Got advice during my pre marriage counseling..."do not ever go into a marriage expecting you will make xxx change." And I never did...what you see if what you get
Change only comes from within...and sometimes as hard as I try myself...I am not able to change all the things someone...guess who...wants me too.
We've been together with all our faults for 29 years and it nothing will change us now Or on the other hand...better late than never
I did change - I changed the way it bothered me. some of the things that used to bug the heck out of me no longer do because I ignore them. I let DH pitch his fit and no longer try to "fix" the problem. I ignore certain people and have actually turned a few people who used to snark at me when they had a chance into being friendly - because I did not snark back.
One lady went from snark to taking me out to lunch last week because of that little award. All I did to turn her around was praise what she has done in town since she retired from her "previous life". She now does something I tried to get started about 10 years ago and all I said was it did not happen then because the time and people were not right. It needed HER to make it work - and she knows I meant it (because I do).
So people do change - it just depends on what you want changed and how you go about trying the make that change.
The good ol prayer works for me most times
God grant me the serinity to accept the things I cannot change
Courage to change the things I can
Wisdom to know the difference
Do you all ever notice the I in that prayer? Its all in the attitude and sometimes the hardest thing is to ACCEPT yourself or someone else just the way they are...instead of fighting to make someone else what YOU want them to be.