Can we still have kids?

[Morticia]

It can be done, but it won't be easy.
My kids are 4-1/2... we moved here when they were 2-1/2, opened with one room at 3-1/2... they still cry sometimes, and I leap up to quiet them. I couldn't have had four rooms with them at 3, but something wonderful happens about the time they turn four and it's a LOT easier when you can tell them to go outside and play, or go downstairs and watch a video, and they [usually] sleep through the night
Having family around would have helped a lot. My sister is nearby, but she has three of her own so it's not like I can dump them on her over often. If my mom were still alive they'd go spend the night there a LOT.
It depends a LOT on your layout, your attitude, your energy level, your personality, and your babies. The more separate your space, the better. The more energetic you guys are, the better. Are you there full-time or would your poor wife be all on her own?
Of course, one baby at a time would have been a lot easier on me...
=)
Kk..

I have a full time job but we do have a lot of family support on both sides. My parents own a big house with multiple rooms, pool, hot tub, sauna etc. so I would think even if we are there as they start to get into grade school age that could be a reasonable outlet for them.
I understand people thinking it's not fair to the kids but I was raised in a family business and most of the people that I know whom were raised in a family business (one of my co-workers grew up in a small family owned motel) have some of the best work ethic and are the best socially adjusted people you will find. I think/hope it imparts kids with skills that you can even learn in collage. I work with guys that have a masters and yet they are completely retarded when it comes to sitting down with companies and talking about business where as a kid growing up in a business environment can be leaps and bounds ahead of peers w/o even having an education.
.

Most kids who grow up in family businesses don't have their parent's customers in their house when they get home from school and in their kitchen when they wake up to pour their bowl of cheerios. Their parents leave the house, open the store, put in their hours, close the store at 6 pm, work a little later and go home to their family and house, away from their customers and are home on weekends or at least on Sundays, in most cases, when they don't have to deal with the business and can have family time. Your customers will be in your house with your family 7 days a week. Your weekends will be about your guests, not your family.
You'll become a master of the silent screaming match.
.

You'll become a master of the silent screaming match.

Maybe this is why there is no door on my bedroom. It would have been the first door the PO's would have gotten to once exiting the inn...the first door they could have slammed.

The door TO the inn doesn't slam well. It hits the latch and bounces open again. Nothing gained by that slam.

 

[YellowSocks]

It can be done, but it won't be easy.
My kids are 4-1/2... we moved here when they were 2-1/2, opened with one room at 3-1/2... they still cry sometimes, and I leap up to quiet them. I couldn't have had four rooms with them at 3, but something wonderful happens about the time they turn four and it's a LOT easier when you can tell them to go outside and play, or go downstairs and watch a video, and they [usually] sleep through the night
Having family around would have helped a lot. My sister is nearby, but she has three of her own so it's not like I can dump them on her over often. If my mom were still alive they'd go spend the night there a LOT.
It depends a LOT on your layout, your attitude, your energy level, your personality, and your babies. The more separate your space, the better. The more energetic you guys are, the better. Are you there full-time or would your poor wife be all on her own?
Of course, one baby at a time would have been a lot easier on me...
=)
Kk..

I have a full time job but we do have a lot of family support on both sides. My parents own a big house with multiple rooms, pool, hot tub, sauna etc. so I would think even if we are there as they start to get into grade school age that could be a reasonable outlet for them.
I understand people thinking it's not fair to the kids but I was raised in a family business and most of the people that I know whom were raised in a family business (one of my co-workers grew up in a small family owned motel) have some of the best work ethic and are the best socially adjusted people you will find. I think/hope it imparts kids with skills that you can even learn in collage. I work with guys that have a masters and yet they are completely retarded when it comes to sitting down with companies and talking about business where as a kid growing up in a business environment can be leaps and bounds ahead of peers w/o even having an education.
.

I have a full time job but we do have a lot of family support on both sides.

As JBJ said, make your plans where the help is a bonus. My mom died unexpectedly at 61, and when my kids were born I was 400 miles from my sister. The first five months of their lives was nothing but eat, sleep, feed babies (I breastfed until they were almost two). I couldn't have run a B&B at that point.

I think/hope it imparts kids with skills that you can even learn in college.

I agree. It's why I have a B&B... I was looking for a stay home business they could be a part of, and work hard in. Be prepared to work VERY, VERY hard while they're babies. Be prepared to come in and take over for your wife. Be prepared to work all day at your day job, then come home and put more hours of work.
=)
Kk.

