Remembering what Your B&B IS and ISN't

The recent posts about non dairy 'milk' and special diets got me to thinking ... and remembering ...
each b&b/inn has to find its own focus. You can't be all things to all people.
Me? I wanted the place to be elegant ...
Elegant? Smack in the middle of a fishing village with all that implies ... the best I could attain was charming.
Perhaps two miles away up on a cliff it could have been elegant ... but not in the middle of the often foggy, usually drippy, early morning noisy, fish smelling sea air atmosphere with real sailors swearing like ... well ... sailors. I gave them free coffee for the taking every day and cajoled them into not blocking my driveway with their trucks when they ran into the general store or not leaving them idling in the road ... or throttling down or whatever its called their fishing boats and cruising along as they passed the guest room windows instead of leaning on their boat horns. The fisherfolk (men and women) would come up to the back deck in their high rubber boots and help themselves to the coffee set up there in an airpot ... fill up their thermos or mugs or paper cups.
So it was friendly and folksy but not elegant. I'd have to hose off the back steps if it didn't rain but it was all part of the charm of the place. And once in a while someone would leave me a couple lobster.

Thanks for that picture!
We bought a 'grandma's rustic' b&b and have migrated it to a vacation cottage. This suits us more. I also wanted elegant with fancy breakfasts, but I'm too casual. Now the inn fits us. And we fit the inn.
And to continue on for another 10 years, it's time to rethink the overall plan.

I understand your elegant desire. As we all know, I could not be elegant if I tried, BUT my wow factor is setting a table that is elegant. I remember Himself telling me about overhearing a returning rail-trail guest talking to the couples with them on their return visit (different friends this time). As the other couples came into the dining room, he was saying, "I told you so. Didn't I tell you."
At the time we had 3 with shared in a city (in WV over 2000 pop is a city) so small it does not hit the map, and the table was set with chargers, silver cutlery, bread plates with butter spreaders, goblet waters & juice (I used the wine goblets for juice), sherbets for the fruit dishes, cloth napkins with blown glass napkin rings.... That is my bit of elegant - my only bit.

An EXCELLENT post. One we can all relate... or should.
"I also wanted elegant with fancy breakfasts, but I'm too casual. Now the inn fits us. And we fit the inn."
Morticia
That is what we all should strive for. If you want your guests to be comfortable while staying with you, you need to be comfortable.

Copperhead said:

An EXCELLENT post. One we can all relate... or should.
"I also wanted elegant with fancy breakfasts, but I'm too casual. Now the inn fits us. And we fit the inn."
Morticia
That is what we all should strive for. If you want your guests to be comfortable while staying with you, you need to be comfortable..

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If you want your guests to be comfortable while staying with you, you need to be comfortable.
Exactly, which is why I do not live in one of the mansions.

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable."

TheBeachHouse said:

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable.".

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I ignore such comments. Unless they are experts. A lot of businesses and happy people are brought down by the opinions of the ignorant.

I aim for Cool Aunt's house - you know how everyone has an aunt they like to stay with - that's what I want.

undersea said:

TheBeachHouse said:

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable.".

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I ignore such comments. Unless they are experts. A lot of businesses and happy people are brought down by the opinions of the ignorant.
.

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This person built a contemporary house on the cliff in front of us and is siding it with copper. Good thing I have him to label my yard, 'tacky.'

TheBeachHouse said:

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable.".

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We are a casually elegant 1880's once-upon-a-time summer estate nearby the sea.
But Beachie, cause we have a gravel driveway typical of the period along with many homes surrounding us, a 30something TA reviewer insisted that we be given only 3 Stars, cause no property with an unpaved driveway could possibly be given more.

A person who would call your landscaping 'tacky' to your face has no class. And thus should be ignored.

Yes I totally agree...the innkeeper has to be totally comfortable with the tone of the B+B in order to be successful!
I wanted our guests to have a sense of place and history in a casual but sophisticated atmosphere. Elegantly simple was what we aimed for and hopefully achieved. It was tricky to preserve the casual, relaxed atmosphere amid the fine antiques and silver but DH sets the tone as soon as they drive in. We let our real personalities come through from the start (well, I try to keep my sharp edges under cover) and DH is a warm gentle giant that can put almost anyone at ease.
The addition of the cottage about 12 years ago enhanced our "sense of place" and was created to appear as though it was part of the original 150 year-old property. The use of high quality natural materials, workmanship and attention to detail continue with the elegantly simple theme.
But we are NOT a place for those who want all the bells and whistles of spa tubs, pool, buffet breakfast with many options, family accommodations, family pets, 24 hour concierge service....for that they need to book a resort property..and there are plenty of those here, at a price.

