When they force you to do the opposite of what you would normally do...

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Don Draper

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We have frequent repeat guests here. Some of you are quite familiar with them because you met them in person, others because of the sagas of their stays I've posted here. The latest was back in the fall when they took it upon themselves to lay a fire in our wood burning, living room fireplace (when we had specifically NOT set one that day because it was so windy) and then proceeded to burn just about every stick of firewood we had. We called them on it, they apologized profusely and after they left here promptly made another reservation to stay, which began yesterday.
FORTUNATELY, they booked when we had the "no breakfast" discounted rates for yesterday and today, so at least we do not have to sit through the agony that is breakfast. They are just truly odd, their conversation is never what one would consider "normal" (either in VOLUME or content) and it's actually a relief that they are the only people here for these first two days because it usually gets awkward at the breakfast table once others realize that they mean to monopolize the conversation with their unusual talk.
My point on this thread is that these two are really forcing me to impose limits that I NEVER would. It's making me feel inhospitable and cranky, when I know darn well that if I were to do my normal routine they would take advantage and I would still be cranky. For instance, we strive to have as close to a "bottomless" cookie jar as we can, most times we never even get past 2 dozen cookies even with a full house because people are out and about. But these two sit here all day and make dinner out of our cookies each evening. So yesterday I put out half a dozen for the two of them and that was IT. Low and behold they actually went out for dinner! That was a first. This morning we don't have full breakfast but I put out coffee and muffins. I put out 8 mini-muffins for the two of them (when normally I would have put out at least a dozen, just for the look of the "full" basket). I know however many I put out is how many they will eat. Same with half and half, yesterday I set out a fresh quart and this morning HALF of it is gone...for TWO PEOPLE! I am not refilling it until it is bone empty.
I HATE doing things this way. I feel like a miser. Grrr...
 

Alibi Ike

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I know what you mean by feeling miserly and cranky because guests push limits. Here's to a better next few days.
 

JBloggs

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So you and DH need to decide if their "weirdness" is worth their cash.
People who are "there" all day and are not so very very strange won't push the boundaries and send you into a straightjacket. Now they seem to be coming back more and more as they really really love what you have for them. I think you may be the only people who put up with them, which is very sad, but probably true.
 

egoodell

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I know what you mean too! Like when we go in to fluff the room and find all our cookies and snacks packed in a baggie to go home with them!!!! Come on!
RIki
 

Country Girl

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With repeat guests like those we end up adjusting our normal behavior to something abnormal because they just don't understand limits. We offer wine and cheese in the afternoon/early evening. They are the individual sized wine bottles. Most guests will have one glass of wine but I have one repeat guest that thinks ALL the wine is for her. I learned very quickly that when she is here I only put out two bottles for her. That works fine when there are no other guests but it's a huge problem when we are full. I sort of have to monitor her to see how many she takes. Also, I bake some sort of bread/muffin dish each morning as part of breakfast. Recently I had a guest here for 7 days. She did not touch the bread/muffin for the first two days. On the third morning I decided not bother baking something. Of course that morning she decided she did want it. Luckily I had a scone from the previous day so I served her that. On the fourth morning I baked something again. She never touched it! It went back and forth like that for the entire week. She also would turn the heat up to 72 and open all the windows! She wants to come back again in April and I'm really torn whether I want to take her or not. I hate feeling this way too.
 

JBloggs

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So what you're saying is "Do I adjust what I normally do and give them MORE to keep them out of everything else or do I give them less" either way you get mad that they have no boundaries.
"[COLOR= rgb(123, 83, 123)]When they force you to do the opposite of what you would normally do..."[/COLOR]
You have explained in a nutshell how I feel as a parent. The thing I do not want to do is the thing I do, as I get pushed right over the edge in zero flat.
 

Don Draper

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It's just weird, I know I am doing the right thing for our business yet I still feel "badly" about it. Why? I have NO REASON to feel badly. THEY SHOULD, but of course they don't have the sense God gave a rock so I guess it's my job to provide it.
I'm over it. 3 hours later and they are still planted in the living room drinking coffee and tea and cocoa (of course all the muffins are gone). I will stalk them until they *hopefully* leave the house so I can freshen up their room, then I'm back to hiding. I refuse to interact with them, which is of course again against everything I AM. I do not want these people here, ever. I don't know what makes them come back again and again. I don't think they ever leave the house other than their trips here, honestly.
 

Samster

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It's just weird, I know I am doing the right thing for our business yet I still feel "badly" about it. Why? I have NO REASON to feel badly. THEY SHOULD, but of course they don't have the sense God gave a rock so I guess it's my job to provide it.
I'm over it. 3 hours later and they are still planted in the living room drinking coffee and tea and cocoa (of course all the muffins are gone). I will stalk them until they *hopefully* leave the house so I can freshen up their room, then I'm back to hiding. I refuse to interact with them, which is of course again against everything I AM. I do not want these people here, ever. I don't know what makes them come back again and again. I don't think they ever leave the house other than their trips here, honestly..
They like getting away to your place, they're comfortable there, & it's a change of scenery for them. Just be gracious and go about your business. You don't have to like all your guests. If you can't get to refresh their room, just leave some fresh towels (and whatever else you provide) in a basket outside the room.
 