 

[YellowSocks]

It can be done, but it won't be easy.
My kids are 4-1/2... we moved here when they were 2-1/2, opened with one room at 3-1/2... they still cry sometimes, and I leap up to quiet them. I couldn't have had four rooms with them at 3, but something wonderful happens about the time they turn four and it's a LOT easier when you can tell them to go outside and play, or go downstairs and watch a video, and they [usually] sleep through the night
Having family around would have helped a lot. My sister is nearby, but she has three of her own so it's not like I can dump them on her over often. If my mom were still alive they'd go spend the night there a LOT.
It depends a LOT on your layout, your attitude, your energy level, your personality, and your babies. The more separate your space, the better. The more energetic you guys are, the better. Are you there full-time or would your poor wife be all on her own?
Of course, one baby at a time would have been a lot easier on me...
=)
Kk..

I have a full time job but we do have a lot of family support on both sides. My parents own a big house with multiple rooms, pool, hot tub, sauna etc. so I would think even if we are there as they start to get into grade school age that could be a reasonable outlet for them.
I understand people thinking it's not fair to the kids but I was raised in a family business and most of the people that I know whom were raised in a family business (one of my co-workers grew up in a small family owned motel) have some of the best work ethic and are the best socially adjusted people you will find. I think/hope it imparts kids with skills that you can even learn in collage. I work with guys that have a masters and yet they are completely retarded when it comes to sitting down with companies and talking about business where as a kid growing up in a business environment can be leaps and bounds ahead of peers w/o even having an education.
.

I think you are probably right about the well-adjusted aspects. However it probably depends on what the family business is. The never ending nature of the day combined with the amount of time where someone has to be home waiting for guests to leave/arrive can make it difficult to have any spontaneous fun. Families need weekends yet in this business weekends are the busiest times.
These thoughts weigh on my mind as well as we contemplate the same thing.
.

Families need weekends yet in this business weekends are the busiest times.

Then you have to make your own weekends. Many pastors take off every Monday, or every Friday, and have it as their day of rest. You could block off every Wednesday, or whatever day, or even two nights every week and have your "weekend" then. July was crazy, but as soon as a lull came we took off to the beach for a day. We are also hoping to really make good use of the off season to spend extra time with the kids.
I've also found (at least so far) that you don't need an entire weekend to have special times. Going out for icees, or walking to the big playground, sends my kids into ecstacies.
=)
Kk.

 

[YellowSocks]

We have 5 guest rooms in the house and a cottage behind the house.
I hope that leaves a lot of room for adjustment of where we could stay if it becomes an issue..

your place will be baby and child friendly. guests need to be told that little ones are in the house and underfoot and that their little ones are welcome. you will likely have baby proofed and child proofed rooms plus books and gear. this is how i can see it working for you. that's your niche. i get lots of calls from folks with small children looking for places to stay.
.

I get lots of calls from folks with small children looking for places to stay.

There's definitely a niche, and a lot of traveling moms out there who are grateful for a family friendly place to stay!
=)
Kk.

 

[YellowSocks]

It can be done, but it won't be easy.
My kids are 4-1/2... we moved here when they were 2-1/2, opened with one room at 3-1/2... they still cry sometimes, and I leap up to quiet them. I couldn't have had four rooms with them at 3, but something wonderful happens about the time they turn four and it's a LOT easier when you can tell them to go outside and play, or go downstairs and watch a video, and they [usually] sleep through the night
Having family around would have helped a lot. My sister is nearby, but she has three of her own so it's not like I can dump them on her over often. If my mom were still alive they'd go spend the night there a LOT.
It depends a LOT on your layout, your attitude, your energy level, your personality, and your babies. The more separate your space, the better. The more energetic you guys are, the better. Are you there full-time or would your poor wife be all on her own?
Of course, one baby at a time would have been a lot easier on me...
=)
Kk..

I have a full time job but we do have a lot of family support on both sides. My parents own a big house with multiple rooms, pool, hot tub, sauna etc. so I would think even if we are there as they start to get into grade school age that could be a reasonable outlet for them.
I understand people thinking it's not fair to the kids but I was raised in a family business and most of the people that I know whom were raised in a family business (one of my co-workers grew up in a small family owned motel) have some of the best work ethic and are the best socially adjusted people you will find. I think/hope it imparts kids with skills that you can even learn in collage. I work with guys that have a masters and yet they are completely retarded when it comes to sitting down with companies and talking about business where as a kid growing up in a business environment can be leaps and bounds ahead of peers w/o even having an education.
.

I think you are probably right about the well-adjusted aspects. However it probably depends on what the family business is. The never ending nature of the day combined with the amount of time where someone has to be home waiting for guests to leave/arrive can make it difficult to have any spontaneous fun. Families need weekends yet in this business weekends are the busiest times.
These thoughts weigh on my mind as well as we contemplate the same thing.
.

But, you have cottages and the guests are not in your home..so that makes a big difference.
When YOU get up for the 3 AM feeding..you won't be disturbing your guests

.

