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Country Girl

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It seems our social life has taken a real hit these past few years. As business increases, our time with friends decreases. When we are free to go out to dinner during the week, they are not. We do go out occasionally on weekends but I'm never completely relaxed thinking that the guests might need something and I'm not there. Entertaining here is not an option because I don't want to cook and clean for friends. We live fairly far from civilization which means there's at least an hour of commuting time too which means getting home really late at night. That's difficult when I have to be up early for breakfast. So, how do you find time for friends?
 
It took me 7 years of operation to discover that I was holding myself back. This summer I have spent more time with my family than in the last seven years combined. When I have all stayovers, or I know all arrivals will be in by a certain time, I will leave. I just put dessert in the fridge, put out lots of hot water, and a note telling guests that I am spending time with my family, and leave our cell phone numbers in case of emergency. I've even done self-checkins on two occasions this year.
Most of the time, no one has even been back by the time we return. So simple....and I've missed out on so much...
 
We see friends when things slow down, even if it's not off season, but we rarely go out, even just together in season. Family will come to visit on slow days in season. All of our friends are innkeepers so they understand. It appears all of our family are workaholics so they get it, too. (Except the grandkids. They don't get it at all.)
 
DH does not travel well any longer so the kids come here. When they tell us they are coming, we just block rooms. Do I need the revenue - very much so, but my kids are more impotant - it is only money. My cousins came to visit last month, my only cousin on Daddy's side and she was interested to see what I do - we had guests one day that she was here. They were check-in, I knew what time was breakfast, so we took her to see a play Oklahoma being done at an amphitheater by the Town & Gown Players. The next week I had enough notice to block rooms (and said we were full to all cllers during that time) so I could play tour guide.
We do have friends 60 miles from us that we see rarely because they drive school bus during the week and we have guests weekends. The great thing is that we all understand so when we DO connect, it is great. We will probably go to their family reunion the Sunday of Labor Day weekend - we are honorary Joneses.
 
I am lucky I have one sister who lives in the same town and my parents live 5 mins away in the car and pop in most days (ie dad to do small DIY jobs and mum to use our free town centre car parking while she shops in town) Having worked in hotels most of my life most of my friends are hotel people and know not to ring or pop by before 11am etc and always ring ahead or if they catch me when I am busy they often pitch in and help. I keep in touch with people via snail mail as I like letter writing but it is a case of being strikt about your life. I was a bit nervous in case people had a problem when I was out to dinner but so far so good.
 
LB you are inspirational. We can say one thing and do another, we can fret and stress and in the end it is only ourselves who pay, the guests never know nor would they want us to babysit them. I am so happy to read your words, as always, and a good reminder.
As always I start out with good intentions and then let the business overwhelm me like a dark cloud. No one wins when we obsess or control all the time (speaking of myself only).
Let me ask the innkeepers this - besides the question of friends and family, DO YOU HAVE A HOBBY?
The answer to that question, should not be, hopefully, only when the snow comes...and we are locked inside with no guests. Make time for yourself. As DH said the other day, "If we plan on being here a while I might as well make US comfortable" Does it take 7 years for us to get that? Perhaps.
[FONT= 'Lucida Grande']"Life is so unlike theory"[/FONT]
 
LB you are inspirational. We can say one thing and do another, we can fret and stress and in the end it is only ourselves who pay, the guests never know nor would they want us to babysit them. I am so happy to read your words, as always, and a good reminder.
As always I start out with good intentions and then let the business overwhelm me like a dark cloud. No one wins when we obsess or control all the time (speaking of myself only).
Let me ask the innkeepers this - besides the question of friends and family, DO YOU HAVE A HOBBY?
The answer to that question, should not be, hopefully, only when the snow comes...and we are locked inside with no guests. Make time for yourself. As DH said the other day, "If we plan on being here a while I might as well make US comfortable" Does it take 7 years for us to get that? Perhaps.
[FONT= 'Lucida Grande']"Life is so unlike theory"[/FONT].
I'm still writing my book, if that counts. I quilt. Mostly I read, but that's always been my favorite pastime. I do my puzzle page every day now instead of just Sundays.
 