Alibi Ike

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It's just weird, I know I am doing the right thing for our business yet I still feel "badly" about it. Why? I have NO REASON to feel badly. THEY SHOULD, but of course they don't have the sense God gave a rock so I guess it's my job to provide it.
I'm over it. 3 hours later and they are still planted in the living room drinking coffee and tea and cocoa (of course all the muffins are gone). I will stalk them until they *hopefully* leave the house so I can freshen up their room, then I'm back to hiding. I refuse to interact with them, which is of course again against everything I AM. I do not want these people here, ever. I don't know what makes them come back again and again. I don't think they ever leave the house other than their trips here, honestly..
Can you ask them if they'd like the room freshened or does that bring on all sorts of other problems? I know when we're wanting to get on with the day and guests look like they're planted, we just ask them if they want their room tidied.
However, if they're chatters or followers I get why you wouldn't want to do that.
 

Don Draper

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They are stalkers. Luckily they usually leave by 11:30 or so. I emptied their trash (which consisted of our candy wrappers and used tea bags), they didn't touch soap or towels. The toilet was not to be described. So I freshened up, just put out their 6 cookies and fresh hot water for this afternoon, along with another half-full bottle of half and half (of course, they used every drop of the last bottle). They will not lay eyes on me today.
1 down, 3 to go...
 

Gingerbread Latte

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There have been several occasions where I've gone to a B&B just to hang out. No particular reason other than to get away, read and relax, or contemplate a major decision. But I never ate a plate full of muffins.... Haha
 

gillumhouse

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There have been several occasions where I've gone to a B&B just to hang out. No particular reason other than to get away, read and relax, or contemplate a major decision. But I never ate a plate full of muffins.... Haha.
I have had a couple ladies who came here to relax, read, and write (they both were budding authors) and I provided both with plates of muffins and a perpetual teapot or coffee pot during their stay. They did not have to ask. They were lovely hermits during their stays (different times).
 

Don Draper

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We get plenty of people just looking for a nice quiet stay. I'm THRILLED when we can provide that.
This situation is NOT NORMAL. Not going to elaborate anymore, I'm taking Samster's advice...I've done my job well and that's all that's required. I'm not wasting any more energy on it.
 

gillumhouse

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We get plenty of people just looking for a nice quiet stay. I'm THRILLED when we can provide that.
This situation is NOT NORMAL. Not going to elaborate anymore, I'm taking Samster's advice...I've done my job well and that's all that's required. I'm not wasting any more energy on it..
Good thought - otherwise it eats at you and they are oblivious anyway.
 

JBloggs

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Don it is hard to express how bad it is, I would have never imagined except I saw them myself. It just sounds like they are enjoying your place, when you read it here, not that they are super strange (that being understated).
 

gillumhouse

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Don it is hard to express how bad it is, I would have never imagined except I saw them myself. It just sounds like they are enjoying your place, when you read it here, not that they are super strange (that being understated)..
For goodness sake! Did my family get out again?
 

Samster

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We get plenty of people just looking for a nice quiet stay. I'm THRILLED when we can provide that.
This situation is NOT NORMAL. Not going to elaborate anymore, I'm taking Samster's advice...I've done my job well and that's all that's required. I'm not wasting any more energy on it..
Entertaining them as if they're your in-laws isn't a requirement of innkeeping. :) Sometimes you just need to be busy in another area of the inn....
 

Copperhead

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Entertaining them as if they're your in-laws isn't a requirement of innkeeping.
This needs to be quoted in the COMPLETE GUIDE TO INNKEEPING !
 

Don Draper

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Don it is hard to express how bad it is, I would have never imagined except I saw them myself. It just sounds like they are enjoying your place, when you read it here, not that they are super strange (that being understated)..
I am so glad there is someone out there who can appreciate the weirdness factor...it's hard to describe. Thanks JB

 

gillumhouse

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Don it is hard to express how bad it is, I would have never imagined except I saw them myself. It just sounds like they are enjoying your place, when you read it here, not that they are super strange (that being understated)..
I am so glad there is someone out there who can appreciate the weirdness factor...it's hard to describe. Thanks JB

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Don, I truly can appreciate the weird factor. I have had just a few of them here - thankfully they were one nighters, but it was only partly tongue-in-cheek about the family comment. I had an aunt who even BEFORE the Big A was weird. They do not all wear tinfoil hats so we can identify them easier. The world is full of weird.
 

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