This is true in my case. The noise would be a non-issue except perhaps during breakfast time.
I look at it more in terms of free time for doing family stuff. The summer is pretty much gone and I've managed to go kayak on the lake twice (all I have to do it walk down a flight stairs and push the thing in the water) and we've used the power boat twice as well.....that is pretty sad for the whole summer (especially when for us weatherwise it has been pretty good weather). I think, if I can't even find the time to do something I enjoy that doesn't even require that much time or preparation.... how could I raise a child while running the B&B? Many options, much to consider
.

I think, if I can't even find the time to do something I enjoy that doesn't even require that much time or preparation.... how could I raise a child while running the B&B?

I'm sure you've heard the expression, we find time for what's most important to us. I never find time to exercise, but I always find time (eventually) to catch up on reading the forum. My husband and kids are way more important that the forum to me, and we find ways to spend time together, even during the crunch times.
I feel very lucky to have twins... it's so much easier to do age appropriate stuff. This is the summer we do 4 yo stuff. Next year we'll do 5 yo stuff. In the next few months I'll probably get caught up enough (construction lingers, then decrapification, but our slow season is coming) to make some long term goals of what we'd like to do when they're old enough... trips, etc.
When I snatched my husband away to Maryland he had just turned 21 (supposedly for a summer job, but I kept him forever!). His parents said, "Oh, this was the summer we were going to spend time together." Hello? Your son is 21? Maybe you should have taken him someplace a little sooner? I am bound and determined that that will not happen to us. We only got to the beach once, but we went. We haven't gotten to the zoo yet this year, but we're going in the next couple of months, I'm determined! We've gone canoeing and bowling and swimming and all kinds of things this summer, in spite of busy-ness.
It can be done! But you have to make it happen... it won't happen by itself.
=)
Kk.

 

[YellowSocks]

Seashanty, I agree with you. I think that by having kids, one is more acceptable to having kids as guests. It can be your niche. It can be the "what" that you do.
Will it be difficult? YES! Will it be stressful? YES! Will it be worth it? It's only for you to answer.
I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.
Good luck!!!.

I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.

Involve them in every step of the process. Let them help pick where to go and which to buy. Let them see the financials and help weigh the pros and cons. Give them full consideration in the decision making process and let it be their B&B, too. Find ways to engage them in the process and let them get a feel for what the family is getting into.
=)
Kk.

 

[YellowSocks]

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!
A guest at check out mentioned he met DH and said, But he didn't seem like he wanted to talk to me.
NO? Because he had worked all morning at the B&B and was off to Lowe's after working all week, and TRYING to spend some time with his family before spending all day in the heat on maintenance and restoration work here.
EVERY WEEKEND is GUEST TIME, NOT FAMILY TIME. Sometime in the evening IF people are checked in you can do stuff together.
People ask questions and don't want the answers.
You do what you have to do. You make the best, take advantage of any situation. If I was running a farm, and the kids had to milk the cows at 4am every day, they would LEARN SOME GOOD THINGS FROM THAT TOO. Obv any thing you do, any business, any thing at all has it up side and down sides. BUT - you have to weigh them carefully.
I could make more money and be home evening and weekends EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR if I worked outside my home/B&B.
But now I am able to call the shots, run this business as I want to, do whatever I like..

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!

Wow, I feel very lucky. So far I haven't had much of that. I'm not sure if it's because I have fewer rooms, less business, or guests who are more independent. Tonight I checked them in and off we went to dinner. I chat with some guests, sometimes, but lots of times I don't (at least, not in the evening--breakfast's another story).
I do feel bad that my kids watch so many videos... they spend plenty of time down in the family room amusing themselves or playing outside.
=)
Kk.

 

[swirt]

It can be done, but it won't be easy.
My kids are 4-1/2... we moved here when they were 2-1/2, opened with one room at 3-1/2... they still cry sometimes, and I leap up to quiet them. I couldn't have had four rooms with them at 3, but something wonderful happens about the time they turn four and it's a LOT easier when you can tell them to go outside and play, or go downstairs and watch a video, and they [usually] sleep through the night
Having family around would have helped a lot. My sister is nearby, but she has three of her own so it's not like I can dump them on her over often. If my mom were still alive they'd go spend the night there a LOT.
It depends a LOT on your layout, your attitude, your energy level, your personality, and your babies. The more separate your space, the better. The more energetic you guys are, the better. Are you there full-time or would your poor wife be all on her own?
Of course, one baby at a time would have been a lot easier on me...
=)
Kk..