TheBeachHouse said:

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable.".

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This happens all the time here when someone from one of the "New...." states, to our south, moves in and tries to recreate their suburban look in our sandy, beach community. All of a sudden the green stuff, mostly weeds and crabgrass, that passes for a lawn here is dug up, the sod is laid down along with an expensive irrigation system. The chemicals come out to keep the lawn green and weed free. It looks lovely and is totally inappropriate for the sensitive location surrounded by estuaries and ponds. Sigh
The type of creeping suburbia you describe, with professional, chemical driven landscapes and out-of-character materials and architecture is eroding the simple, natural coastline communities of the entire state. The second homes are out numbering the residents, driving out the families and making the year-round economies of some towns unsustainable. Ahh, I better stop here...it makes me furious that this neighbor had the gall to criticize your property. In the old days, the old timers would just hand a cod fish down his chimney to remind him that he is simply a wash-ashore.

Momma Smurf said:

TheBeachHouse said:

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable.".

Click to expand...

We are a casually elegant 1880's once-upon-a-time summer estate nearby the sea.
But Beachie, cause we have a gravel driveway typical of the period along with many homes surrounding us, a 30something TA reviewer insisted that we be given only 3 Stars, cause no property with an unpaved driveway could possibly be given more.
.

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Momma Smurf said:

We are a casually elegant 1880's once-upon-a-time summer estate nearby the sea.
But Beachie, cause we have a gravel driveway typical of the period along with many homes surrounding us, a 30something TA reviewer insisted that we be given only 3 Stars, cause no property with an unpaved driveway could possibly be given more.

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Wow. did you respond?
We are pretty heartsick over what he has done to what used to be a scenic cottage as part of our cove view. Now, instead of part of our view of the cove, he is a huge focal point detracting from it.

TheBeachHouse said:

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable.".

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I think your neighbor is tacky for saying that. And probably jealous!

Morticia said:

TheBeachHouse said:

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable.".

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I think your neighbor is tacky for saying that. And probably jealous!
.

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Morticia said:

I think your neighbor is tacky for saying that. And probably jealous!

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full disclosure. we started it by telling him we disliked the copper siding and thought it didn't belong in this neighborhood. we hurt his feelings. this "Beetle Juice House" of his is his baby. Probably should have kept our opinion to ourselves.

uh oh .... so it was a self defense slam.

seashanty said:

uh oh .... so it was a self defense slam..

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seashanty said:

uh oh .... so it was a self defense slam.

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yeah...hanging my head in shame. But it obviously came from conversations he had had before. Oh well. City folk!

TheBeachHouse said:

Morticia said:

TheBeachHouse said:

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable.".

Click to expand...

I think your neighbor is tacky for saying that. And probably jealous!
.

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Morticia said:

I think your neighbor is tacky for saying that. And probably jealous!

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full disclosure. we started it by telling him we disliked the copper siding and thought it didn't belong in this neighborhood. we hurt his feelings. this "Beetle Juice House" of his is his baby. Probably should have kept our opinion to ourselves.
.

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He probably went to a great deal of expense to 'stand out' as he has in such an 'original' way. Hopefully you'll have a chance to patch things over in the spirit of neighborliness.
A fellow purchased the land across the creek from us then proceeded to allow friends to park their old boats there. Sigh. The vegetation IS re-growing. So far, only one guest has (privately) commented on it.

Momma Smurf said:

TheBeachHouse said:

My neighbor recently told me he considered our landscaping, "tacky." Yes, he said that.
I have been wracking my brain and reexamining to see what is tacky!!!! We have perennial beds around the porch. (A brand new, very elegant, mahogany porch, btw.) The beds have azaleas, hydrangeas, lavender, hostas. Pretty standard sea-side New England stuff. The house came with a huge anchor that was nearly covered with crabgrass. We uncovered it and surrounded it with rocks so you can now see it. We put in a koi pond at a large expense.
He specifically mentioned gravel driveways. Every other house on this street and in this town have gravel driveways!
We are an antique, Dutch Colonial "Captain's House" across the street from the ocean in a town that is most well known for it's harbor featuring a red fishing shack.
I don't think we are tacky. I think we are "coastal comfortable.".

Click to expand...

We are a casually elegant 1880's once-upon-a-time summer estate nearby the sea.
But Beachie, cause we have a gravel driveway typical of the period along with many homes surrounding us, a 30something TA reviewer insisted that we be given only 3 Stars, cause no property with an unpaved driveway could possibly be given more.
.

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Millennials. My fave.