Quantcast

What to do about this? moral dilema

INNspiring.com | Innkeeper Forum & Innkeeping Resources

Help Support INNspiring.com | Innkeeper Forum & Innkeeping Resources:

Joey Camb

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 2, 2010
Messages
4,793
Reaction score
0
My next door neighbour who i also my mum's best friend runs a Large scale B&B (14 bedrooms and she is building another 4) but to be blunt it isn't very nice she doesn't pay it proper attention and it has got run down and she takes a lot of Stag and Hen Parties that sort of thing. Quite often her guests check in and then walk out and quite often they come straight to me and I take them in if I can. But it puts me in a difficult moral position. I honestly don't think she would care to much as she simply charges the card and see's it as not her problem but I feel bad about it. Her staff have a naughty habit of lying to the guests when they ask if they will be charged if they leave they say no as they don't want to be shouted at but I know full well they will be. I had this with a couple this week who had walked out and come to me I didn't know they were hers and sorted them out with another neighbour and it came out later. They had been told they wouldn't be charged but I knew they would be. A lady came to me and I did warn her but she said I don't care it all goes to the company so I thought fair enough but I did ask her not to let Yoko know that she had come here. From the point of view of warning people they will be charged how much is this my responsibility?
 

EmptyNest

Well-known member
Joined
May 22, 2008
Messages
8,741
Reaction score
1
Sorry, I don't think it is your responsibility at all. It is her business and not yours. You don't have to tell the guests that come to you anything. What if you didn't know what was going on there? You wouldn't warn them so why should you now. I would not say anything about how they run their business to anyone. If the guest asks you, you can tell them to check back at the other place. They will find out soon enough when the charge comes on their statement and then they can fight it or not.
Again...not your call. I'd stay out of it. Run your business properly and don't worry about what the others are doing. I know its hard because you are a good person..but this could put you in a bad position.
 

Morticia

Administrator
Staff member
Administrator
Moderator
Joined
May 22, 2008
Messages
17,358
Reaction score
226
Not your problem as the guest will deal with it thru their cc company when they see their bill and why would YOU know anything about it anyway?
I totally get that you do not want to see these lovely guests get screwed, but it's between the guest and the other biz at this point.
If the guest hints around to you about possible charges you can ask them if they spoke with the owner or one of the staff and suggest they really need to verify everything with the owner.
 

Innkeeper To Go

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2009
Messages
1,395
Reaction score
0
I understand your predicament, both from the point of view of this being your mother's dear friend as well as from your need to do right by your guests.
That's quite the tightrope you'd be walking if you took this on.
If you warn the guests, you stand a good chance of those same guests marching right back to the other B&B and telling them what they heard. That's definitely a no-win.
On the other hand, do you willingly accept a guest who thinks they can afford to stay with you because they've been okayed to leave early without penalty - when you, in fact, believe they're being deceived?
I think the best you can do would be to gently encourage the guests to think of getting confirmation in writing that they'd been cleared of any penalties/charges before going ahead with a move. But even at that, you'd need to be quite cautious about what was said and how it was said, not saying anything negative about any particular inn.
All in all, if it's a question as to how much this is your responsibility, it's not only not your responsibility, it's a very risky undertaking to discuss what happens at another inn with any guest. The best plan is to stay out of it. It is entirely outside of your control as well as your responsibility.
 

gillumhouse

Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
Supporting Member
Joined
May 22, 2008
Messages
15,559
Reaction score
145
You become Sgt Schultz - I know not-tink, Col. Hogan!!!
 

YellowSocks

Well-known member
Supporting Member
Joined
May 22, 2008
Messages
2,179
Reaction score
13
NONE of it is your responsibility.
But I agree, it's hard to care about your guests and know they're about to get screwed.
I agree with Morticia that IF a guest mentions or discusses charges from the other B&B, you can find ways of saying that it's up to the owner there, not the staff, whether or not they'll be charged.
Bummer though...
=/
Kk.
 

