A new 'date' every month, how do you handle this?

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Madeleine's picture
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We have a guest who's been here 3-4 times now. The last 2 times (in less than 2 months) with a new lady friend each time. 

How do you handle this?

It's awkward in more than one way because the rest of his family and friends of his family also come here. And he's been seen here by friends of his family with different 'dates'. Makes me feel trashy, if you know what I mean. Kind of guilt by association. Mostly beause I don't know if he's lving with any of the other women who have been here and using this as his 'love nest'.

Basically, I'm not saying anything to anyone about anything but it's obvious to these women he's been here before because we know him. Not that any of them have asked if he's been here with someone else.

This is not the first instance of this in the past couple of months, either. We've also had a guest we know personally show up with a GF and then have had his wife call looking for him.

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birdwatcher's picture
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We've had a couple of guests like this...like recently (we're new to this job) She called from the road to make a reservation for ONE night and she arrived late, next thing we know there is another person at the door, they go out to dinner and No Breakfast please (fine with us). Next morning they leave happy as a lark-here is the kicker-the cards were for him- and they were thrown away-so we figured that he lived in town and she met him here-thats just what we figured...no name just Mr. "B" in the card...

It would bother me if I knew that his man came with his wife and kids and I would have to say something, its my Inn and if it bothered me that much its my call...and if not eventually he will get caught-its just a matter of time Smiling

Joey Camb's picture
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what we have had one or two of is people meet on internet dating sites and meet up in the middle so to speak figure its up to them as singles

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gillumhouse's picture
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There was a piano entertainer that a group of regulars would follow from lounge to lounge - we each had "OUR" songs that we sang. I remember the night I walked in and Walter immediately said, "I want to introduce you to my wife, Mary." - before I had a chance to ask him where Jan was or how she was. I had only seem him with his girlfriend although I did not know she was his girlfriend and not his wife. From that day on, Mary was always with him - they were in their 70s by then.

Proud Texan's picture
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We've had two such "players"  who did multiple stays with multiple partners.   It just so happened that they were both a__holes too.   They're both on our DNR list.

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Proud Texan wrote:

We've had two such "players"  who did multiple stays with multiple partners.   It just so happened that they were both a__holes too.   They're both on our DNR list.

And why they are 'players'  - 

Highlands John's picture
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On check-in..... "Oh you......never the same girl twice............."

 

No, I'm with the rest, say nothing.

Once had someone email and tell me that he had a booking in the next couple of days, and that he'd stayed before with a previous girlfriend and he'd really appreciate it if we didn't recognise him or mention the previous stay.

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Madeleine's picture
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It would have been nice had we known something like that in advance.

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JOEY    I'am laughing at the flowers in his room. Any smart woman wouild question why he's been here so many times and with whom ??

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Madeleine's picture
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Luckily, they did not arrive together so I had time to put my bland innkeeper face on for her arrival. I was really surprised because I seriously thought he was bringing another one of his kids for a 'father-daughter' getaway like he does with his son. Why did I think this? He didn't pick a 'romantic' room, he picked his usual room when he's here with the kid.

It's not that I care who he comes here with, I just don't like to have to put the game face on at a moment's notice. I'm not good at that. Dead giveaway for new GF's!

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 I would give him complimentary flowers in the room with his name on it since he is a repeat guest. Make him the big man at the inn to impress his lady. 

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It's his life.  We may not agree with it, but it's not up to us to judge.

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We all have our morals of how WE live our lives, unfortunately we have no control over our guests.  This said, this is YOUR home, your business and if this is uncomfortable for you, you need to end it with this guest.  Either say you do not have a room for him OR if you feel you can speak freely with him tell him you are uncomfortable. 

Generic's picture
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I'm an innkeeper, it's none of my business who they sleep with and/or what their marital situation is. For all you know, they could be fundamental Mormons and this is all the wives and he takes each for a special weekend.

It's the four monkeys... "hear no evil", "see no evil", "speak no evil" and "have no fun".

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Eric Arthur Blair wrote:

I'm an innkeeper, it's none of my business who they sleep with and/or what their marital situation is. For all you know, they could be fundamental Mormons and this is all the wives and he takes each for a special weekend.

It's the four monkeys... "hear no evil", "see no evil", "speak no evil" and "have no fun".

Arkie have you been watching Sister Wives again?  

I worked with a dude who brought a different wife to the quarterly meeting (he worked in an outer office in another state obv).  It took a while before we figured it out, he had 4, so he ran the gamut after the first year. We kept waiting to see who was next!

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Joey Bloggs wrote:

Arkie have you been watching Sister Wives again?  

I worked with a dude who brought a different wife to the quarterly meeting (he worked in an outer office in another state obv).  It took a while before we figured it out, he had 4, so he ran the gamut after the first year. We kept waiting to see who was next!

Never seen the show. We ended up in fundamentalist territory when visiting Utah's canyons one year. We stopped to get gas at Costco and "Laura Ingalls" was in the parking lot. So I asked a local about it....

(We actually know a real-life descendant of Laura Ingalls, but that's another story.)

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 Meant to say Eric. I am a typo queen today, sorry. Smiling You know who you are, that is all that counts. 

Arks's picture
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I'd say this one is decided on a house-by-house basis and there's no right answer to the situation. To each his/her own.

I agree with Breakfast Diva. If all are consenting adults, who they arrive with is not our business. I'm just glad they come.

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gillumhouse's picture
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I never saw a thing.

Breakfast Diva's picture
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I would be like the 3 little monkey...hear no evil, see no evil & speak no evil. Yes, I would feel weird, but really, I don't think it would be any of my business. He's obviously comfortable with sharing his 'special place' with his lady friends. If he wanted anonimity, he would go to a hotel.

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