I have a full time job but we do have a lot of family support on both sides. My parents own a big house with multiple rooms, pool, hot tub, sauna etc. so I would think even if we are there as they start to get into grade school age that could be a reasonable outlet for them.
I understand people thinking it's not fair to the kids but I was raised in a family business and most of the people that I know whom were raised in a family business (one of my co-workers grew up in a small family owned motel) have some of the best work ethic and are the best socially adjusted people you will find. I think/hope it imparts kids with skills that you can even learn in collage. I work with guys that have a masters and yet they are completely retarded when it comes to sitting down with companies and talking about business where as a kid growing up in a business environment can be leaps and bounds ahead of peers w/o even having an education.
.

I think you are probably right about the well-adjusted aspects. However it probably depends on what the family business is. The never ending nature of the day combined with the amount of time where someone has to be home waiting for guests to leave/arrive can make it difficult to have any spontaneous fun. Families need weekends yet in this business weekends are the busiest times.
These thoughts weigh on my mind as well as we contemplate the same thing.
.

Families need weekends yet in this business weekends are the busiest times.

Then you have to make your own weekends. Many pastors take off every Monday, or every Friday, and have it as their day of rest. You could block off every Wednesday, or whatever day, or even two nights every week and have your "weekend" then. July was crazy, but as soon as a lull came we took off to the beach for a day. We are also hoping to really make good use of the off season to spend extra time with the kids.
I've also found (at least so far) that you don't need an entire weekend to have special times. Going out for icees, or walking to the big playground, sends my kids into ecstacies.
=)
Kk.
.

You are right, and sometimes making weekends just be another set of days (like wed + thur) is possible. <here comes the other side of the coin though> In many of the B&B's on this forum and elsewhere, one of the innkeepers works a traditional m-f day job to keep the steady income and benefits. So that person continually misses out on the newly scheduled weekend. The other half who is more the full-time innkeeper gets to spend every day with the children during the "inn week" and then also gets them for the wed+thur "inn weekend". This could (I'm guessing) lead to the full time innkeeper feeling like they are "burdened" with the child rearing and the m-f person feel like they are missing out on everything. The m-f worker fills in and contributes more on their sat and sun weekend so in a sense, they NEVER have a weekend while the more full time innkeeper gets wed and thur off. Long term, it has the real potential to get divisive.

 

[YellowSocks]

If I was going for the niche factor then, yes, but in reality, for me personally, I wouldn't do this with young children. Not to be the pessimist but....
We started when our son was age 7, daughter 13...and it's still stressful and hard on them, always having to be quiet...living your life around the schedule of the inn, remember, your guests think that you live to serve them, you couldn't possibly have a life outside of the inn.
What about school schedules and activities? How do you make back to school night in the middle of check-ins? (We did that one last night). What if your kids want to play out side and you have guests? Do they want to hang out with your kids? Most of the time, probably not!
We have to dance around these issues everyday, luckily we have a lot of SPACE and our kids are school age, so they are gone 8 hours a day, 5 days a week! But when the kids are home.... you are in the middle of check-ins- they are doing homework and chores, when you are trying to sit down to a meal together, you have to go check in all of your late guests or go to the door to address any questions or problems your guests may be having...Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Innkeeping is already an almost 24/7 job and trying to do it without sleep, you will be taking years off of your life. When you are up all night with a crying or sick child, you may be at the end of your rope physically and emotionally... oh, now add the 24/7 innkeeping schedule.
Tag teaming in the morning to get the kids to school and serve breakfast AT THE SAME TIME! On the weekends, when your guests and your kids are home, how do you share the space so that your kids don't feel like they are in SOMEONE ELSE'S house and have freedom and yet not disturb the guests? Who's watching your kids when you are cleaning the rooms, cooking, etc?There are a lot of things to keep in mind.
I will be honest, with a newborn, I would probably be hospitalized from exhaustion trying to do this, raising a baby, while rewarding and wonderful, is hard and draining, I think this job is the only thing I've done that even comes close to the energy drain of the 1st year with my kids.
And no offense but, if I was a guest trying to get away from my kids for a weekend, the last people I would want to be with would be someone else's kids!
If you don't plan well or have any major problems in your marriage now, start saving for the divorce and child support payments!.

Innkeeping is already an almost 24/7 job and trying to do it without sleep, you will be taking years off of your life. When you are up all night with a crying or sick child, you may be at the end of your rope physically and emotionally... oh, now add the 24/7 innkeeping schedule.

After my kids were born dh told someone it was the hardest job I'd ever had. I said, no, not the hardest, but the most relentless. There was no break, ever. Esp. with breastfeeding, it was months before I even got away from them for a couple of hours. Now I have Thursdays as my night out. It's usually just my diet meeting and Wal-Mart, but there are nights when I can't wait to be "off."
So... two 24/7 jobs. My solution is to blend them so that having a B&B is part of raising my kids. I'm hoping homeschooling will take the edge off the morning crunch and general school madness. (Which, BTW, after listening to my sister's stories is no cakewalk even without a B&B.) We tell people up front that there are kids here, and do not target romantic getaways. We carve out moments of fun when we can.
So far, so good, but I didn't start out with babies...
=)
Kk.