Joey Camb

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 2, 2010
Messages
4,793
Reaction score
0
The line I am taking at the moment is that for example that couple they went to my neighbour (the nice place) and she was the one who discovered they were from the Azealia and warned them so they went back and in the end stayed at another one of her hotels so tabs lost out on about $200 as it would have been a 2 night stay and she had run round like an idiot to help them and so had I. To be frank I wouldn't go that far if they said oh they said I woudn't be charged I would run with it. If the guest starts talking with me I am just going to say Its my neighbour and I don't want to get into it or words to that effect. I feel sorry for her but part of the problem is that she doesn't see that there is a problem with her place it is all the guests problem. But if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident.
 

wendydk

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 7, 2009
Messages
1,656
Reaction score
0
The line I am taking at the moment is that for example that couple they went to my neighbour (the nice place) and she was the one who discovered they were from the Azealia and warned them so they went back and in the end stayed at another one of her hotels so tabs lost out on about $200 as it would have been a 2 night stay and she had run round like an idiot to help them and so had I. To be frank I wouldn't go that far if they said oh they said I woudn't be charged I would run with it. If the guest starts talking with me I am just going to say Its my neighbour and I don't want to get into it or words to that effect. I feel sorry for her but part of the problem is that she doesn't see that there is a problem with her place it is all the guests problem. But if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident..
camberleyhotelharrogate@yahoo.co.uk said:
if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident.
With reviews becoming more and more popular, it will all come 'round and bite her in the nether regions.
 

Joey Camb

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 2, 2010
Messages
4,793
Reaction score
0
The line I am taking at the moment is that for example that couple they went to my neighbour (the nice place) and she was the one who discovered they were from the Azealia and warned them so they went back and in the end stayed at another one of her hotels so tabs lost out on about $200 as it would have been a 2 night stay and she had run round like an idiot to help them and so had I. To be frank I wouldn't go that far if they said oh they said I woudn't be charged I would run with it. If the guest starts talking with me I am just going to say Its my neighbour and I don't want to get into it or words to that effect. I feel sorry for her but part of the problem is that she doesn't see that there is a problem with her place it is all the guests problem. But if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident..
camberleyhotelharrogate@yahoo.co.uk said:
if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident.
With reviews becoming more and more popular, it will all come 'round and bite her in the nether regions.
.
You say that but she has had horrondus reviews on Laterooms, booking.com and trip adviser for about 3 years now and it doesn't seem to make much difference.
 

IronGate

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 9, 2008
Messages
476
Reaction score
0
The line I am taking at the moment is that for example that couple they went to my neighbour (the nice place) and she was the one who discovered they were from the Azealia and warned them so they went back and in the end stayed at another one of her hotels so tabs lost out on about $200 as it would have been a 2 night stay and she had run round like an idiot to help them and so had I. To be frank I wouldn't go that far if they said oh they said I woudn't be charged I would run with it. If the guest starts talking with me I am just going to say Its my neighbour and I don't want to get into it or words to that effect. I feel sorry for her but part of the problem is that she doesn't see that there is a problem with her place it is all the guests problem. But if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident..
camberleyhotelharrogate@yahoo.co.uk said:
if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident.
With reviews becoming more and more popular, it will all come 'round and bite her in the nether regions.
.
You say that but she has had horrondus reviews on Laterooms, booking.com and trip adviser for about 3 years now and it doesn't seem to make much difference.
.
camberleyhotelharrogate@yahoo.co.uk said:
You say that but she has had horrondus reviews on Laterooms, booking.com and trip adviser for about 3 years now and it doesn't seem to make much difference.
Just wait. I think right now we are in a world where about 20-30% of the travelling public post and use the review sites, and the rest don't know they are there, or understand the significance or terminology of the reviews. If the reviews are found, the travellers tend to see an overall rating; three stars, or three dots out of 5, or more than 50% on any scale and they think, "Ah, above average! Book it!"
In the next few years, that proration will change, and the pace of the change will be ever increasing until virtually all the travelling public are proactively using the reviews, and know what they mean.
 

