Murphy's Laws for Innkeepers

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i like these!
if you get up early to do a full breakfast for an early checkout, they just want a piece of toast and a cup of coffee (if that)
if you do something special for someone, or just have ONE room with a king size bed, they post a glowing review on trip advisor mentioning those rare things.
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The guests that swear that they'll post a glowing review on TripAdvisor rarely do.
The guests that you weren't exactly sure if they liked their stay or not or you barely had a chance to get to know will post a great review somewhere.
 
A guest will an allergy that could kill then won't tell you until you place the food in front of them.
You ask, why did you not tell me? They reply, "I didn't think you would be serving strawberries!"
 
If you have an open breakfast time, 6 rooms will come at 8 AM, eat quickly and be gone by 8:20 and the last room will show at 9:30 and want to relax with coffee before eating.
Which leads to- if you have space to seat 5 rooms, 7 rooms will congregate at once.
 
The last room you get to clean is the one that needs the quilts washed due to stains and the room that left the A/C on high and the windows open.
 
If you call a reporter to do an article on your grand opening she will be inexperienced, use poor grammar, and put your address on the wrong street..
YellowSocks said:
If you call a reporter to do an article on your grand opening she will be inexperienced, use poor grammar, and put your address on the wrong street.
Or she will make a typo in your URL.
 
A guest who books online and requires hypoallergenic everything - linens, cleaning products, etc. - and no dairy will turn out just to not like the smell of those cleansers (as opposed to being a person who will actually get sick from exposure).
 
Guests who state they have NO food allergies or dislikes will turn up their noses at anything with eggs. 'Oh, I don't eat eggs!"
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Another breakfast issue -
"I am not a big breakfast eater just toast and bacon will be fine!" Then you serve all the others and he's eyeing their plates almost drewlling over what he is NOT eating. Next moring I serve everyone and then put a 'samplier platter' next to him with an empty plate in front of him. He ate everything and said "Now that was a breakfast!"
 
The lactose intolerant and the gluten free will show up on the same day as the vegan and the air fern. They will bring a diabetic with them.
 
The lactose intolerant and the gluten free will show up on the same day as the vegan and the air fern. They will bring a diabetic with them..
I'd LOL, except it's already happened to me...
=)
Kk.
 
The lactose intolerant and the gluten free will show up on the same day as the vegan and the air fern. They will bring a diabetic with them..
Bree said:
The lactose intolerant and the gluten free will show up on the same day as the vegan and the air fern. They will bring a diabetic with them.
Now THAT has got to be the line in a joke!
The lactose intolerant remains anonomous until he has the ice cream on your fruit at breakfast simultaneou to someone using his detached bathroom as a public bathroom.
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The lactose intolerant and the gluten free will show up on the same day as the vegan and the air fern. They will bring a diabetic with them..
Bree said:
The lactose intolerant and the gluten free will show up on the same day as the vegan and the air fern. They will bring a diabetic with them.
Now THAT has got to be the line in a joke!
The lactose intolerant remains anonomous until he has the ice cream on your fruit at breakfast simultaneou to someone using his detached bathroom as a public bathroom.
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.
LOL A Vegan Air Fern and a Diabetic Celiac walk into a bar B&B ...
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The lactose intolerant and the gluten free will show up on the same day as the vegan and the air fern. They will bring a diabetic with them..
Bree said:
The lactose intolerant and the gluten free will show up on the same day as the vegan and the air fern. They will bring a diabetic with them.
Now THAT has got to be the line in a joke!
The lactose intolerant remains anonomous until he has the ice cream on your fruit at breakfast simultaneou to someone using his detached bathroom as a public bathroom.
regular_smile.gif

.
LOL A Vegan Air Fern and a Diabetic Celiac walk into a bar B&B ...
teeth_smile.gif

.
swirt said:
LOL A Vegan Air Fern and a Diabetic Celiac walk into a bar B&B ...
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...for a cup of coffee (black, no sugar or cream of course)
 
Yup, absolutely, they DON'T read -- that's just a given-- no matter how many little signs you place, they are still going to do what they want to do.
As far as walk-ins go, just say that the rooms are not ready and if they can please come back in an hour.
 
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