 

[JunieBJones (JBJ)]

Seashanty, I agree with you. I think that by having kids, one is more acceptable to having kids as guests. It can be your niche. It can be the "what" that you do.
Will it be difficult? YES! Will it be stressful? YES! Will it be worth it? It's only for you to answer.
I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.
Good luck!!!.

I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.

Involve them in every step of the process. Let them help pick where to go and which to buy. Let them see the financials and help weigh the pros and cons. Give them full consideration in the decision making process and let it be their B&B, too. Find ways to engage them in the process and let them get a feel for what the family is getting into.
=)
Kk.
.

I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.

Involve them in every step of the process. Let them help pick where to go and which to buy. Let them see the financials and help weigh the pros and cons. Give them full consideration in the decision making process and let it be their B&B, too. Find ways to engage them in the process and let them get a feel for what the family is getting into.
=)
Kk.

Disagree on that one. They have enough to keep up with and stay focused. We talk shop - two rooms in tonight, this that and the other. Lots of that to keep them in the loop. We always talk shop. But they make ZERO decisions in this B&B. They will never see financials or any guest information. They might ask the names of a guest who they may have met, but they don't wander in and out of the guest areas.
Last night they chose where they wanted to go for dinner, that was their treat, after an eye exam and ordering new glasses.
They cannot keep their room clean, they cannot do what they are told to do without being told more than once - they are kids. But they are kids who do their own laundry and have more chores than the average ninento playing kid.
We are way way too strict (which has nothing to do with the B&B it is our personalities). A little boy was hanging around outside at check in, we sent him away. Come back during the week if you want to play, not on a weekend.
If you are talking about BEFORE buying a B&B and explaining it all to them, then YES 100% for explaining the big changes ahead and dealing with them.

 

[JunieBJones (JBJ)]

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!
A guest at check out mentioned he met DH and said, But he didn't seem like he wanted to talk to me.
NO? Because he had worked all morning at the B&B and was off to Lowe's after working all week, and TRYING to spend some time with his family before spending all day in the heat on maintenance and restoration work here.
EVERY WEEKEND is GUEST TIME, NOT FAMILY TIME. Sometime in the evening IF people are checked in you can do stuff together.
People ask questions and don't want the answers.
You do what you have to do. You make the best, take advantage of any situation. If I was running a farm, and the kids had to milk the cows at 4am every day, they would LEARN SOME GOOD THINGS FROM THAT TOO. Obv any thing you do, any business, any thing at all has it up side and down sides. BUT - you have to weigh them carefully.
I could make more money and be home evening and weekends EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR if I worked outside my home/B&B.
But now I am able to call the shots, run this business as I want to, do whatever I like..

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!

Wow, I feel very lucky. So far I haven't had much of that. I'm not sure if it's because I have fewer rooms, less business, or guests who are more independent. Tonight I checked them in and off we went to dinner. I chat with some guests, sometimes, but lots of times I don't (at least, not in the evening--breakfast's another story).
I do feel bad that my kids watch so many videos... they spend plenty of time down in the family room amusing themselves or playing outside.
=)
Kk.
.

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!

Wow, I feel very lucky. So far I haven't had much of that. I'm not sure if it's because I have fewer rooms, less business, or guests who are more independent. Tonight I checked them in and off we went to dinner. I chat with some guests, sometimes, but lots of times I don't (at least, not in the evening--breakfast's another story).
I do feel bad that my kids watch so many videos... they spend plenty of time down in the family room amusing themselves or playing outside.
=)
Kk.

Tonight we made a tex mex chex mix. say that 10 times...

 

[YellowSocks]

Seashanty, I agree with you. I think that by having kids, one is more acceptable to having kids as guests. It can be your niche. It can be the "what" that you do.
Will it be difficult? YES! Will it be stressful? YES! Will it be worth it? It's only for you to answer.
I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.
Good luck!!!.

I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.

Involve them in every step of the process. Let them help pick where to go and which to buy. Let them see the financials and help weigh the pros and cons. Give them full consideration in the decision making process and let it be their B&B, too. Find ways to engage them in the process and let them get a feel for what the family is getting into.
=)
Kk.
.

I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.

Involve them in every step of the process. Let them help pick where to go and which to buy. Let them see the financials and help weigh the pros and cons. Give them full consideration in the decision making process and let it be their B&B, too. Find ways to engage them in the process and let them get a feel for what the family is getting into.
=)
Kk.