Joey Camb

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 2, 2010
Messages
4,793
Reaction score
0
The line I am taking at the moment is that for example that couple they went to my neighbour (the nice place) and she was the one who discovered they were from the Azealia and warned them so they went back and in the end stayed at another one of her hotels so tabs lost out on about $200 as it would have been a 2 night stay and she had run round like an idiot to help them and so had I. To be frank I wouldn't go that far if they said oh they said I woudn't be charged I would run with it. If the guest starts talking with me I am just going to say Its my neighbour and I don't want to get into it or words to that effect. I feel sorry for her but part of the problem is that she doesn't see that there is a problem with her place it is all the guests problem. But if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident..
camberleyhotelharrogate@yahoo.co.uk said:
if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident.
With reviews becoming more and more popular, it will all come 'round and bite her in the nether regions.
.
You say that but she has had horrondus reviews on Laterooms, booking.com and trip adviser for about 3 years now and it doesn't seem to make much difference.
.
camberleyhotelharrogate@yahoo.co.uk said:
You say that but she has had horrondus reviews on Laterooms, booking.com and trip adviser for about 3 years now and it doesn't seem to make much difference.
Just wait. I think right now we are in a world where about 20-30% of the travelling public post and use the review sites, and the rest don't know they are there, or understand the significance or terminology of the reviews. If the reviews are found, the travellers tend to see an overall rating; three stars, or three dots out of 5, or more than 50% on any scale and they think, "Ah, above average! Book it!"
In the next few years, that proration will change, and the pace of the change will be ever increasing until virtually all the travelling public are proactively using the reviews, and know what they mean.
.
I think for holiday people it does make a difference but like the lady I picked up yesterday her company booked it for her and all they looked at was the price. I think it depends who is doing the booking and I know for certain if I was booking for myself I would check everything. My parents who are in their 70's can't use the internet much but they know enough to ask me to check out anywhere they are going to in advance of booking. Also depending on companies for example Laterooms emails each customer who books through them and askes them to review so it really pushes people to do it and they use your review points in the algorithm which puts you in order of advertising on their site. (ours is dark green which is the best of which I am quite proud)
 

IronGate

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 9, 2008
Messages
476
Reaction score
0
The line I am taking at the moment is that for example that couple they went to my neighbour (the nice place) and she was the one who discovered they were from the Azealia and warned them so they went back and in the end stayed at another one of her hotels so tabs lost out on about $200 as it would have been a 2 night stay and she had run round like an idiot to help them and so had I. To be frank I wouldn't go that far if they said oh they said I woudn't be charged I would run with it. If the guest starts talking with me I am just going to say Its my neighbour and I don't want to get into it or words to that effect. I feel sorry for her but part of the problem is that she doesn't see that there is a problem with her place it is all the guests problem. But if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident..
camberleyhotelharrogate@yahoo.co.uk said:
if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident.
With reviews becoming more and more popular, it will all come 'round and bite her in the nether regions.
.
You say that but she has had horrondus reviews on Laterooms, booking.com and trip adviser for about 3 years now and it doesn't seem to make much difference.
.
OK, I read her reviews. Is there really a tomb in the garden?
 

Samster

Well-known member
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
6,475
Reaction score
14
Location
South Carolina
I know exactly where you're coming from. I had similar issues here. I had quite a few people that would also call me on the phone & ask, "Why isn't ABC B&B answering their phone?!" How should I know? That isn't MY business, it's totally run by someone else. But, it is very tricky because you just don't know what will get back to the other business and if the whole thing will get turned around or not. I just said that we were separate businesses and I had no knowledge of how they booked their guests, treated their guests, or anything because all the B&Bs here just do their own thing. There were some guests that just couldn't understand WHY we wouldn't know everything about the other places. I also told them that I never stayed with them so had no clue about it from the guest perspective. But, I did know what WE had to offer. :)
We had plenty of guests that came to stay with us after staying with them and they wanted to really "tell all". I just tried to nip that too and tell them that whatever had happened, we were glad that they found us.
 

Morticia

Administrator
Staff member
Administrator
Moderator
Joined
May 22, 2008
Messages
17,358
Reaction score
226
I know exactly where you're coming from. I had similar issues here. I had quite a few people that would also call me on the phone & ask, "Why isn't ABC B&B answering their phone?!" How should I know? That isn't MY business, it's totally run by someone else. But, it is very tricky because you just don't know what will get back to the other business and if the whole thing will get turned around or not. I just said that we were separate businesses and I had no knowledge of how they booked their guests, treated their guests, or anything because all the B&Bs here just do their own thing. There were some guests that just couldn't understand WHY we wouldn't know everything about the other places. I also told them that I never stayed with them so had no clue about it from the guest perspective. But, I did know what WE had to offer. :)
We had plenty of guests that came to stay with us after staying with them and they wanted to really "tell all". I just tried to nip that too and tell them that whatever had happened, we were glad that they found us..
It is a fine line...we had an 'incident' here where a guest called a B&B that was full and was told 'the whole town is full, no rooms anywhere,' which was not true. The owner of the B&B that did have rooms also got called and the guest told them what the other B&B said. Owner B called Owner A and threatened to sue over 'loss of income' and 'defamation' if Owner A ever told a guest the town was full for any reason. (Owner B is closed because there was just reason no one would refer there.)
But word does get around.
We had a guest here who 'spilled their guts' over another B&B they just didn't like as if I don't know those people or ever talk with them! So, it kind of goes both ways...sure we know what's going on, but we're not going to tell the guest, even when the guest is questioning why don't we know! And we've had owners ask us if we got 'so and so' the other night and I won't lie. I will say we did get that guest if they showed up here.
If asked, we just say, 'Oh it's a lovely place,' if it is and, 'Oh, we've never stayed there,' if it isn't. If the guests push we tell them to read the reviews and make their own determination. But that we really like our place best. Wink wink. (Tough to get that wink thing to come out over the phone, tho.)
 

