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References Request Dilemma

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cherry64

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I've been communicating back and forth with an inn owner that is interested in interviewing me for their innkeeper position. She now wants us to come down this weekend for a meet and greet, but first she wants my references. My dilemma comes in the fact that my references would be my bosses and I have not let them know that I am searching for another job, since we are passively looking right now. I don't really feel comfortable having my current boss called for a reference on a job that is only a maybe. I don't know if I will be offered the job or even if we are offered the job, that we will accept it. They are not to keen on us having cats and we are not to keen on what they tell us the innkeepers quarters are like.
What do you think I should do? Bite the bullet and talk to my boss or ask the inn owners to wait until after the meet and greet to decide if references need to be called? Other options?
Thanks for any input.
 

Morticia

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I like the idea of asking them if they can wait for the references as they are from a job you are presently at. However, as a future employer that makes me wonder if you'll scarper on ME later on down the road!
So, we need some brainstorming on the best way to say that.
You have NO other references other than your present job? Not from any other work?
Is it expected now that references come first? I thought all the career advice was to NOT send your references before an interview.
 

gillumhouse

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I believe I would try to phrase it as:
We prefer to wait until we have met, that you have had an opportunity to meet us and we have had an opportiunity to see the inn and innkeepers quarters to know if we are both interested in us forming a contract before we supply references.
 

cherry64

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I like the idea of asking them if they can wait for the references as they are from a job you are presently at. However, as a future employer that makes me wonder if you'll scarper on ME later on down the road!
So, we need some brainstorming on the best way to say that.
You have NO other references other than your present job? Not from any other work?
Is it expected now that references come first? I thought all the career advice was to NOT send your references before an interview..
Morticia said:
I like the idea of asking them if they can wait for the references as they are from a job you are presently at. However, as a future employer that makes me wonder if you'll scarper on ME later on down the road!
So, we need some brainstorming on the best way to say that.
You have NO other references other than your present job? Not from any other work?
Is it expected now that references come first? I thought all the career advice was to NOT send your references before an interview.
I've been at my current job since 97. So no real other options for professional references. I have some reliable friends I could ask, but those don't really hold the same kind of weight as professional work references have.
I've been told not to send references unless specifially asked. I had not heard about waiting until after the interview. But that very well could be the case now.
 

cherry64

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I believe I would try to phrase it as:
We prefer to wait until we have met, that you have had an opportunity to meet us and we have had an opportiunity to see the inn and innkeepers quarters to know if we are both interested in us forming a contract before we supply references..
gillumhouse said:
I believe I would try to phrase it as:
We prefer to wait until we have met, that you have had an opportunity to meet us and we have had an opportiunity to see the inn and innkeepers quarters to know if we are both interested in us forming a contract before we supply references.
That sounds great! Could I steal that?
 

gillumhouse

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I believe I would try to phrase it as:
We prefer to wait until we have met, that you have had an opportunity to meet us and we have had an opportiunity to see the inn and innkeepers quarters to know if we are both interested in us forming a contract before we supply references..
gillumhouse said:
I believe I would try to phrase it as:
We prefer to wait until we have met, that you have had an opportunity to meet us and we have had an opportiunity to see the inn and innkeepers quarters to know if we are both interested in us forming a contract before we supply references.
That sounds great! Could I steal that?
.
Be my guest.
 

Copperhead

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I have been working on resumes, etc. for my son - of course not for this line of work. Usually, all previous jobs including the present one is listed on the resume. It is customary that references are not submitted until requested and that is not done until the first interview. It is also an unwritten courtesy that your current employer is not called but of course small businesses such as this one may not be as knowledgeable in this courtesy.
I would think that if you have already provided your resume and have indicated you have been with the same company for 13 years and are still with them, that is saying quite a lot by itself. If you were not managing the business properly, not producing revenue or increasing revenue, you would have not seen the 13 year mark. This does say loads!!!!
I do not see the harm in asking for references from friends. If your resume does not include your current employer or at least how many years etc. you have been with them, I would at least include the longevity of your current employment and use gillums words regarding futher info.
Best of luck!
 

Innkeeper To Go

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I have been working on resumes, etc. for my son - of course not for this line of work. Usually, all previous jobs including the present one is listed on the resume. It is customary that references are not submitted until requested and that is not done until the first interview. It is also an unwritten courtesy that your current employer is not called but of course small businesses such as this one may not be as knowledgeable in this courtesy.
I would think that if you have already provided your resume and have indicated you have been with the same company for 13 years and are still with them, that is saying quite a lot by itself. If you were not managing the business properly, not producing revenue or increasing revenue, you would have not seen the 13 year mark. This does say loads!!!!
I do not see the harm in asking for references from friends. If your resume does not include your current employer or at least how many years etc. you have been with them, I would at least include the longevity of your current employment and use gillums words regarding futher info.
Best of luck!.
copperhead said:
I do not see the harm in asking for references from friends. If your resume does not include your current employer or at least how many years etc. you have been with them, I would at least include the longevity of your current employment and use gillums words regarding futher info.
Best of luck!
Ditto.
Just be clear that these are longterm personal references who can vouch for____ (fill in the blanks with whatever skills, strengths, experience your friends might be able to verify).
 

birdwatcher

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I would definantely go with what K said, and most of the time I did not submit references until after the first interrview, and because I owned my own Inn and was looking for an Innkeeping position I really didn't have any references other than professionals that worked with me, my webmaster, another Innkeeper and friends that have seen me run my business.
Good luck.
 

cherry64

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I email my response yesterday morning and I have not heard from her.
I am considering not taking this any further. I have some concerns about the innkeepers quarters being enough to live in, among other things. Maybe I shouldn't waste anymore other either of our time and just say no thanks....
 

Innkeeper To Go

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I email my response yesterday morning and I have not heard from her.
I am considering not taking this any further. I have some concerns about the innkeepers quarters being enough to live in, among other things. Maybe I shouldn't waste anymore other either of our time and just say no thanks.....
Give it a few days and see how you feel then. If you do get an offer, that's the time to bring up any concerns and work out a solution that suits everyone.
I've had owners propose just horrid living quarters only to come up with something much better to get me to come aboard. Owners who really want you as an innkeeper will work with you to find something suitable for you.
Don't give up too early. You'll only cheat yourself.
 
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