Disagree on that one. They have enough to keep up with and stay focused. We talk shop - two rooms in tonight, this that and the other. Lots of that to keep them in the loop. We always talk shop. But they make ZERO decisions in this B&B. They will never see financials or any guest information. They might ask the names of a guest who they may have met, but they don't wander in and out of the guest areas.
Last night they chose where they wanted to go for dinner, that was their treat, after an eye exam and ordering new glasses.
They cannot keep their room clean, they cannot do what they are told to do without being told more than once - they are kids. But they are kids who do their own laundry and have more chores than the average ninento playing kid.
We are way way too strict (which has nothing to do with the B&B it is our personalities). A little boy was hanging around outside at check in, we sent him away. Come back during the week if you want to play, not on a weekend.
If you are talking about BEFORE buying a B&B and explaining it all to them, then YES 100% for explaining the big changes ahead and dealing with them.
.

If you are talking about BEFORE buying a B&B and explaining it all to them, then YES 100% for explaining the big changes ahead and dealing with them.

Yes, that's what I was talking about--BEFORE buying. They're going to be moving, having their lives completely changed. It will be easier for them if they're involved and feel some ownership of what's happening.
=)
Kk.

 

[YellowSocks]

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!
A guest at check out mentioned he met DH and said, But he didn't seem like he wanted to talk to me.
NO? Because he had worked all morning at the B&B and was off to Lowe's after working all week, and TRYING to spend some time with his family before spending all day in the heat on maintenance and restoration work here.
EVERY WEEKEND is GUEST TIME, NOT FAMILY TIME. Sometime in the evening IF people are checked in you can do stuff together.
People ask questions and don't want the answers.
You do what you have to do. You make the best, take advantage of any situation. If I was running a farm, and the kids had to milk the cows at 4am every day, they would LEARN SOME GOOD THINGS FROM THAT TOO. Obv any thing you do, any business, any thing at all has it up side and down sides. BUT - you have to weigh them carefully.
I could make more money and be home evening and weekends EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR if I worked outside my home/B&B.
But now I am able to call the shots, run this business as I want to, do whatever I like..

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!

Wow, I feel very lucky. So far I haven't had much of that. I'm not sure if it's because I have fewer rooms, less business, or guests who are more independent. Tonight I checked them in and off we went to dinner. I chat with some guests, sometimes, but lots of times I don't (at least, not in the evening--breakfast's another story).
I do feel bad that my kids watch so many videos... they spend plenty of time down in the family room amusing themselves or playing outside.
=)
Kk.
.

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!

Wow, I feel very lucky. So far I haven't had much of that. I'm not sure if it's because I have fewer rooms, less business, or guests who are more independent. Tonight I checked them in and off we went to dinner. I chat with some guests, sometimes, but lots of times I don't (at least, not in the evening--breakfast's another story).
I do feel bad that my kids watch so many videos... they spend plenty of time down in the family room amusing themselves or playing outside.
=)
Kk.

Tonight we made a tex mex chex mix. say that 10 times...
.

Tonight we made a tex mex chex mix. say that 10 times...

Tonight we went out for Tex Mex, but no Chex Mix.
=)
Kk.

 

[JunieBJones (JBJ)]

Seashanty, I agree with you. I think that by having kids, one is more acceptable to having kids as guests. It can be your niche. It can be the "what" that you do.
Will it be difficult? YES! Will it be stressful? YES! Will it be worth it? It's only for you to answer.
I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.
Good luck!!!.

I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.

Involve them in every step of the process. Let them help pick where to go and which to buy. Let them see the financials and help weigh the pros and cons. Give them full consideration in the decision making process and let it be their B&B, too. Find ways to engage them in the process and let them get a feel for what the family is getting into.
=)
Kk.
.

I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.

Involve them in every step of the process. Let them help pick where to go and which to buy. Let them see the financials and help weigh the pros and cons. Give them full consideration in the decision making process and let it be their B&B, too. Find ways to engage them in the process and let them get a feel for what the family is getting into.
=)
Kk.

Disagree on that one. They have enough to keep up with and stay focused. We talk shop - two rooms in tonight, this that and the other. Lots of that to keep them in the loop. We always talk shop. But they make ZERO decisions in this B&B. They will never see financials or any guest information. They might ask the names of a guest who they may have met, but they don't wander in and out of the guest areas.
Last night they chose where they wanted to go for dinner, that was their treat, after an eye exam and ordering new glasses.
They cannot keep their room clean, they cannot do what they are told to do without being told more than once - they are kids. But they are kids who do their own laundry and have more chores than the average ninento playing kid.
We are way way too strict (which has nothing to do with the B&B it is our personalities). A little boy was hanging around outside at check in, we sent him away. Come back during the week if you want to play, not on a weekend.
If you are talking about BEFORE buying a B&B and explaining it all to them, then YES 100% for explaining the big changes ahead and dealing with them.
.

If you are talking about BEFORE buying a B&B and explaining it all to them, then YES 100% for explaining the big changes ahead and dealing with them.