Samster

Well-known member
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
6,475
Reaction score
14
Location
South Carolina
I know exactly where you're coming from. I had similar issues here. I had quite a few people that would also call me on the phone & ask, "Why isn't ABC B&B answering their phone?!" How should I know? That isn't MY business, it's totally run by someone else. But, it is very tricky because you just don't know what will get back to the other business and if the whole thing will get turned around or not. I just said that we were separate businesses and I had no knowledge of how they booked their guests, treated their guests, or anything because all the B&Bs here just do their own thing. There were some guests that just couldn't understand WHY we wouldn't know everything about the other places. I also told them that I never stayed with them so had no clue about it from the guest perspective. But, I did know what WE had to offer. :)
We had plenty of guests that came to stay with us after staying with them and they wanted to really "tell all". I just tried to nip that too and tell them that whatever had happened, we were glad that they found us..
It is a fine line...we had an 'incident' here where a guest called a B&B that was full and was told 'the whole town is full, no rooms anywhere,' which was not true. The owner of the B&B that did have rooms also got called and the guest told them what the other B&B said. Owner B called Owner A and threatened to sue over 'loss of income' and 'defamation' if Owner A ever told a guest the town was full for any reason. (Owner B is closed because there was just reason no one would refer there.)
But word does get around.
We had a guest here who 'spilled their guts' over another B&B they just didn't like as if I don't know those people or ever talk with them! So, it kind of goes both ways...sure we know what's going on, but we're not going to tell the guest, even when the guest is questioning why don't we know! And we've had owners ask us if we got 'so and so' the other night and I won't lie. I will say we did get that guest if they showed up here.
If asked, we just say, 'Oh it's a lovely place,' if it is and, 'Oh, we've never stayed there,' if it isn't. If the guests push we tell them to read the reviews and make their own determination. But that we really like our place best. Wink wink. (Tough to get that wink thing to come out over the phone, tho.)
.
Exactly...a fine line. I also think that one of the other places here had someone call me on a "fishing expedition" to see what I would say. I would generally say that we all had something a bit different to offer and after telling them what made us special, I hoped that the guest would book with us. I was always very careful not to say anything negative about the other B&Bs. Just the facts, ma'am. If we were full, I'd tell them the number of rooms, services, etc. for the other places and give them the phone numbers. Then they could check out the reviews for themselves.
I've been in the other B&Bs here but could honestly say that I didn't know how they would treat me as a guest because I hadn't stayed there. Even after hearing things that were less than glowing, I would just give people the basic facts. I think people can figure things out on their own....
 

Joey Camb

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 2, 2010
Messages
4,793
Reaction score
0
The line I am taking at the moment is that for example that couple they went to my neighbour (the nice place) and she was the one who discovered they were from the Azealia and warned them so they went back and in the end stayed at another one of her hotels so tabs lost out on about $200 as it would have been a 2 night stay and she had run round like an idiot to help them and so had I. To be frank I wouldn't go that far if they said oh they said I woudn't be charged I would run with it. If the guest starts talking with me I am just going to say Its my neighbour and I don't want to get into it or words to that effect. I feel sorry for her but part of the problem is that she doesn't see that there is a problem with her place it is all the guests problem. But if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident..
camberleyhotelharrogate@yahoo.co.uk said:
if you read her trip adviser believe me it is not an isolated incident.
With reviews becoming more and more popular, it will all come 'round and bite her in the nether regions.
.
You say that but she has had horrondus reviews on Laterooms, booking.com and trip adviser for about 3 years now and it doesn't seem to make much difference.
.
OK, I read her reviews. Is there really a tomb in the garden?
.
No but there are two really weird fountains which are made out of bits of wood covered in plumbers foam and painted blue which could in the dark be mistaken for some kind of tomb thing.
 

