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The quandary of emotional blackmail

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The Farmers Daughter

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I received a call from a guest cancelling his reservation for this weekend. This person received the confirmation email with all the policies and cancellation timeframe for his reservation.
He was due to propose to his girlfriend this weekend. Unfortunately, it seems he has been dumped.
When I explained that I was very sorry and I understood that he was not coming, he was still reponsible for %50 of his reservation. A string of profanities ensue and he proceeds to inform me that if he is unable to cancel his reservation, he will spend the next 48 hours destroying me online. .....hummm....guess I can see why she dumped him. I'm still charging him. What would you do?
 

Don Draper

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This stinks, and there's no easy answer. Absolutely charge him according to your policy, and just keep everything documented, so you can dispute anything he might post on TA, etc. Maybe once he calms down he'll realize he's taking his anger out on the wrong person.
He should be happy, had it been here he had the reso for he'd be getting charged the full amount.
 

JBloggs

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Not to rain on your parade but I just got this from a cancellation and it amazed me "I really was looking forward to it. I will visit sometime in the future and I have told a lot of friends that I work with in the Police department. Take care and please subscribe me to any electronic newsletters. David "
I have never had anyone ASK to be added to an email list before! And after they cancelled.
FD what will you do? Stick to your policies I say. And once again, document, save all those emails as ugly as they are!!
 

EmptyNest

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Stick to your policies. DId he OK he'd read them etc etc? If not, you can remind him he did and say, sorry but I am still charging you. He can rant all he wants on line...so what...everyone knows places have policies.
 

wendydk

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Sounds to me like it's worth not having him there, even if you end DO up losing some revenue...at least that's how I would look at it.
 

Innkeeper To Go

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Sounds to me like it's worth not having him there, even if you end DO up losing some revenue...at least that's how I would look at it..
I agree. What a toad.
I'd probably not let him off the hook instantly from the threat. Let him stew a bit and, hopefully, chill out as well.
But I'd also be conscious of the damage he could do to your reputation if he really wanted to - and not give that kind of power to such a jerk.
How much revenue are we talking about? Is it worth it?
Personally, I'd let him go gladly. And just consider it good riddance.
His ex-fiancee no doubt feels the same way.
 

gillumhouse

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Stick to your policy. It is like a child going to hold his breath. OK, he can write a nasty on the 1000 lb gorilla BUT YOU can do a mangement response to that. And just how does he think he - one nasty worm - can destroy your reputaion? He has probably gotten his way with this threat in the past and thinks it will intimidate you. You have the documentation and the ability to do response. If you cave with this one, you will have to cave with everyone in the future.
I do not ignore the "power" of that particular gorilla in the mind of the public, but this is MY business and I am going to be the only one who runs it. PERIOD!
 

EmptyNest

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Sounds to me like it's worth not having him there, even if you end DO up losing some revenue...at least that's how I would look at it..
I agree. What a toad.
I'd probably not let him off the hook instantly from the threat. Let him stew a bit and, hopefully, chill out as well.
But I'd also be conscious of the damage he could do to your reputation if he really wanted to - and not give that kind of power to such a jerk.
How much revenue are we talking about? Is it worth it?
Personally, I'd let him go gladly. And just consider it good riddance.
His ex-fiancee no doubt feels the same way.
.
Oh come on now...you are into innkeeper hostage taking now:-( Damage reputation? Give me a break, the guy deserves to pay and if he wants to rant then so be it. She can always post a TA mgt response. Sure it probably isn't that much revenue, but when she has to take the s**t that guy dished out..why should she cut him a break???
 

Innkeeper To Go

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Sounds to me like it's worth not having him there, even if you end DO up losing some revenue...at least that's how I would look at it..
I agree. What a toad.
I'd probably not let him off the hook instantly from the threat. Let him stew a bit and, hopefully, chill out as well.
But I'd also be conscious of the damage he could do to your reputation if he really wanted to - and not give that kind of power to such a jerk.
How much revenue are we talking about? Is it worth it?
Personally, I'd let him go gladly. And just consider it good riddance.
His ex-fiancee no doubt feels the same way.
.
Oh come on now...you are into innkeeper hostage taking now:-( Damage reputation? Give me a break, the guy deserves to pay and if he wants to rant then so be it. She can always post a TA mgt response. Sure it probably isn't that much revenue, but when she has to take the s**t that guy dished out..why should she cut him a break???
.
Catlady, I totally understand your POV.
I'm just saying, for me, I'd be happy to not have this guy as a guest in my inn.
And the reality is that the damage he could do may be greater than the possible gain in revenue.
I'm not for winning the battle but losing the war. But that's just me.
 