LB you are inspirational. We can say one thing and do another, we can fret and stress and in the end it is only ourselves who pay, the guests never know nor would they want us to babysit them. I am so happy to read your words, as always, and a good reminder.
As always I start out with good intentions and then let the business overwhelm me like a dark cloud. No one wins when we obsess or control all the time (speaking of myself only).
Let me ask the innkeepers this - besides the question of friends and family, DO YOU HAVE A HOBBY?
The answer to that question, should not be, hopefully, only when the snow comes...and we are locked inside with no guests. Make time for yourself. As DH said the other day, "If we plan on being here a while I might as well make US comfortable" Does it take 7 years for us to get that? Perhaps.
[FONT= 'Lucida Grande']"Life is so unlike theory"[/FONT].
Last Fall the Librarian asked me if I would give knitting lessons - not that I was a great knitter, she just knew I knew how and asked. So I did. The weather killed it so I have been asked if I will do it again. We are starting the end of Sept when I am done with Conferences etc. amd there will be enough time to make something for Christmas.
I ended up getting so involved in it that I havenow made something for 7 of the 8 grandkis (one to go) and am now about half finished with a "funky" hat the cop jokingly (but does want) asked for because she is coming this month.
My other hobby is volunteering for the City and the State. I give myself some reading time at bedtime.
 
When I need a family fix, I hop in the car and go.. if the bookings have slowed down. DH will stay here and mind the fort. He takes off, too. Taking off at the same time takes some planning... we have blocked off rooms for special family occasions. But we always forward the phone to our cell and make reservations while we're away. We get a house sitter to take care of plants and pets.
With only 5 rooms, the 2 of us can take off for dinner once everyone has checked in. We've both been able to do things in the community... community theatre - altho it's impossible for both of us to be involved with a play at the same time. Most of the things we do, we can be reached by telephone and excuse ourselves. DH reads a lot - I surf the 'net a lot :)
 
All of our family and most of our really close friends do not live here or anywhere near here. We found that spending any time with them took a major hit when we opened the business. We missed several very important occasions. One of the major reasons why we closed the biz when we got very busy and it just seemed like we'd have to block off more time. We decided to re-focus our priorities on our own relationship, family, and friends. It was a great decision. We're seeing more of folks this year than we had in quite awhile. I just spent 5 days with our son in TX and we had a fantastic visit!
 
All of our family and most of our really close friends do not live here or anywhere near here. We found that spending any time with them took a major hit when we opened the business. We missed several very important occasions. One of the major reasons why we closed the biz when we got very busy and it just seemed like we'd have to block off more time. We decided to re-focus our priorities on our own relationship, family, and friends. It was a great decision. We're seeing more of folks this year than we had in quite awhile. I just spent 5 days with our son in TX and we had a fantastic visit!.
Samster said:
We decided to re-focus our priorities on our own relationship, family, and friends. It was a great decision. We're seeing more of folks this year than we had in quite awhile.
Ditto...our reason for putting the Inn up for sale. Building a successful business put family on the back burner. Time to refocus our attention on what really matters!
 
Here is an interesting story from today.
My daughter is under anaesthesia this morning getting her 4 wisdom teeth removed. She has never done anything like this before. I couldn't be there because I have guests. DH who is swamped at work, took the day off to take her and be there. Unless it is something major he never takes a day off.
I have the phone handy in case they call with info on her. They left here at 6am.
The guests call from the room above the kitchen (another reason for caller id y'all) and the husband is upstairs barfing his guts out all night and morning. I ask about this, apparently she had this a few days ago, so it was not food related. I make up a special tray for them with cheese, biscuits, fruit, crackers, etc which she collects and brings up there.
So in a way I got a lump in my throat as I am here serving guests and helping out sick strangers in my home when my daughter will wake up without me there. But the choice of DH going and driving the 40 minutes home with her was a better one, although I would have liked to be there too.
sad_smile.gif
 
Here is an interesting story from today.
My daughter is under anaesthesia this morning getting her 4 wisdom teeth removed. She has never done anything like this before. I couldn't be there because I have guests. DH who is swamped at work, took the day off to take her and be there. Unless it is something major he never takes a day off.
I have the phone handy in case they call with info on her. They left here at 6am.
The guests call from the room above the kitchen (another reason for caller id y'all) and the husband is upstairs barfing his guts out all night and morning. I ask about this, apparently she had this a few days ago, so it was not food related. I make up a special tray for them with cheese, biscuits, fruit, crackers, etc which she collects and brings up there.
So in a way I got a lump in my throat as I am here serving guests and helping out sick strangers in my home when my daughter will wake up without me there. But the choice of DH going and driving the 40 minutes home with her was a better one, although I would have liked to be there too.
sad_smile.gif
.
Awwwww....I got teary when I read this. I still worry about our big kid who is soon to be 27. I hope it all went well with the wisdom teeth extraction. Mom can be there with the popsicles after.
{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
 