Yes, that's what I was talking about--BEFORE buying. They're going to be moving, having their lives completely changed. It will be easier for them if they're involved and feel some ownership of what's happening.
=)
Kk.
.

If you are talking about BEFORE buying a B&B and explaining it all to them, then YES 100% for explaining the big changes ahead and dealing with them.

Yes, that's what I was talking about--BEFORE buying. They're going to be moving, having their lives completely changed. It will be easier for them if they're involved and feel some ownership of what's happening.
=)
Kk.

Oh definately! In fact, get them involved right away. From the start. I have TWO ROOMS with names from these DDx2. Competition ensues over which gets more bookings. There are alot of things if I had more energy COULD do with these two rooms to make them 'own' them even more. But putting their names on the doors really helped and made them feel special!
They love getting tips, they love meeting guests from AROUND THE WORLD. That is when our guests LOVE MEETING KIDS, local American kids, they adore it! Hug them and squeeze them. I don't push them on honeymooners.

But we have NO TOYS IN THE YARD, NO BIKES or SKATES along the back, no crapola anywhere a guest can see it. My Dad wanted to talk us into a trampoline for them in the back and I said nope, not at a B&B.

 

[JunieBJones (JBJ)]

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!
A guest at check out mentioned he met DH and said, But he didn't seem like he wanted to talk to me.
NO? Because he had worked all morning at the B&B and was off to Lowe's after working all week, and TRYING to spend some time with his family before spending all day in the heat on maintenance and restoration work here.
EVERY WEEKEND is GUEST TIME, NOT FAMILY TIME. Sometime in the evening IF people are checked in you can do stuff together.
People ask questions and don't want the answers.
You do what you have to do. You make the best, take advantage of any situation. If I was running a farm, and the kids had to milk the cows at 4am every day, they would LEARN SOME GOOD THINGS FROM THAT TOO. Obv any thing you do, any business, any thing at all has it up side and down sides. BUT - you have to weigh them carefully.
I could make more money and be home evening and weekends EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR if I worked outside my home/B&B.
But now I am able to call the shots, run this business as I want to, do whatever I like..

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!

Wow, I feel very lucky. So far I haven't had much of that. I'm not sure if it's because I have fewer rooms, less business, or guests who are more independent. Tonight I checked them in and off we went to dinner. I chat with some guests, sometimes, but lots of times I don't (at least, not in the evening--breakfast's another story).
I do feel bad that my kids watch so many videos... they spend plenty of time down in the family room amusing themselves or playing outside.
=)
Kk.
.

Come back to the table and everyone else is done and clearing the table and there's your cold plate, the dinner conversation is over and now your kids have to get ready for bed.
Story of my life right now, 100%. I am ADAMANT about FAMLY TIME. But it does not matter. The guests feel cheated, I am telling you this for fact. They WILL TAKE whatever they want to take. I GET SO ANGRY when a guest corners me and I KNOW MY KIDS are in the kitchen waiting to go shopping or to a movie. GRRRRRRR!

Wow, I feel very lucky. So far I haven't had much of that. I'm not sure if it's because I have fewer rooms, less business, or guests who are more independent. Tonight I checked them in and off we went to dinner. I chat with some guests, sometimes, but lots of times I don't (at least, not in the evening--breakfast's another story).
I do feel bad that my kids watch so many videos... they spend plenty of time down in the family room amusing themselves or playing outside.
=)
Kk.

Tonight we made a tex mex chex mix. say that 10 times...
.

Tonight we made a tex mex chex mix. say that 10 times...

Tonight we went out for Tex Mex, but no Chex Mix.
=)
Kk.
.

Tonight we made a tex mex chex mix. say that 10 times...

Tonight we went out for Tex Mex, but no Chex Mix.
=)
Kk.

Turned out great too, Threw in a packet of burrito seasoning left over from the cabin trip, and Louisiana hot hot sauce. A dash of teriyaki in lieu of Worcestershire sauce.

 

[YellowSocks]

Seashanty, I agree with you. I think that by having kids, one is more acceptable to having kids as guests. It can be your niche. It can be the "what" that you do.
Will it be difficult? YES! Will it be stressful? YES! Will it be worth it? It's only for you to answer.
I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.
Good luck!!!.

I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.

Involve them in every step of the process. Let them help pick where to go and which to buy. Let them see the financials and help weigh the pros and cons. Give them full consideration in the decision making process and let it be their B&B, too. Find ways to engage them in the process and let them get a feel for what the family is getting into.
=)
Kk.
.

I have 2 kids, ages 10 & 9 and we are looking at B&Bs right now. I think that it will help us define who we are in the B&B scene because we will be parents. As our kids grow and leave (hopefully) we will be able to change, too.