EmptyNest

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Sounds to me like it's worth not having him there, even if you end DO up losing some revenue...at least that's how I would look at it..
I agree. What a toad.
I'd probably not let him off the hook instantly from the threat. Let him stew a bit and, hopefully, chill out as well.
But I'd also be conscious of the damage he could do to your reputation if he really wanted to - and not give that kind of power to such a jerk.
How much revenue are we talking about? Is it worth it?
Personally, I'd let him go gladly. And just consider it good riddance.
His ex-fiancee no doubt feels the same way.
.
Oh come on now...you are into innkeeper hostage taking now:-( Damage reputation? Give me a break, the guy deserves to pay and if he wants to rant then so be it. She can always post a TA mgt response. Sure it probably isn't that much revenue, but when she has to take the s**t that guy dished out..why should she cut him a break???
.
Catlady, I totally understand your POV.
I'm just saying, for me, I'd be happy to not have this guy as a guest in my inn.
And the reality is that the damage he could do may be greater than the possible gain in revenue.
I'm not for winning the battle but losing the war. But that's just me.
.
Yeah..you sound just like my husband:) We never did agree on how to deal with these situations. He says "it's not worth the grief." And I always said "that's not the point. Rules are rules ...that's why I took the time to state them."
I still don't believe this one guy could do that much damage. It is a matter of personal conviction at this point. FD should be able to have the self satisfaction and not cave into someone giving her that kind of tirade. If he would have been the least bit apologetic and approached her differently, then...maybe a different outcome could have been agreed upon.
 

Morticia

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What did you say to the threat when he made it? (Just curious.)
 

The Farmers Daughter

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I feel like to allow him off the hook is much like keeping a dog who bites.
If he gets away with it, it will reinforce in his mind that this is ok or acceptable behavior. Its not. Next month he may do the same thing to another innkeeper using threats and insults to get his way.
 
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Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents
Mary in Bridgewater.
 

Don Draper

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Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents
Mary in Bridgewater..
AMEN TO THAT!!!!! Do not reward bad behavior, period.
 

wendydk

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Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents
Mary in Bridgewater..
"just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies"
I don't believe that a policy decision in favor of a guest (or my sanity) makes me somehow dishonest or less honest than an innkeeper who never deviates from published policies.
 

JBloggs

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Follow your gut.
You are the one receiving the abuse, not us. So you will know what to do FD.
 

Innkeeper To Go

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Innkeepers who do not stick to there written policies make it difficult for other Innkeepers who do.Had a couple cancel at the last moment and thought I was a pushover like the last Innkeeper they canceled with. I did get the B&B's name (another state) But I charged them according to my policies... no bad Trip Advisor report from them either..and that was 3 yrs ago. Ever time I read about an Innkeeper not adhearing to there policies I know it's just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies. my 2 cents
Mary in Bridgewater..
"just making it hard for an honest Inn to follow its policies"
I don't believe that a policy decision in favor of a guest (or my sanity) makes me somehow dishonest or less honest than an innkeeper who never deviates from published policies.
.
Amen.
Different policies mean just that: different policies. No more, no less.
Innkeepers should always consider what they will lose and what they will gain from each decision they make regarding enforcement of policies.
Some want to lay down the law. Others may take a more gracious approach.
Neither one is necessarily more honest than the other.
The dishonesty comes in, IMO, when attacks start flying rather than dialogue. That's not nice, not fair, and well, just not an honest discussion.
 

Copperhead

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The question was - What would you do?
To that I would say I would charge him. On top of it being MY policy, he was rude and abusive and there is NO reason for that type of behavior. If he had been polite, I would have offered a credit if I were able to rebook. I will not reward bad behavior. He stated the threat because he knows it works, otherwise it would not have been mentioned. I will not back down due to those type of threats, it is not good for my business or for others in the industry.
 
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