeed.
The Narrower The Niche, the Wider the Opportunity[/h3]
 
You do need to find a balance. There's no such thing as pleasing 100% of people. So, you need to just do your best and if somebody doesn't like your best, then DO say screw it.
Life's too short.
 
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