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Ambivalent about compliment

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ukmaineiac

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Just had a wonderful housefull here. All rooms were potentially problematic but it wasn't just OK - it really worked beautifully. The dynamics were perfect and everyone's happiness was tangible.
One couple were here for a 10th Anniversary, so I did the whole romance thing. They left me a super complimentary pageful in my room book, but one of their comments was "Thank you so much for making this feel more like home and less like an inn". I know they meant it well, but it leaves me feeling a little nervous.
Another comment made me feel great though. I found out, as they were leaving, that he is an executive chef. Apparently the crisp I served was the best they'd ever had .... they don't think they'll ever one as good again ..... etc That comment however just makes me feel guilty. If they only knew how "low brow" it really is they would be singing a different tune. I guess the good thing is that they enjoyed it so I can continue to make it with a clear conscience :)
 

EmptyNest

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"Thank you so much for making this feel more like home and less like an inn". I know they meant it well, but it leaves me feeling a little nervous.
WHY??? Don't try and read too much into things....just enjoy!
 

ukmaineiac

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"Thank you so much for making this feel more like home and less like an inn". I know they meant it well, but it leaves me feeling a little nervous.
WHY??? Don't try and read too much into things....just enjoy!.
I'm sorry
. I just get to thinking that I want this to be better than a home, that maybe I should be more formal to match the surroundings, that maybe It's just plain not good enough ..... I have a very bad habit of over analyzing sometimes. I even wore make up yesterday !!!!
 

JBloggs

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You may be insulting THEM by your thoughts that your place is not homey. Think about it. They might actually have a wonderful home they love very much.
 

EmptyNest

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"Thank you so much for making this feel more like home and less like an inn". I know they meant it well, but it leaves me feeling a little nervous.
WHY??? Don't try and read too much into things....just enjoy!.
I'm sorry
. I just get to thinking that I want this to be better than a home, that maybe I should be more formal to match the surroundings, that maybe It's just plain not good enough ..... I have a very bad habit of over analyzing sometimes. I even wore make up yesterday !!!!
.
People "CRAVE" the homey feeling... I don't mean overdone with dust catchers everywhere or "frou frou"..but the feeling of being comforted and cared for. That is a gift and if you can provide that, then you are doing great!!!
 

Morticia

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"Thank you so much for making this feel more like home and less like an inn". I know they meant it well, but it leaves me feeling a little nervous.
WHY??? Don't try and read too much into things....just enjoy!.
I'm sorry
. I just get to thinking that I want this to be better than a home, that maybe I should be more formal to match the surroundings, that maybe It's just plain not good enough ..... I have a very bad habit of over analyzing sometimes. I even wore make up yesterday !!!!
.
Keep in mind that 'home' now is often just a collection of electronics. It's where there's laundry to do and bills to pay and stuff happens. You've created the 'home' everyone wishes they lived in.
Executive chefs don't know every trick, you know! Sometimes they get so caught up in 'nouveau' that they forget 'oldveau'.
My best cobbler is made with all the leftover fruit in the house. Anything that might fit goes in. I know zip about matching flavors so it all just goes in there. It gets raves. Would some executive chef make it the way I do? Probably not. I make comfort food, the stuff everyone remembers their grandmas making.
You have enough other stuff to worry about without worrying about getting compliments!
 

ukmaineiac

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You may be insulting THEM by your thoughts that your place is not homey. Think about it. They might actually have a wonderful home they love very much..
Oh Gosh - I certainly don't mean that at all - I guess I always hope I can give them something special that they DON'T have at home.
 

ukmaineiac

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You may be insulting THEM by your thoughts that your place is not homey. Think about it. They might actually have a wonderful home they love very much..
Oh Gosh - I certainly don't mean that at all - I guess I always hope I can give them something special that they DON'T have at home.
.
Sounds like you already do:)
.
You know - I just reread my post and it sounds as if I'm grubbing for compliments .... not intentional - I guess I'm just having an insecure day.

 

Morticia

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You may be insulting THEM by your thoughts that your place is not homey. Think about it. They might actually have a wonderful home they love very much..
Oh Gosh - I certainly don't mean that at all - I guess I always hope I can give them something special that they DON'T have at home.
.
UKMaineiac said:
Oh Gosh - I certainly don't mean that at all - I guess I always hope I can give them something special that they DON'T have at home.
What they don't have at home is someone anticipating what they might want. You know what home is like...you WISH someone would anticipate what you want, but only guys are married to mind readers.

Take it as a compliment that someone feels like they're home. That usually means they feel comfortable. It's horrible when you go away on vacation and everything at the B&B is so precious you have to hold your breath and try not to break something!
You know what's a better thought to keep in mind? Your place is like someone ELSE'S home. Someone whose house you're going to stay at and they've thought ahead to everything you might need. You've done the perfect 'English manor house' vacation where Jeeves is behind the scenes taking care of everything and Bertie can just bumble around and not worry. (If you don't like Jeeves, pick someone else, just not Basil!)
 

JBloggs

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I think we need to not over analyze everything. We will go insane if we do.
One thing I am confident is that any member of this forum goes above and beyond a simple room to stay in, their guests love every minute. You all excel at what you do.
 

gillumhouse

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but one of their comments was "Thank you so much for making this feel more like home and less like an inn". I know they meant it well, but it leaves me feeling a little nervous.
One of the nicest thing I have ever heard was when a couple from Staten Island had booked one night going and one night returning - and on the return I happened to have gone onto the porch just in time to hear him say as he got out of the car - "It feels so good to be home again."
Apparently the B & B they booked into was larger than us and had very little guest interaction. We were the first B & B they had ever stayed in and the destination was the second.
 

YellowSocks

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I agree... it's a total compliment that they felt it was personal, welcoming, and comfortable instead of institutional, impersonal, and stiff.
But now I want your cobbler recipe...
=)
Kk.
 
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