Joey Camb

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 2, 2010
Messages
4,793
Reaction score
0
I know people always think B&B's in a small town are some how connected. It was really busy in town one time and I managed to find this couple a room at the Cavendish (really nice place run by two really nice ladies) and they said do you know them? well at that time I knew them a little but I wouldn't say well and they wanted me to "use my influence" to get a better price! I said they run their own businesss and it was up to them. I wouldn't presume to interfer they were complete idiots anyway! They were friends of friends of our head chef and had come one a Friends and Family stay which is $70 mid week and said could they come back at the weekend and were told no we were full and we don't do them on weekednds anyway so they just turned up! and said they were friends of the head chef. I worked hard to find them a room as I am a good friend of The head chef's and was worried about his friends but it turned out they were only friends of friends and He went mad about them turning up and embarassing him and how could his friends have let them come (in full head chef style) and at them to and told them to drive home! The joys of working in a big hotel I miss it sometimes! And if people are a friend of mine I haggle up for my friend not down for the customer!
 

Samster

Well-known member
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
6,475
Reaction score
14
Location
South Carolina
I know people always think B&B's in a small town are some how connected. It was really busy in town one time and I managed to find this couple a room at the Cavendish (really nice place run by two really nice ladies) and they said do you know them? well at that time I knew them a little but I wouldn't say well and they wanted me to "use my influence" to get a better price! I said they run their own businesss and it was up to them. I wouldn't presume to interfer they were complete idiots anyway! They were friends of friends of our head chef and had come one a Friends and Family stay which is $70 mid week and said could they come back at the weekend and were told no we were full and we don't do them on weekednds anyway so they just turned up! and said they were friends of the head chef. I worked hard to find them a room as I am a good friend of The head chef's and was worried about his friends but it turned out they were only friends of friends and He went mad about them turning up and embarassing him and how could his friends have let them come (in full head chef style) and at them to and told them to drive home! The joys of working in a big hotel I miss it sometimes! And if people are a friend of mine I haggle up for my friend not down for the customer!.
I just read that whole thing with a Yorkshire accent in my head! Brilliant..... :)
 

wendydk

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 7, 2009
Messages
1,656
Reaction score
0
I know people always think B&B's in a small town are some how connected. It was really busy in town one time and I managed to find this couple a room at the Cavendish (really nice place run by two really nice ladies) and they said do you know them? well at that time I knew them a little but I wouldn't say well and they wanted me to "use my influence" to get a better price! I said they run their own businesss and it was up to them. I wouldn't presume to interfer they were complete idiots anyway! They were friends of friends of our head chef and had come one a Friends and Family stay which is $70 mid week and said could they come back at the weekend and were told no we were full and we don't do them on weekednds anyway so they just turned up! and said they were friends of the head chef. I worked hard to find them a room as I am a good friend of The head chef's and was worried about his friends but it turned out they were only friends of friends and He went mad about them turning up and embarassing him and how could his friends have let them come (in full head chef style) and at them to and told them to drive home! The joys of working in a big hotel I miss it sometimes! And if people are a friend of mine I haggle up for my friend not down for the customer!.
I just read that whole thing with a Yorkshire accent in my head! Brilliant..... :)
.
Samster said:
I just read that whole thing with a Yorkshire accent in my head!
That cracks me up, because every one of her posts reads that way for me too
 

Samster

Well-known member
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
6,475
Reaction score
14
Location
South Carolina
I know people always think B&B's in a small town are some how connected. It was really busy in town one time and I managed to find this couple a room at the Cavendish (really nice place run by two really nice ladies) and they said do you know them? well at that time I knew them a little but I wouldn't say well and they wanted me to "use my influence" to get a better price! I said they run their own businesss and it was up to them. I wouldn't presume to interfer they were complete idiots anyway! They were friends of friends of our head chef and had come one a Friends and Family stay which is $70 mid week and said could they come back at the weekend and were told no we were full and we don't do them on weekednds anyway so they just turned up! and said they were friends of the head chef. I worked hard to find them a room as I am a good friend of The head chef's and was worried about his friends but it turned out they were only friends of friends and He went mad about them turning up and embarassing him and how could his friends have let them come (in full head chef style) and at them to and told them to drive home! The joys of working in a big hotel I miss it sometimes! And if people are a friend of mine I haggle up for my friend not down for the customer!.
I just read that whole thing with a Yorkshire accent in my head! Brilliant..... :)
.
Samster said:
I just read that whole thing with a Yorkshire accent in my head!
That cracks me up, because every one of her posts reads that way for me too
.
I LOVE IT! When we were over there last Fall, I had a gentleman lecture me on the merits of being a Yorkshireman. It was wonderful. :)
 
Top