- May 22, 2008
- Reaction score
...because all the obnoxious guests are here and not at your place(s). This is a short rundown of the past 24 hours. Stop reading whenever you start to feel faint...
- Queen of DeNial has gone and taken child who has no problems at home back home. All they left behind were 2 huge bags of trash. And the wafting odor of, well, never mind, they're gone.
- Spent 2 hours at laundry yesterday. Washer is delayed until NEXT Tuesday. Will never shop for an appliance at Lowes' ever again. Never again. Come home to the following:
- Check-in yesterday defies description so I won't even try. May-December isn't even close. 5000 questions at check-in, what they don't want for dinner, aren't there any more exotic places, what's the local specialty, on and on. Go to room. They look. Noses so far in the air, they sniff, 'I guess it's ok.' Guest demands extra blankets. I say, 'There's a quilt and a blanket on the bed.' Not good enough, need more. I bring second blanket.Then they turn on the bathroom fan and immediately say, 'We booked a non-smoking room, this is a smoking room, I thought we booked a non-smoking room, we always book non-smoking, but this is a smoking room, you said it was non-smoking, we wouldn't have booked if we knew you allowed smoking.' (Holy cow, take a breath in there and stop accusing me of smoking in your room.) They were, however, correct, the whole room reeked. Guests in the room next door are standing in the hallway listening to this. I offer another room. No good. I offer to air out this room while they go to dinner. That will work. (This has all taken approximately 25 minutes.)
- Guest leaves, we race back to room to see what the heck is going on. Guest returns and says someone is smoking outside their window. Problem solved (except guest is weird beyond belief.)
- Earlier, another guest had checked in...wants 'well done' sausage. Heck, I can burn sausage with the best of them. This morning, I see sausage is still on plate, I ask if it wasn't cooked enough? 'Oh, it was, but I don't like the taste of this sausage.'
- Another guest sees radio collection and asks if she can take one to her room? I say they are just for display. 'There IS a radio in the room I hope.' Now why would you hope that? Absolutely needs a radio, should have packed one, can't sleep without one, why are there no radios in the room?' I say, 'Here, let's plug this one in and see what it sounds like,' and grab antique radio off mantel and take to room. (Hubs is furious when I tell him.)
- This morning...same guest who doesn't like the sausage can't connect to internet. 'Signal keeps going in and out, thought you advertised you had WiFi.' Look at guest's computer and he is connected to someone else's network (someone very obviously NOT us).
- May-Dec at breakfast. Look over cereal, don't like choices, don't we have oatmeal? Hubs says we have instant grits, I could have killed him. No, they only like the slow-cooked kind, don't we have that? I thought hubs had totally lost his mind at that point. Then they want their milk heated for the cereal they finally chose. Other guest has milk out and offers it to M-D guest. He says, 'No we don't like milk in our tea,' and then takes it out of the fridge 2 seconds after she puts it away and pours into tea. Didn't like tea selection, don't you have...? I am cross-eyed by now. (And no, amazingly enough, can you believe it, I did NOT buy the tea they wanted nor did I buy more cereal.)
- This morning...cleaning room of guests (sausage/internet guest) who stood and listened to the other guests complain about smoke smell. Same thing in their room. What? Smoker is long gone. Where is this coming from? Close all windows to see if we can narrow this down. Now have my first (yes, THIS is my first) 'do not book' guest. The guests who listened to the other guests complaining about smoke smell? Smoked up a storm in their bathroom. 60+ yos. Cig ash all over the place. If that couple had walked back in at that point, I would have slapped them both.
- Also this morning...go into May-Dec room, big sign on bed, 'Do not touch bed!' He mentioned at breakfast they sleep in sleeping bags. Huh? Then what do you need 3 blankets for? I am doing such a ton of laundry tomorrow, I can see that coming a mile away.
- Same room...shower door broken off hinge. Hubs has to fix, I have to clean rest of rooms.
- Next room guests had complained about floor lamp flickering. Whew! Easy peasy, new lightbulb.
- Pee palace is next up and last. Strip entire room and haul mattress & boxspring out to trash. Not sure how we get rid of that, tho, no one will take it away. Install new mattress & boxspring but floor needs to be shampooed as kid's wet clothes were piled up yesterday. And everything in room has to go to laundromat.
- Finally finish cleaning rooms at 3 PM. Head to laundry with 5 washer loads. Home in time to make own bed and vacuum (but not put vacuum away) before daughter arrives.
- Hubs finishes washing our clothes in basement (we have the second washer which is where all the towels have been done), then heads out to do groceries.
- I make cookies fro guests. LOVE that p-nut butter recipe, just LOVE it.
- Have lovely time at dinner with daughter & g-kids at EIGHT PM, when we could finally get away.
- 10 PM, kids in bed, hubs sound asleep, I had to tell story...