Involve them in every step of the process. Let them help pick where to go and which to buy. Let them see the financials and help weigh the pros and cons. Give them full consideration in the decision making process and let it be their B&B, too. Find ways to engage them in the process and let them get a feel for what the family is getting into.
=)
Kk.

Disagree on that one. They have enough to keep up with and stay focused. We talk shop - two rooms in tonight, this that and the other. Lots of that to keep them in the loop. We always talk shop. But they make ZERO decisions in this B&B. They will never see financials or any guest information. They might ask the names of a guest who they may have met, but they don't wander in and out of the guest areas.
Last night they chose where they wanted to go for dinner, that was their treat, after an eye exam and ordering new glasses.
They cannot keep their room clean, they cannot do what they are told to do without being told more than once - they are kids. But they are kids who do their own laundry and have more chores than the average ninento playing kid.
We are way way too strict (which has nothing to do with the B&B it is our personalities). A little boy was hanging around outside at check in, we sent him away. Come back during the week if you want to play, not on a weekend.
If you are talking about BEFORE buying a B&B and explaining it all to them, then YES 100% for explaining the big changes ahead and dealing with them.
.

If you are talking about BEFORE buying a B&B and explaining it all to them, then YES 100% for explaining the big changes ahead and dealing with them.

Yes, that's what I was talking about--BEFORE buying. They're going to be moving, having their lives completely changed. It will be easier for them if they're involved and feel some ownership of what's happening.
=)
Kk.
.

If you are talking about BEFORE buying a B&B and explaining it all to them, then YES 100% for explaining the big changes ahead and dealing with them.

Yes, that's what I was talking about--BEFORE buying. They're going to be moving, having their lives completely changed. It will be easier for them if they're involved and feel some ownership of what's happening.
=)
Kk.

Oh definately! In fact, get them involved right away. From the start. I have TWO ROOMS with names from these DDx2. Competition ensues over which gets more bookings. There are alot of things if I had more energy COULD do with these two rooms to make them 'own' them even more. But putting their names on the doors really helped and made them feel special!
They love getting tips, they love meeting guests from AROUND THE WORLD. That is when our guests LOVE MEETING KIDS, local American kids, they adore it! Hug them and squeeze them. I don't push them on honeymooners.

But we have NO TOYS IN THE YARD, NO BIKES or SKATES along the back, no crapola anywhere a guest can see it. My Dad wanted to talk us into a trampoline for them in the back and I said nope, not at a B&B.
.

But we have NO TOYS IN THE YARD, NO BIKES or SKATES along the back, no crapola anywhere a guest can see it. My Dad wanted to talk us into a trampoline for them in the back and I said nope, not at a B&B.

Your B&B is a lot prettier than mine!
We have some toys in the yard... not scattered all over or I get on their case, but that's us, not the B&B. There's a space in the yard kind of behind the garage that is somewhat sheltered and most of the toys are over there. When the dean came from the university for a tour earlier this week I moved all their toys over there so only the one big slide thing was visible. For most of our guests, though, I don't move anything.
But they are not allowed toys on the first floor (common areas) beyond a few small ones on the end of the island in the kitchen. They have to keep them in their room upstairs, or in the family room downstairs.
And no dog. (But then, you have a dog and we don't, so it balances out in the end!)
=)
Kk.

 

[Samster]

After reading all the posts, you have lots to think about! The main thing is that you have to consider how you want to live your lives. My dh & I had very demanding corporate jobs for the last 6 years before we moved here & our family life suffered. It happens everyday in all walks of life. You have to make time for what is important to you! There are lots of jobs, careers, professions where we could all use a wake-up call about this!
In this business you have to work around all the aspects of guests and then there is the "behind the scenes" part of the business - marketing, shopping, maintenance, paperwork, etc. If you are working full-time outside of your B&B, your wife will be doing most of the work. I guarantee it as there are several of us here in that position with about the same number of rooms that you're talking about (6). And, you have to be able to count on only yourselves or pay people to work for you. Don't count on family to just pitch in. We have grown kids and I just had to disappoint our son by telling him that I might not be able to drive up to see him for his birthday weekend. If we get bookings, I need to take them since we have been in such a lull. There are bills to pay! Sad, I know.
Separate space is very important for most innkeepers & I think paramount if you have a family. Every innkeeper that has a family has told me this. And there are innkeepers that have had to change their living arrangements to improve their quality of family life (move off-site, build a separate smaller home, or expand their quarters are all examples of what some have done). One of our inns here was recently sold because the owners wanted to spend more time with their school age children, who were born while the parents operated the inn.
We had great friends when our son was in elementary school who owned a restaurant - the mom was the one who kept everything together at home because their dad was always working in the family biz. Owning your own business is very demanding but it can be done.
Choices...something to think about.