Here is an interesting story from today.
My daughter is under anaesthesia this morning getting her 4 wisdom teeth removed. She has never done anything like this before. I couldn't be there because I have guests. DH who is swamped at work, took the day off to take her and be there. Unless it is something major he never takes a day off.
I have the phone handy in case they call with info on her. They left here at 6am.
The guests call from the room above the kitchen (another reason for caller id y'all) and the husband is upstairs barfing his guts out all night and morning. I ask about this, apparently she had this a few days ago, so it was not food related. I make up a special tray for them with cheese, biscuits, fruit, crackers, etc which she collects and brings up there.
So in a way I got a lump in my throat as I am here serving guests and helping out sick strangers in my home when my daughter will wake up without me there. But the choice of DH going and driving the 40 minutes home with her was a better one, although I would have liked to be there too.
sad_smile.gif
.
Waiting at the door with a hug, poor baby, and comfort is VERY important. Driving home you would have to concentrate on the road rather than her. You can be there giving her undivided attention, at least for a while.
I hope all went well and she has little discomfort. Things have surely changed since I had mine out - I hope. She HAS to be getting more poor baby than I did no matter what.
 
Here is an interesting story from today.
My daughter is under anaesthesia this morning getting her 4 wisdom teeth removed. She has never done anything like this before. I couldn't be there because I have guests. DH who is swamped at work, took the day off to take her and be there. Unless it is something major he never takes a day off.
I have the phone handy in case they call with info on her. They left here at 6am.
The guests call from the room above the kitchen (another reason for caller id y'all) and the husband is upstairs barfing his guts out all night and morning. I ask about this, apparently she had this a few days ago, so it was not food related. I make up a special tray for them with cheese, biscuits, fruit, crackers, etc which she collects and brings up there.
So in a way I got a lump in my throat as I am here serving guests and helping out sick strangers in my home when my daughter will wake up without me there. But the choice of DH going and driving the 40 minutes home with her was a better one, although I would have liked to be there too.
sad_smile.gif
.
Joey Bloggs said:
although I would have liked
to be there too.
sad_smile.gif
{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}
 
Here is an interesting story from today.
My daughter is under anaesthesia this morning getting her 4 wisdom teeth removed. She has never done anything like this before. I couldn't be there because I have guests. DH who is swamped at work, took the day off to take her and be there. Unless it is something major he never takes a day off.
I have the phone handy in case they call with info on her. They left here at 6am.
The guests call from the room above the kitchen (another reason for caller id y'all) and the husband is upstairs barfing his guts out all night and morning. I ask about this, apparently she had this a few days ago, so it was not food related. I make up a special tray for them with cheese, biscuits, fruit, crackers, etc which she collects and brings up there.
So in a way I got a lump in my throat as I am here serving guests and helping out sick strangers in my home when my daughter will wake up without me there. But the choice of DH going and driving the 40 minutes home with her was a better one, although I would have liked to be there too.
sad_smile.gif
.
Even tho you probably don't want to...look at it like this...she gets some time with her dad. Gets to see that she is important enough that he takes time off work. I'm guessing there are a lot of us here who never got that feeling from their dads.
 
Here is an interesting story from today.
My daughter is under anaesthesia this morning getting her 4 wisdom teeth removed. She has never done anything like this before. I couldn't be there because I have guests. DH who is swamped at work, took the day off to take her and be there. Unless it is something major he never takes a day off.
I have the phone handy in case they call with info on her. They left here at 6am.
The guests call from the room above the kitchen (another reason for caller id y'all) and the husband is upstairs barfing his guts out all night and morning. I ask about this, apparently she had this a few days ago, so it was not food related. I make up a special tray for them with cheese, biscuits, fruit, crackers, etc which she collects and brings up there.
So in a way I got a lump in my throat as I am here serving guests and helping out sick strangers in my home when my daughter will wake up without me there. But the choice of DH going and driving the 40 minutes home with her was a better one, although I would have liked to be there too.
sad_smile.gif
.
Even tho you probably don't want to...look at it like this...she gets some time with her dad. Gets to see that she is important enough that he takes time off work. I'm guessing there are a lot of us here who never got that feeling from their dads.
.
That is an excellent point. I remember how my Daddy, as irrassible as he was, did take the time to take us where we needed to go whenever we needed to go for school or 4-H or band...... It meant a lot. JB, your daughter will forever remember that her Dad took her.
 
I remember the one year my Dad (who hates to go shopping) bought me a dress for my birthday. I don't know why my Mother didn't do the shopping but it made it all the better cause my Dad bought it! It's a good thing!
 
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